I may have no soul, but for some reason I love Christmas, especially the carols. I don’t know what it is, but I can listen to that shit all year round, I can watch the movies all year round, and when everyone is with their families building snowmen and sitting by the fire telling happy memories and stories of Jesus, I’m busy jerking off to Juliette Lewis in her Family Vacation, 16 and awkward looking, the kind of girl who didn’t get fucked in high school but wanted to so bad she’d spend her nights masturbating….I’m hard just thinking about her ugly little face…

Here are her crackhead legs lookin’ fit cuz drug addicts don’t eat 20 years later.

Posted in:Juliette Lewis