Someone just sent me a free pair of socks. That’s more than you have ever done for me, you piece of shit. Speaking of piece of shit, here is a picture a Mischa Barton’s dog sniffing her asscrack. I know that some of you dream about sniffing ass but this isn’t Brokeback Mountain. Speaking of Brokeback Mountain, Heath Ledger was at the same bar as me on Saturday. If I wasn’t so drunk I would’ve noticed him and got you an autograph, you fucking homo. Cuddles.

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