Kristin Cavallari is garbage, but I saw some story that her husband is asking for 50 percent of her internet brand in their divorce and I thought how great a thing, since he probably financed the whole thing and might as well get his piece of the action, because even if the idea that women out there buy anything that this pile of dog shit reality star, who ditched the actual hit show her peers went onto do, because she thought she was too good for it and destined to legit stardom, only to become an athlete’s wife, like a sugar baby on the LA dating apps trying to get her rent paid, only able to play it in a better way because she had been on TV…..

Point being, she has her tits that I assume are fake tits out, being that Orange County rich and boring wife…but I’ll still stare at the tits.

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It’s Tanline Thursday!

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I didn’t give a fuck about Kristin Cavallari when she was on Laguna Beach, so I sure as fuck don’t care about her now that she’s some 35 year old plastic surgery ridden mom of a bunch of kids with some rich pro athlete, all looking like some Orange County mom who spends her day at spin class and the mall in Newport Beach or some shit…you know useless rich people in G-Class Mercedes living their own life of Luxury like all their peers, only trying to do it better than all their peers, and I guess Cavallari has the competitive advantage at her mom meet-ups, because she was on TV and the other moms all watched her in the tabloids making her king rich mom of the group….I just hate that vibe, it’s the worst mainstream shit around….but she’s in a one piece…an old mom with plastic surgery in a one piece…not the porno I subscribed to…but I’ll post it anyway…

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Kristin Cavallari Bra Top should not excite you, they are fake tits on a fake person, who only exists because 20 years ago she was on a show called Laguna Beach that took her to the top, if the top is pumping out a bunch of kids with a pro athlete husband, which to some people it is….the American Dream or some shit…

I see her as a failed piece of shit, whether she’s rich or not, but she didn’t sign onto the Laguna Beach spinoff, the more successful “THE HILLS”…not that I’ve seen any of these shows, but I know this one’s backstory because she is just that old….

So bitch thought she was too good for The Hills, didn’t land any other work, and in the end, just used her vagina as a cash register, or would that be an ATM…..because with the right rich fuck, making babies is money…as is marrying him for his money and when you have reality show fame, idiots can get easily won over thinking they are with someone important, when she’s trash…

Basically what I am saying is that I didnt’ give a fuck about this girl when she was 25, so I sure as fuck don’t care when she’s 35, even if her tits are only a few years old and she’s some horny divorcee basically internet screaming for validation, likes, follows, etc….all while not releasing a sex tape, because she’s married rich and doesn’t need that shit….so instead we get this muppety photoshopped garbage she’s probably using to promote her shitty fast fashion clothing line because you’re no one until you have some garbage environment destroying product line to sell to the idiots who still think you matter cuz they loved that MTV when MTV decided to say fuck it to music and hopped into garbage programming like Laguna Beach…

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Kristin Cavallari is a garbage mom of too many kids who thought she was a fucking hero because she was on a successful reality show, but was too good to get on the spinoff of the reality show that was actually the fucking hit….

She was Laguna Beach, too good for the Hills, not that I’ve seen an episode of either, but I am a fan of Spencer and Heidi….they’re good people…not that I know them…but I like them…

So instead of doing The Hills, she went onto get rich Athlete cock, rook him in, marry him, so that she would be set for life…

She’s recently divorced, doing this second wind or second stab at her career in her 30s, where she’s doing the influencer thing, pushing products and bullshit and trying to be all California girl…with her tits out in tight clothing, reminding anyone of Whole Foods or Spin class in the OC…which I guess is a thing….and I guess despite thinking she’s old, expired trash, I don’t mind the tight activewear outfit..I mean it’s like jerking off to the mom at the checkout line….before being kicked out of the store for not wearing a mask…

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We can all agree that Kristin Cavallari is an irrelvent dog shit of a reality TV celebrity who is zero fucking interesting….in part because she was too dumb to sign onto The Hills which was a spinoff of the Laguna Beach show she was on….and The Hills went onto be a huge fucking show, even a phenomenon….Shout Out Heidi and Spencers, who may not be friends of the site, but are legends in their own right because of it…and represent a simpler time when we only had a handful of famous idiots to make fun of before social media everyone a famous idiot to make fun of…

Anyway, instead of doing The Hills, she thought she’d make it as a legit actress, only to end up marrying an Athlete and having dozens of kids with him, and the whole thing is totally boring, the fact I know it is even upsetting, because I shouldn’t know who this bitch is since I’ve never seen an episode of either show she’s affiliated with…

But tits, or hard nips in wife beaters crying for attention in a car that alimony or child support bought, is enough to suck me back in…..I am really that basic of a man.

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Kristin Cavallari filtered the fuck out of her face for some bullshit video that she hopes you focus on her hard nipples instead of her filtered fucking face….since everything on the internet is a fucking lie and these aging or rotting, depending on your stance when it comes to females aging….trying to fool us with their BOTOX, with their photoshop and divert our attention from their weathered old rich lady faces….will not fool me…however I will still stare at the divorcee’s nipples since why the fuck now….

You see, I didn’t give a fuck about her during the Laguna Beach days, I didn’t give a fuck about her when she decided to do the whole acting thing instead of doing “The Hills” only to have no success, so she found some loser jock with some money and made him cum in her until she got pregnant…strategic family planning.

Now she’s getting a divorce, still trying to be hot, but erasing her face in the process at least on the internet since we don’t need movie magic to make us better people now, they come default on all social media apps to perpetuate more lies on the LIE machine that is the internet.

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Kristin Cavallari is on the prowl, I mean this is typical divorcee behavior where any girl who gets divorced after being with the same dude for as long as they were together, hits the scene running…

The story is that he didn’t want to be with her in the first place, they were on a break and she trapped him with a pregnancy that happened whilst on the break, only to force him to man up and marry her and be an honest dude, even though he was already done with her bottom feeding money grubbing, not even a castmember on The Hills because she thought she could be a legit actress after LAGUNA beach ass….only to crawl back on The Hills in their last season to remind everyone she existed because she wasn’t able to pull off anything after Laguna Beach like she intended to since there was hype around her, hype that got to her head….a TALE AS OLD AS TIME (the trapping a dude with pregnancy, forcing him to play house part – not the REALITY TV STAR THINKING SHE MATTERS part(…

So now she’s divorced or divorcing the poor sucker who was trapped into some bootleg life with some bootleg opportunist…and in being divorced she’s got to prove she’s got sex appeal, prove she’s got worth, prove that dudes still want to fuck her, all while giving herself more hype and media attention so she can help build her brand of clothing no one asked for….but that is her personal brand.

She’s a garbage money grubbing athlete trapper, but these tits are big, cleavage is big, doing that “revenge” hotness thing right….all horny for new dick to piss off the old dick or whatever…I don’t know why I even know any of this about Kirstin Cavallari, it’s more a testament to how pathetic my own life is than how hot her tits look.

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