Dakota Johnson is Don Johnson’s Miami Vice ejaculate that was left inside Melanie Griffith’s womb when they were likely on drugs in the 80s…and relevant…

She’s not on my list of favorite celebrity kids who work as actors because acting is a joke and anyone can do it…but she’s a celebrity kid who work as actors because acting is a joke…They are like social media influencers with a budget….

The most interesting thing about her is that her grandma was jerked off on by Hitchcock during the filming of The Birds…back when creepy directors were celebrated and no one cared what slutty girls they took advantage of, but instead focused on the movies….

Something that gives Dakota some street cred….but not really….just another rich kid…being a rich kid…trying to find purpose and doing it via taking jobs her family friends give her….

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