So Lindsay Lohan went out shopping yesterday with her skinny fucking legs. If you’re wondering why I am posting these irrelevant pictures, it’s because I’ve decided to become a documentarian. If you’re wondering what I am trying to document, it is her obvious impending death. I figure I’ll just do it one post at a time eventually hitting the fuckin’ gold.

So in these pictures, you’ll notice that she has a cigarette in her hand. You’d think that the nicotine would constrict her blood vessels and increase her blood pressure enough to put her heart into shock, leading to her last puff being her last breath, but she manages to power through the shit without passing the fuck out and convulsing on the ground. I guess the rumors are true and she is a fucking cockroach…Maybe next time our documentary will conclude, but I’m sure she’s got a few more weeks in her. Stay tuned.

Guess what, Lohan and Ronson flew into the UK last night. Isn’t it exciting knowing that maybe, just maybe, their plane will crash on the flight home, ideally with only one fatality. I’m talking to you Lohan, or she could always just stay overseas, but I don’t see much fun in that, unless she got kidnapped by Terrorists and left in the desert when they realized her vagina was not good enough to gang rape, you know with all the open sores, forcing them to go back to fuck their camels, and not worth the ransom money they thought she was worth, you know since their a solid 5 years behind when it comes to popculture there.

Posted in:Dying|Lindsay Lohan