I really try my hardest to not leave the house. I don’t have a job. I don’t have hobbies. I don’t have friends and those who have though they were my friends because I’m a really charismatic and great guy people like to be around decide to invite me places…I never go.

Sometimes, because I am internet famous, even if no one has ever heard of me, the site has enough traffic for me to get free tickets and invites places….and I refuse to go…I like to sit and stare at walls…I don’t care to write the next great American Novel, movie or TV show…I barely care to come up with clever things to say about sluts, I’ve said it all, I’ve come at this shit from every angle and it is boring..I just like to be left alone…to stare at wall.

But I have seen a fat and awkward Charli XCX perform, which is hilarious to me. I don’t go to concerts EVER….but there she was at a club performance…doing something awkward, unexciting, like a soundcloud artist gone viral on social media which kids are excited about…but that was zero exciting or inspiring…

She does have big tits though and she shows them off…I’ll give her that, or she’ll give us that….it’s her gift far more exciting than her performing art that has made her “famous” if she’s even famous…

I think she may just be the back-up Rita Ora for when Rita Ora craps out….and they need a busty chubby british girl who gets half naked for attention….it’s all a fucking simulation…these are all ROBOTS.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Charli XCX|SFW