Our token gay blogger, Julien, sent this to me this morning via email, and since I know most of you are virgins, and probably closet homos anyways, I figured I would post this and give you some insight into your little “dilemma”.

As a gay, I know that “Gaydar” really exists. I can spot a fellow homo walking down the street, riding a bus, showering at the gym, hell, wherever. I’ve been doing it ever since I knew that I wanted to kiss other guys, which was at the age of 4. I’ve gotten it down to a science. I know when a guy is a fag before he does. Now, a lot of people, mostly straight men, think that Gaydar is bullshit. Probably because they are afraid that the gays are going to find out that they are actually in the closet. (PS we already know)

I’ve decided that the straight male equivalent to Gaydar is “Fake Breastar”. Every straight guy I know claims that they can spot fake breasts from a mile away. They claim it’s in the way they bounce, their shape etc. Now, being a pure-blooded homosexual, my breast experience is very limited. I touch a boob maybe once every 3 years (and against my will of course). Here is Jessica Simpson at an after-party for her bullshit swimwear launch. As I stated before, I
don’t know a tit from a hole in the ground, so I’m not saying that Jessica’s boobs are fake.

But I do think they might be gay.

Smooch!

Julian

Posted in:Jessica Simpson|Tits|Unsorted