Surfer Anastasia Ashley, who as far as I’m concerned not because of her surfing, even though she’s been competing for the last 20 years, because let’s face girls can’t be athletes, we only allow that because lesbians complain when girls aren’t allowed in the country clubs, taverns, etc, so to shut them up, we gave them their own league….

The benefit of their own league, at least in sports that don’t require a dick sized clot, like pro body building, or WNBA, or really anything that a bitch needs to be large as fuck….I am talking sports like tennis, figure skating, even gymnastics and Beach volleyball, and I guess now surfing, if that’s even really a sport, rather than just an excuse to hang on the beach all day and tan….is that the girls are fit..and a fit body, especially booty, is the one thing that everyone can appreciate…and the only thing that really counts when it comes to female athletes….I mean how can you get excited when a bitch breaks a record, when that record doesn’t even come close to records dude broke 5 decades earlier…even just saying “female athlete” makes me laugh…I prefer hot body that does sports and gets paid because we’re equal opportunity…

That said, since I don’t care about surfing, Anastasia is best known for her warm-up twerk video and she’s got fans because she’s got a round ass that someone has told her one too many times is amazing….because she keeps posting it…she is always in a bikini…a skimpy bikini…but not in a slutty way…but in a “I’m just going to work” way…and as far as I’m concerned…that’s hotter than all the obvious attention seeking sluts who don’t have any real skill, or ability to really do much more than duck face in selfies….

This video is probably some of her best work, and I’m not just saying that because I am the one who shot it…because I am the one who shot it…oh wait..that’s exactly why I think it’s her best video…because good ass or not…it is all about me….and my iPhone cameraman pervert skills….

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Anastasia Ashley is some accomplished pro-surfer, whatever the fuck that means, who apparently has been told by enough dudes that she’s got a above average fit ass while in her bikini…an ass that she obviously thinks is awesome because she seems to do more ass than surfing….from twerking at surf events to posting tons of ass pics on her instagram …

Luckily, I don’t give a fuck about surfing, unless it is on my dick and/or face…but I do care about ass…so it works for me…unfortunately she doesn’t…because if she did, her first job would be letting me try to get her pregnant…with my mouth….

Either way, she did a bikini fashion shoot for Purple that was shot by the amazing and beautiful Andi Elloway …who should have also been in this shoot in her bikini, turning this fashion porn into some lesbian themed porn….

But instead it was all Anastasia…fuck her for taking all the attention..no wait just fuck her…literally…but romantically and passionately with her all locked in a cage in my basement, as I stare in her starving cuz I haven’t fed her eyes, before spitting in her face and choking her out, as my dick slides in and out of her ass during a herpes outbreak…you know my kind of romance the real kind…

Let’s just hope when she’s googles herself and sees this post about her…and gets turned on instead of a restraining order…

Cuz I am in love with this bitch and pretty much ready to marry this bitch…and start a family with this bitch…or at least try to start a family with this bitch…over and over and over and over and over again…

I feel so alone.

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Anastasia Ashley is that whore twerker surf chick who got famous with her 5 million views pre-contest twerk some pervert who doesn’t understand the importance of twerking warm-up. I mean I think that is how Patrick Swayze warmed up on set of Point Break, but only Keanu really knows and he’d never tell his homo secrets…

Either way, people seem to care about her, she’s on all the sites, like she’s the next Miley Cyrus with a better ass…

She did some photoshoot for some magazine I’ve never heard of, she didn’t show her titties for fashion, I’m positing it cuz I’m riding that Anastasia Ashley wave, and I’m sure her 4 fans will actually care….

I’d rather be sniffing her wet bikini bottoms that gave her a yeast infection…

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Her name is Anastasia Ashley. If you’ve never heard of her, she’s a pro surfer I’ve posted on before. If you have heard of her, you know she’s got an amazing surfer ass, a surfer ass that she’s warming up the right way before her recent surf contest, that according to the internet, she didn’t win in competition but seriously fucking won in her warm up….a warm-up she twerked her way through while listening to her iPod while the other surfers looked on in confusion…a warm-up I want to marry…a warm-up I wish I could write a song for…a song where the chorus goes like this “do that warm-up on my dick”….it’s a work in progress, I’m not very musical…but it gets the point across….

This is amazing. Her ass is amazing. Her warm-up…amazing…all sports need warm-ups like this…all high school gym classes need warm-ups like this…all amateur and pro sporting events need warm-ups like this…hell all gym work-outs need warm-ups like this. It’s fucking perfect, she’s fucking perfect…

The best thing in all this is that I have a feeling she has no idea that she’s being watched, you know she’s a surfer and surfers just don’t give a fuck…I have a feeling she has no idea she’s being filmed as she warms up before the contest…which makes it so much hotter, at least to me, because I’m all about watching a bitch, whether through her bedroom/bathroom window…or in public..I’m a creep like that…a creep who needs more twerking in my life…

via VIDHUNTR

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I’ve been trying to convince Anastasia Ashley to marry me for as long as I’ve known she’s existed and started following her on the internet…unfortunately she never answers me…but the good news is, she’s hasn’t blocked me….not even when I threatened to kidnap her and lock her in my basement feeding her very little until she became to weak to resist my love…I mean there’s very little less romantic than that level of passion to break the laws for a bitch…But I guess in this generation, Romance is dead, people just want to fuck, and Anastasia Ashley is busy not fucking me..

But the good news is, I get to watch her surf videos over and over, pretending the wave she was riding was my dick…with her pussy.

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There is a pro surfer chick I want to have sex with and by have sex with I mean knock up so that she’s stuck with me for life…named Anastasia Ashley…Her ass drives me fucking nuts and need to see more of it…ideally dancing on my fucking face/chin/fingers….

I generally hate all the bitches I post…but surfers are cool shit…I envy their lifestyles and want to lick their salt stains off their skin like some kind of horse in the barn…. rockin bodies are my weakness…

The good news is that pro surfers are a little easier to stalk than hollywood trash with their big houses and 24 hour security camera….you know all I gotta do is ask my friend in Hawaii to hit the beach with a camera….take some pics…follow her home and I’m in….

Sure these pics aren’t tasting her pussy off my beard, but shit’s good enough for me….since I’m not in Hawaii….and can’t find whatever beach hut she’s sleeping in and crawl in bed with her pretending to be her loser boyfriend…who I like to think of as an obstacle between me and my new soul mate….you know since Lohan didn’t pan out….

Anastasia Ashley….we will end up loving each other when you’re gay looking boyfriend with his children of the corn Old Navy commerical hair fucks up…and he will…I’ll be your shoulder to cry on, and penis to not realize is inside you, partially cuz of the roofies…but mainly cuz it’s that small.

I love you…or at least love your ass….or at least love the idea of chipping my tooth on your body….just marry me already…our love affair has gone on too long….it’s time to

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