Anastasia Ashley is a magical creature sent from the beach, to the internet, via 1000s of bikini pics…who along with showcasing her awesome fit ass, like so many other girls try to do…is also a professional surfer…so she has a good excuse…and it also means she makes her living surfing…and that’s pretty fucking amazing considering how most of the world makes their living by not surfing but rather doing shitty fucking jobs that contribute to making some other asshole rich…

Well, it looks like Anastasia, as lovely as she is, has ventured out to start her own Jewelry line , and it’s safe to say that these pics are probably the bet way I’ve seen Jewelry marketed, not that I’ve ever seen Jewelry marketed, but you get what I am saying and that is that the Jewelry doesn’t matter…thanks to that ass.

See Her Jewelry HERE

See Her Jewelry HERE

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The paparazzi in Miami are pretty amazing. The main girl responsible for the off season “miami” celebrity bikini paparazzi pics is named Logan Fazio. Her ass is on the right of Anastasia.

She has basically created low level celebrities, using the paparazzi agencies to distribute her photos, and now she is taking it to the next level, by getting in front of the paparazzi while being paparazzi, only to create her own celebrity and when you have an Italian in Miami ass like that…you can’t go fucking wrong…

Now I don’t know what Anasatasia and her are doing, but I can only assume it is something sent from heaven to better the lives of all us perverts who are into nice fat assess in skimpy bikinis on the beach…

Maybe they are staring a girl group called the “bikini bandits” and this is them practicing their choreographed dance. Maybe this is the opening scene to a lesbian sex tape…yes…that’s what it is…because I’m old school and my lesbian sex doesn’t need to be in actual video…I can see it in my mind..

I guess the only fail in this is not enough toe touching….either way…Amazing….

I’m bummed I’m not here creeping on the beach, but rather on my couch in my own filth…because I could have been on the beach creeping…but chose to be on my couch in my own filth…

It’s all part of being a reclusive people…reclusives don’t go to Miami for bikini photoshoots…duh.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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It’s no secret that Anastasia Ashley is amazing. She’s a pro surfer who consistently brings her hot fit ass to the internet.

I’ve met her at least once and she’s been consistently pleasant, hard working, respectful, sweet, and friendly. She’s smart, she’s funny, she’s amazing and she’s living a pretty awesome and fun life. She has such a positive attitude throughout it, that when I see her making moves, and modelling for companies like REVOLVE CLOTHING , I fully support, encourage and even celebrate. She is hands down the best person I know.

You see, the world is filled with vapid, self absorbed useless, people….who don’t really grasp what’s important. Those people who get in front of the camera, who work in Hollywood or Entertainment…are just opportunists like Emily Rat-Cow. They suck your dick until they get what they want…then they disappear…as they climb the shitty ladder to a place they don’t realize isn’t even that special or important.

I don’t know if Anastasia’s level of amazing is because she isn’t a model, and doesn’t pretend to be. It’s not her goal in life, she just does it as part of being a pro surfer, yet she’s done work for all the “top tier” publications….She’s out to be a Hollywood starlet, she doesn’t even live in LA rocking’ the party scene to get noticed.. She’s just living life and people are drawn to her as they should be…because she’s not a sour bitch out to walk all over anyone.

She’s just one of the last few good people alive….in this morally bleak, depressing, self involved world.

I am a fan. She is a friend. So keep on bringing that ass to the internet. I’m totally down with looking’ at it, but not fucking it, because she’s one of the only girl’s I actually respect and I would never want to taint that. I’m more into sex with girls I hate or who hate me…not girls I consider my family…if you know what I mean.

Here are the pics…she’s lovely.

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When I think of a girl in Ghetto Juice, I imagine her in the grease filled back dumpster of a fried chicken shop with 12 black dudes jerking off on her face…right before eating some watermelon for desert…all set to the sounds of 3 fat white girls with 50 shades of grey babies from different daddies comes walking by, screaming into their cellphones about when they can start stripping again…while their crack dealers rap about crack….

I guess it’s also a surf magazine,…dream girl…ambassador of all things good in the world…living proof that having a vagina doesn’t ruin all girls…and that some can actually be cool as fuck…Anastasia Ashley…is showing off her fit, round, pro-surfer ass in…

Sure it’d be more interesting she was taking part in my version of Ghetto Juice…but this is Ghetto booty in a bikini being a swimsuit model is not bad either…

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Anastasia Ashley is more than just a surf booty on instagram, she actually competes…and that’s what I am watching right now….because girls who can surf always impress me but more importantly, look good when they are in a half squat and skimpy bikini bottom…doing things I can’t do….

The waves are shit, but I figure the best way to root for like her number 1 cheerleader I am…in her in her heat – is to stare at some pics of her from her instagram…featuring Ass…

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Surfing never looked so luxurious…here is friend and family member Anastasia Ashley on the red carpet and I think she looks amazing…

Sure I am bias, but I guess this is what happens when you take a bikini clad fish out of the water and off the beach or her natural habitat and throw her onto some red carpet all dolled up with flashing lights coming from every angle up on some paparazzi shit…and I think it couldn’t look better…it’s awkward and cute…honest and not attention seeking like so many other girls before her..

I also think it’s nice to see a girl you’ve seen in a bikini 1000 fucking times, in 1000 fucking bikinis, in some clothes, even though that is backwards logic…we normally want our girls less clothed than more clothed…but when looking at it from a sexual fantasy perspective of a muslim man, this kind of outfit is hot, where as a bikini is sending her straight to hell…

I guess what it comes down to is that whatever she is wearing, all you really care about is whether she can ride your face as well as she rides a big wave …and more importantly…whether salt water disinfect the places or creates a breeding ground for crabs…I’m not marine biologist, but those are craps I’m sure you’d be into eating….

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Anastasia Ashley is my girlfirned, she just doesn’t know it yet, probably because she’s too busy booking Carl’s Jr campaign and running off to Mexico posing her hot fit surfer body on the beach…to read my love letters…it happens with all the girls I like.

This is a video she posted of her jumping off a cliff, a jump I would try to catch her from if she let me be her hero everytime she falled, but apparently, she’s doing a good enough job being a hero on her own…proving, without even trying, that she is best there is, and I think it’s impossible to not get behind whatever she’s selling or whatever she’s about…because there’s nothing to laugh at or make fun of…there’s nothing negative or shitty…she’s just having a good time…and maybe that’s the lesson she’s teaching us uptight, angry, miserable fucks…just stop taking yourself so fucking seriously and have a good time…that or that surfer ass is pretty magical…

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Like Nina Agdal, Emily Ratajkowski and so many other it-girls before her, Anastasia Ashley’s hot surfer ass is being celebrated by Carl’s Jr, a company that by default destroys so many potential nice asses on a daily basis with the quality of their food, but it is nice for them to be aspirational and pretend…

There’s something funny thing about Carl’s Jr taking a pro athlete surfer babe like Anastasia Ashley, and filling her out like she actually eats fast food, you know like she was a Kate Upton, when you know by looking at her ripped 4% body fat frame in all her other pictures, that she probably doesn’t even eat actual food, she’s more of a water diet, even when it is organic…but it’s nice to pretend, when pretending is glossy pics of her amazing round ass…because fit or into Carl’s Jr or not…her ass is perfect…and I would eat that burger all day…whether it was showered or not.

If all fast food workers and all fast food eating customers looked like this, in their bikinis, I would probably spend a lot more time in fast food spots getting arrested for exposing myself and trying to get everyone there pregnant…with my own dried up, infertile thanks to alcoholism, complacency and broken dreams condiment….

I guess what it comes down to is that, maybe if she didn’t eat so much Carl’s Jr, she’d have more thigh gap and would look less like she’s trying to be a mermaid with her fat legs all rubbing together like they were a fucking tail.

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In a crazy, money and fame obsessed world, where everyone is out trying to fuck each other, or fuck each other over, for their own personal gain, every once in a while, a sweet video of a pomeranian and a pro surfer who you know for her hot ass in a bikini, comes out to remind you that the world’s not all that bad…even if it’s fuelled by fame whoring dogs and social media sites worth billions, it’s the #selfie generation, embrace it, have sex with it, because it is our reality, and sometimes things like this happen, and you realize, that it’s not all bad, in fact some of it is all kinds of amazing….

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In the event you don’t read the site…Anastasia Ashley, a girl I am a fan of….is hanging with the enemy of the site…pug faced Chrissy Teigen…

You see, Anastasia Ashley is a pro surfer/butt model who I praise on the regular…even though I generally hate on everything…because she’s managed to be one of the few things that has polluted my dead heart with her amazingness…She is something that I don’t hate and will never hate…but rather that I love and celebrate. Maybe I just like surfing…#beachlyfe…butts…Lymonada…or traitors…who hang with the enemy…

Chrissy Teigen…is the enemy of the site because she’s an unstable, drunk, internet comedian…who one year tells me she loves the site and this year next goes on a rampage hating me on her blog, turning her creepy fans on me…all for calling her out for what she is…or what she appears to be…a desperate hollywood housewife, who has gold dug herself into an ideal situation…where she doesn’t have to work, so she has plenty of time to play “pretend model”.. which is convenient, since no one has ever paid her to model… they are like “John Legend’s wife is eager and will do it for free, she has 300,000 followers, let’s use her, it’s a good ROI, she’s eager”… she begs, John Legend’s people beg… Everyone famous wants to be linked a babe with some level of babe association…like a modeling agency or published pictures…

I mean, I don’t know her finances, maybe she made 1000 dollars here or there, but her real income is 50% of everything John Legend has cuz she met him early on….and moved in on that hard…

The funny thing with her is that even with the praise of the idiots who believe that she’s awesome from everything they read and see, thanks to the media making her relevant..she’s still just a pug face who knows she’s pulling a scam. She knows in her soul she’s unworthy and she knows that she’s only relevant due to the man she chose to lockdown…

Even with the fans, people saying she’s hot, all the ego boosting her self esteem gets on the daily from witty jokes and her with free modelling …She is angry and miserable, drunk…who pretends she’s a bikini model because SI says she is one…when all I see is something old, boring, played out, even a little fat, tired and in need of throwin in that beach towel once and for all…

I don’t like her…but ultimately, I don’t care and she barely exists to me, even when she’s tainting one of my favorite things…but shots were fired by her…and I would have been nicer if she had a better attitude…she brought it on herself and I won’t hold it against Anastasia Ashley, because she’s still lovely, perfect, despite the shitty company she keeps, especially when that shitty company is the enemy….and that’s all I have to say about that…Here’s some Anastasia Ashley Instagram pics..to cleanse my soul…and to teach me how to love her again after this glitch in judgement.

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