Kristin Cavallari is the reality TV star from Laguna Beach, who was too good for the far more popular spinoff The Hills, because she felt she would make it as a mainstream actress…

Instead, she became an NFL WAG, which is probably the Laguna Beach dream, because it means an endless summer vacation.

She has since been divorced, dated some 20 year old as divorcees do, got a set of tits to offset being an aged out mom, committed to fitness so that she can show off her ripped body with the bolt ons….and as much as you don’t want to like an old lady in a bikini, it’s hard to not appreciate this old lady in a bikini.

She is a lifestyle brand, influencer, all masterful and still producing clickbait cuz bitches know that tits get hits, that’s why they buy the tits…

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Kristin Cavallari is more than just a strong chin filled with BOTOX and fillers, she’s also got breast implants that she likes to use to promote whatever bullshit she’s selling, it is called the MIDDLE AGED FAKE TIT PANDERING which you have probably seen happen with DIVORCEES trying to relive their glory days they missed out on because they settled at a young age for that FAMILY thing, but have now been sold on being WINE MOMS with disposable income to live that ladies who lunch dream….of fucking younger dudes because THEY AREN’T DEAD yet, even if their ovaries are.

Rich white women, some of the most annoying creatures around….but you know, when you see a reality star from 20 years ago still able to lead them to pasture, or off the lemming cliff, you have to laugh….while jerking off to the fake tits since the fake tits aren’t in their 40s so it doesn’t make you weird.

In conclusion, never trust a Kristen who spells her name with an “i”….Kristin, what the fuck is that, get outta here…

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As a right wing extremist, MAGA supporting, Trump loving, COVID SHOT hating, who is more black-pilled, more anti-establishment, aware the system is rigged and that evil with evil intentions is in charge….and they hate you.

They rely on you being asleep at the wheel, braindead, high estrogen, anti-family, high on anti-depressant medicated, sick, fed on poison water and food…and retarded information to keep you deranged, in the dark, on their side and influenced by evil without even realizing you’re influenced by evil.

I appreciate Kristin Cavallari accepting her conspiracy label the media has given her for saying Britney and Kanye are clones…..because they are.

She has been an anti-vaxxer since I was asleep and brainwashed like so many of you, but glad I’ve escaped those blinders and see the light.

What I have learned is that the right wing conspiracy chicks are the hottest, still human, fit, into family and not whoring and many are blonde all-Americans.

The conspiracy movement is going to be the future, these are the future news , so hop on board and trust nobody…

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Kristin Cavallari is the reality star who was too good for reality TV, because she believed in her tits enough to get fake tits, and she took those tits to Hollywood thinking they’ll hook her up because her show was so popular, while the spinoff show she refused to be on ended up becoming a bigger hit than the original show, forcing her to crawl back to reality TV in the final season of that show…

Now I have never seen Laguna Beach or the Hills, but I always felt like Cavallari was an entitled cunt, even before she married, bred and divorced a star football player, even before she got fake tits.

She’s now some social media inspo, divorcee who was fucking a 19 year old, for other sad women to feel better about being fucked by young perverts, in their old, sad, failed marriage and broken family they were responsible for keeping unbroken but sucked….

She’s got a clothing brand, she’s doing media, her tits are out…there’s nipple…not that they are her actual tits, but fake tits presented as her actual tits, which are still tits.

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I saw some story about Kristin Cavallari, some garbage reality star from 20 years ago, talking about how she’s GAINED weight, or PUT ON A LOT OF WEIGHT, and the media is running with the story, at least the traditional media like Yahoo, Entertaiment Tonight, People, as if Kristin Cavallari is of interest to anyone anywhere, or her weight gain is of interest to anyone everywhere, especailly when her weight gain is hardly weight gain, but rather a fitness body in her divorce..

You’d think her even sayng that would get her cancelled from the actual fat chicks out there who hate skinny bitches….but instead….they celebrate her for some weird reason.

It’s like some people are just fodder for the tabloids and I guess she’s one of them, because she really is an insignificant nobody who just happened to use her low level celebrity to marry a pro athlete that will guarantee her and her kids have that OC life….

There is NO reason anyone should are, or talk about Cavallari, unless it’s about her mom tits, that I think are fake tits, or her ass that I’m surprised isn’t on OnlyFans as she clearly shows it off because she finds it hot.

The whole point is, Kristin Cavallari is garbage, but her “fat ass” from her weight gain’s alright, but let’s not let the media feed her ego too much, it’s not THAT good, it’s OLD and probably smells like old basement…as old PUSSY tends to…..even when it’s rich and can afford all the lotions.

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Here’s Divorcee or Widow Kristin Cavallari looking like she found the instagram filter, because her face looks super imposed on her body, like so many instagram trash I’ve come across, it’s like these bitches think fake filters are an answer to getting glammed up, especially when they are old and rotten like this one.

It’s like why get hair and make-up to come, despite being rich as shit, I want my fans to think I’m low maintenance and hill next to my millionaire pool….since everything about me is vapid, Orange County, money grubbing trash.

So instead, they just try to game us with the fake face….TRUST nothing on the internet…and if Cavallari is reading this, which she’s not, but they do all google themselves, and this site is banned on all big tech channels, so she’d never find herself here…..but if she did and is like “jokes on him, I didn’t use a filter, that’s just how I look naturally”…..well bitch, I’m saying your face looks stupid, so for your sake, hope it’s a filter.

In conclusion, all the basic bitches of the world with egos and a dream, post instagram smut like this to show off their whore bodies, while pretending they are lifestyle influencers, even after being on TV, marrying a pro athlete and making stupid money…it’s like the worst of the worst are celebrated and they sure as fuck don’t shut up.

Anyway, here’s to old tired moms whoring….

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I have zero interest in Kristin Cavallari and I’ll assume you have zero interest in Kristin Cavallari, since we didn’t give a fuck about her when she was on TV all those years ago, at 20 years old…so why would a blown out, middle aged, mom, divorcee, athlete wallet fucking, Orange County mom, who pretends she’s an entrepreneur, when really she’s just a dick rider, matter…

Well, because she’s in cowboy gear and there is little more hilarious than rich suburbanites appropriating the cowboy look while being repulsed by the morals, values and ethics of a traditional country folk, who may not have designer clothes, or who may live in a trailer….but who have family that care for them and god in their life…you know….

It’s like any country concert that rolls through, there’s always the person dressing the part, the rich person with no identity acting like it’s halloween, and luckily, in Cavalarri’s case, she’s ridden enough dick to almost warrant being an honorary cowboy but she’s still corny as fuck….

At least the old lady tits are out for her BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN STARTER PACK smut but with tits, not Jake Gynnenhaal showing his faggotry.

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I did not give a shit about Cavallari back when she was younger and on TV, so I am not really into her now that she’s some MILF divorcee with a set of tits and a hard nipple, that is shamelessly showing off said tits and hard nipple, because it’s good for her social media ratio, building followers, working the algorithm, so that she can sell more product, since her hefty child support and alimony from fucking a pro athlete to completion isn’t enough, you know she doesn’t want to be one of those OC moms who doesn’t work and who collects the checks from their exes thanks to strategic work with their cunts, you know prostituting without the stigma, or the late nights on the street approaching cars and hoping it’s not cops, filled with more designer clothing, expensive homes and you just need one john dumb enough to cum in you to sort it all out and spin it like you’re not a whore…I mean she was on TV, so she can’t be a money grubber…that’s what they want you to think…or she’s an entrepreneur with a brand who you’d think doesn’t need to be a money grubber….yet for whatever reason, the tits are out like a money grubber….so if it looks and smells like a money grubber, we can assume that’s exactly what it is and exactly why the tits are out.

Shameless, shouldn’t she be at soccer practice or doing other rich mom shit, so maybe rich mom shit is about having the tits out….holding onto the ability to give boners as long as they can.

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Kristin Cavallari has a hot dog / hallway style vagina thanks to using it to breed athlete sponsored babies over the course of the last decade, because it’s easier to let rich guys cum in you to bring you the good life, than it is to do work or whatever.

She’s from Laguna Beach, but thought she was too big or too important for reality TV, so she ended up just being a cum dumpster, or breeding pig you find at the animal rescue after they’ve been used the fuck up and are no longer of use to said breeder. Only unlike the breeding pig at the animal rescue, this bitch collects a monthly check.

Sure, she can pretend to be an entrepreneur with a lifestyle brand like a mini Paltrow and I’m sure her brand does well, but let’s not let instagram businesses take us off course of her being a child support payment recipient.

Luckily, with money comes vanity and with vanity comes not allowing herself to get fat, so that she can selfie with confidence with her tits out, in an age appropriate one piece….

I’ll stare at the mom tits, plus we can pretend her childbirth was more a c-section to keep the cunt intact, as she knows her bank account may rely on it being in good working condition…

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I didn’t jerk off to Kristin with an I when she was on Laguna Beach, dipping a toe in celebrity before deciding being a WAG was a more lucrative option for her.

So I’m not about to jerk off to her now, Orang County Mom tits and Pilates body or not, bitch is boring…..

I don’t know if the homosexual looking man in the white sheer shorts, poking his booty out like he’s ready to be “bath housed”…..is her boyfriend, but she’s apparently dating a country singer who was a contestant on Survivor, two things I like, so maybe Cavallari isn’t so bad….but I’m not going to be jerking off to her bikini pics like she’s a middle aged high school friend on my FB a week after getting back from her CUBA ALL INCLUSIVE, because out of context, middle aged women are hard to jerk off to. They need that backstory, that connection to your soul, so that you don’t see them for the loose pile of skin they’ve become, but for the woman that they were when they wouldn’t fuck you at PROM.

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