I guess the good news for some of you is that if Paris Hilton doesn’t die of AIDS, she will die of brain cancer. Bitch is always on her fucking phone and the sad thing is that it is never with me. We had a text message relationship for about a week that ended 2 weeks ago, but everytime I called her asking to borrow $1000, bitch would hang up on me. I remember calling her on a Sunday afternoon, about 9 am her time and she was at a fucking event with too much noise to hear me, while I was still in my underwear when the only noise around me was my whore of a wife snoring, but she wasn’t even asleep, which only makes sense if you are obese.

I am watching Degrassi and it’s about the computer geek who made the wrestling team and is trying to make wait. Dude became fucking bullemic and if that’s not gay, I don’t know what is. The fat girl on the show became a plus sized model and is rolling in it, by it I mean cookie dough cuz with her new found income, bitch can afford all the cookie dough she wants…

Let’s talk about you for a change. I feel like I always dominate the conversation and that’s not right….I am honestly interested in knowing how your life is coming along. Are you still in your mom’s basement and are you still a virgin? Did you ever end up getting your internet girlfriend on cam yet…Have you beat your number of orgasms in a day jerk off record yet? Give me an update. Thanks in advance.

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