Guess what happens when you close a hundred million dollar deal with American Idol to add to your already insane level of success you have experienced the last 10 years…you get groupie gold diggin’ bitches who convince themselves that you are hot shit because they want a record deal and an exit strategy from their shitty broke ass lives and figure you look better than the billionaire Anna Nicole Smith prostituted herself to, because they’ve seen you on TV and they like that you’re an asshole with a horrible fake tan and that’s enough to make any pussy quiver with excitement the second they meet you in person, at least enough to give you a lap dance in the middle of a club because I guess all girls are wallet fuckin’ whores and if she fucks you the best she’s ever fucked, she thinks she won’t get voted off this week and will make it to LA. Get it, that was an American Idol joke. I’m pretty clever. Admit it.

Posted in:Groupie|Simon Cowell|Slut|Whore