I’m not a fashion consultant, but I could be, provided the people hiring me were interested in learning how to dress like you’re poor, don’t shower, don’t wash your clothes….you know practically homeless, thrift store/mission specials from over decades ago, that’s I’ve kinda just wear them into the ground….soiled, stained, been through and seen more shit, both figuratively and literally than most 25 years old…..

But even I know, if you’re built with short, thick legs, you should probably rock a pair of very very tall heels….cuz shit will lean you out, and make the world forget you’re a sturdy bitch who can hold her own when a motherfucker chokes you out for being a total cunt who lead him to choke you out…you crazy bajan trash….

Here are her stumpy, thick, shitty legs cuz when I see skin, even on clown-haired freaks, I get excited….now if only she was juggling….my balls….in her mouth….Do-Do DoDo DoDo Do-Do Do Do…..(that was my attempt at writing out the circus song)….

Posted in:Rihanna