Kristin Cavallari has a hot dog / hallway style vagina thanks to using it to breed athlete sponsored babies over the course of the last decade, because it’s easier to let rich guys cum in you to bring you the good life, than it is to do work or whatever.

She’s from Laguna Beach, but thought she was too big or too important for reality TV, so she ended up just being a cum dumpster, or breeding pig you find at the animal rescue after they’ve been used the fuck up and are no longer of use to said breeder. Only unlike the breeding pig at the animal rescue, this bitch collects a monthly check.

Sure, she can pretend to be an entrepreneur with a lifestyle brand like a mini Paltrow and I’m sure her brand does well, but let’s not let instagram businesses take us off course of her being a child support payment recipient.

Luckily, with money comes vanity and with vanity comes not allowing herself to get fat, so that she can selfie with confidence with her tits out, in an age appropriate one piece….

I’ll stare at the mom tits, plus we can pretend her childbirth was more a c-section to keep the cunt intact, as she knows her bank account may rely on it being in good working condition…

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Kristin Cavallari