Dancing with the stars seems to be digging into the crates trying to find some table scrap celebrities willing to disrupt their busy schedule of doing nothing to do the show. Shannon Elizabeth is the token hot girl this season, while everyone else on the roster are people I’ve never fuckin’ heard of. Making me wonder if the next step for Dancing with the Stars is going to be Dancing with People who Have Been on TV Once. It will be less table scraps celebrities and more real life people who have happened to have been on TV, like American Idol reject, talk show guests and maybe even audience members of live TV that you only see for a split second when they pan over the crowd…

I know that you all conisder this bitch and her shitty old lady ass in her shitty poverty jogging pants to be something special because you fell in love with her in American Pie and by fell in love, I mean masturbated to repeatedly. Reality is that American Pie came out 10 fuckin’ years ago and all she was in the movie was a hot set of tits who is now pushing 40. Stop living in the past, even if was the height of your popularity.

That said, dancing is for queers and the only dance I do is called sitting on my couch all day in my own mess surfing the internet and drinking whiskey until the sun comes up. It’s a pretty lonely dance.

Posted in:Ass|Dancing|Shannon Elizabeth