I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Unsorted Category

2006

09

Aug

I am – Ass Video of the Day

I am a little disoriented today, since I don’t have my computer and can’t update proper. Most of you may find that kinda pathetic of me, but reality is that I believe that we should all replace one addiction with another. My addiction was drugs, liquor and women, and now in this time of sobriety and self-hatred, I have replaced those necessary evils with this shitty website. When I am not around it – I am thinking about it, when I am posting on it – I fucking hate it but when I make myself laugh or piss someone off- I am fucking loving it. Needless to say, I am rarely loving it, I am always hating it, and no matter what, I will keep on posting on it, cuz it’s really all I think about.

Now, that random non-sense has nothing to do with this post, but if you were reading, you’d see that I don’t have a delete button or backspace on this computer so I can’t go back and delete what I said. I would though, it’s a little self-righteous and embarrassing, I don’t understand why I put myself out there to be judged by all of you like I do. I guess it’s kinda on the same line as this fat bitch in a thong shaking her ass on video (of the day), is the story I heard. LOVE JESUS…

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

09

Aug

I am- AJ Mclean's 18 Year Old Vagina of the Day

Today has been a day for losers. That is because I have been trying to sort out my broken new computer and I am forced to neglect this site and use a really shitty computer at a really shitty internet cafe with no photoshop to make my sexy top of post images. I felt that since I felt like I sucked at life, I’d post pictures of someone who actual does suck at life and that’s AJ from the Backstreet Boys. Dude sucks so hard that they won’t even take him back, and when the backstreet boys reject you, it’s a lot like being un-invited to the kid with no friend’s birthday party, or like getting dumped by the fat chick that you were too ashamed to admit you were dating, just when you came to terms with the fact that you were dating her.I don’t know if that made sense to you, but the keyboard on this computer isn’t working so well, soI am not going to be editing any of this.

In trying to stay positive in life, AJ is not all that lame. If you ignore his horrible tattoos and think back a few years, we can all remember that he was the backstreet boy with a drug problem and a drinking problem and addiction is always cool. He’s also got a truckload of money and is now he’s slamming some 18 year old vagina, ten years younger than him, who is obviously using him to get to the top. What she doesn’t realize is that using AJ to become famous is like taking the stairs to get to the top of the empire state building. You’ll get there eventually, but you may die on the way.

In the event you haven’t noticed, which you haven’t, cuz none of you read my writing. I decided to write in cliches for the next little while. It will be like parking an aircraft carrier in a dixie cup. Laugh now. Love Jesus.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

09

Aug

I am- AJ Mclean’s 18 Year Old Vagina of the Day

Today has been a day for losers. That is because I have been trying to sort out my broken new computer and I am forced to neglect this site and use a really shitty computer at a really shitty internet cafe with no photoshop to make my sexy top of post images. I felt that since I felt like I sucked at life, I’d post pictures of someone who actual does suck at life and that’s AJ from the Backstreet Boys. Dude sucks so hard that they won’t even take him back, and when the backstreet boys reject you, it’s a lot like being un-invited to the kid with no friend’s birthday party, or like getting dumped by the fat chick that you were too ashamed to admit you were dating, just when you came to terms with the fact that you were dating her.I don’t know if that made sense to you, but the keyboard on this computer isn’t working so well, soI am not going to be editing any of this.

In trying to stay positive in life, AJ is not all that lame. If you ignore his horrible tattoos and think back a few years, we can all remember that he was the backstreet boy with a drug problem and a drinking problem and addiction is always cool. He’s also got a truckload of money and is now he’s slamming some 18 year old vagina, ten years younger than him, who is obviously using him to get to the top. What she doesn’t realize is that using AJ to become famous is like taking the stairs to get to the top of the empire state building. You’ll get there eventually, but you may die on the way.

In the event you haven’t noticed, which you haven’t, cuz none of you read my writing. I decided to write in cliches for the next little while. It will be like parking an aircraft carrier in a dixie cup. Laugh now. Love Jesus.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

09

Aug

I am – Nicole Richie Makes The Paparazzi Sing of the Day

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In continuing my quest to disappoint my 15 readers, my computer broke on me last night when updating. I feel like shit has been going wrong for the last 2 months, from cancer biopsies to stolen computers, to credit card fraud to buy a new computer that breaks. Meaning that I don’t have warranty on this shit and that I have to figure out how to fix it. That is what I am going to be doing today. Which means, no real updating.

Don’t forget about me, I will be back, it’s just karma for all the bad things I have done in my life. Whenever I am down, I like to rub one out to Nicole Richie, I like skinny bitches. The problem with rubbing one out when you can’t get it up is that it’s kinda like an endless war with my cock. It’s like going to an all you can eat buffet with the stomach flu, it’s like going for a jog after you just had your leg amputated. I am sure it’s like a lot better things, I am just not thinking straight today. This post is not funny. But Nicole Richie is.

Click the link and watch Nicole Richie make the paparazzi sing happy birthday to her hipster singing friend.

Watch the Video Here

If you want that hipster vegan lesbian singer/songwriter friend who they are singing for, go to her MYSPACE

I’ll be back later…this post really fucking sucks.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

09

Aug

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I didn’t update today. I realize that. I was at a hospital getting a cancer biopsy done on my nasopharynx. That’s where the nose meets the throat. I thought it was some routine bullshit that would be an in and out procedure. It pretty much was an in and out procedure, but I didn’t realize the motherfucker would be going up my nose with a pair of fucking pliers and ripping out the back of my throat through my nose 5 times. I am in pain and I am bleeding and the fact that I may have cancer fucking sucks, but I am pretty sure I don’t.

This is where I tell you how you should take control of your life, stop smoking, stop railing lines of dried up oven cleaner, stop drinking, stop eating fried foods, stop everything you like doing, because all things fun are bad for you. I’d say stop having unprotected sex, but to assume that you get laid is something I am not willing to do. I don’t like Fantasy. But point of all this is to live your fucking life however you want to live it, and if you end up 36 years old with a little lymphoma, you still got your stories…..

Speaking of stories, I was just at the drug store buying some shit for my nose, and the kid in line behind me was buying Visine and a box of condoms. I was going to ask him what his plans for the night were, but wasn’t in the mood, and figured he’d think I was trying to come on to him….

Someone who reads this site, is actually accomplished and wrote a book called Prisoner X and it is about being a writer for Hustler for 20 years. This is his Myspace and this is his message to all of you:

The Prisoner of X campaign is headed to the Pacific Northwest tomorrow and heres where the damage will be done.

Powells in Portland, Oregon, on Thursday, August 10 at 7:30 p.m. The address is 1005 West Burnside.

And then on Saturday, August 12 at 4:30 p.m. the whole thing happens again in Seattle, Washington, at Elliott Bay Books. Address? 101 South Main Street.

So go support, right after you click on my links for the day:

Add Me To Myspace – I want 1,000,000 Friends GO

Last Night’s Party Does a Pre-Lolla Party in Chicago GO

Some Girl Lip Syncing and Livin’ Hard, Half Naked, With Playboy Necklace, Only Fucks Gangstas GO

Posh Spice Shows Off Her Titties GO

Girl showing off her body in Booty Shorts GO

Denise Richards on the Beach GO

Young Girls Dancing Like They Were in a Music Video GO

Sienna Miller Upskirt, Nice Bikini Wax King Kong Vadge GO

A Few Party Hardcore “Episodes” GO

Some Baseball Wife Shower Her Baseball Diamond (SLASH CUNT) GO

Janet Jackson in Vibe in Bikini, I liked her better fat GO

Mariah Carey Cameltoe GO

A Little Booty Poppin’ Video For You GO

Playboy Playmate – Kendra Wilkonson GO

Lohan is Not on Coke GO

Me and Dominik at Charlotte’s Sweet 16 GO

Canadian Forces Fighting in Afghan-Land and it Makes Me Mad GO

Hot Fucking Belt Buckle of the Day GO

Paris Hilton Impersonator in Playboy (Naked) GO

Some Teens At the Gym (PORN) GO (pervert)

Last Super Model has a lot of Pics of Ladies and by Ladies I mean Whores GO

Bar Mitzvah Video GO

Bar Mitzvah Invitation GO

Celebrities Playing Table Tennis GO

Lovers Playing in the Water GO

Some Whore Bouncing Her Ass Around GO

More Young Girls Dancing Around Like They Were in a Music Video GO

This Girl’s Ass Is Gettin’ It GO

Who is Grace Jones and Why is her Shirt See -Through GO

Remember Jake’s Bootycall….Go Play It and Learn Something GO

Google Trends: Anal Fisting GO

This is the band I am stepLISTENING to – Right Now GO or on Myspace

Free Magazine and 4 DVDs for a Limited Time – Worth Checking Out GO

I said Add Me To Myspace – I want 1,000,000 Friends GO

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

08

Aug

I am – Emmalina, Internet Celebrity, Naked of the Day

Emmalina is an Internet Celebrity in her own right. She has been featured in the Washington post and is one of the top YouTube video makers. More on here can be found HERE. Millions of people watch her retarded videos, spoof them, and hate on her for being a cam whore.

I only heard of her yesterday, when I cheked my email and found a link to pics of her naked. Proving that she is a cam whore. They are on photobucket and the gallery will probably go down. I am posting all that I have on my hard drive….non-nude….in case bitch is underage when they were take, cuz with a name like DrunkenStepfather, I am sure the FBI are reader number 13 and 14, so no riskin it for me….

Now, I could go into how much I hate internet celebrities, videoblogger/podcasters. I could also talk about hown much I hate people who have readers/viewers because I have been trying to get shit rolling for 2 years only to find that I am useless and that I suck at life. Pieces of shit like Emmalina put little effort and become a fucking phenomenon. I like to think there is something wrong here and that something is me….

PICTURES WERE REMOVED CUZ GIRL WAS 13 IN THEM. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW. STEPFATHER DOESN’T DO KIDDY PORN

Get a Little Closer To Emmalina

Emmalina’s Nude Pictures on Photobucket

Emmalina’s Youtube With All Her Boring Videos

Emmalina’s Myspace Profile

Update ->

I found her pictures on Rapidshare – HERE FOR ZIP FILE

Also – Here’s her myspace message to me……

The pictures were intended solely for my boyfriend, thus making this none of your fucking business.

—————– Original Message —————–
From: DrunkenStepfather.com
Date: Aug 7, 2006 5:26 PM

how old were you in the naked pics of you that are floating around the net?

love

jesus

Bitch, should have been nicer to me. Never fuck with Jesus.

Posted in:stepFAME|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

07

Aug

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I saw some sleazy muscle man near my house trying to pick up a really hot girl walking by him earlier today. I was impressed that I actually left the house for a change. Anyway, this muscle man was like “hey baby come here, I’ll buy you lunch, kind of thing” and she walked off looking like she just got raped. Always a sexy look for a woman. Ten minutes later, I am walking by the patio and the same dude is giving the table next to him pamphlets on how to be a good christian. I think it was called “The Enlightened Life” or some shit. Either way, the guys he’s pitching his religious documents on were all shocked considering the way he tried to seduce the hot bitch.

I started a Myspace Group – I want 1,000,000 Members – I expect 10. This Is The Group Address http://groups.myspace.com/drunkenstepfather. I am not sure how you find it cuz that link keeps buggin out, but I have faith that you will find it because you care that much.

Either way, these are my links of the day, that’s the story I heard. Love Jesus.


X-Tina Rockin’ A Tight Upskirt for the Fans GO

Here are 5 Free Things From Dream Magazine GO

The Cobrasnake Did Lollapalooza Like a Good Hipster GO

The Cobrasnake Also Did a Lollapalooza Pre-Party Like a Good Hipster GO

Some Old Britney Rehearsing her Dance Moves GO

The Real vs. Fake Mariah Carey GO

This is Called Robot Liquid Dancing and it’s Freaking Me Out GO

Dirty Sluts Actin’ Like Sluts on the Beach GO

Morning Booty Dance Cuz When You’re Black That’s What You Do GO

Stepfather Approved Photo of the Day GO

Stepfather 18 Year Old Hipster of the Day GO

A little Paz Vega Handjob Action GO

A Spank Scene from One of those Porno Type Movies GO

Her Name is Peach and She is Naked GO

A Collection of Funny Random Web Pics GO

Jessica Simpson and her Black Dress GO

Ashlee Simpson’s Tight Upskirt from Last Week GO

Collection of FAT Amateur Asses from Brazil GO

A Little Lohan on a Bicycle GO

A little Britney Spears Preggers GO

A Little Weird Fucking Condom on Head Picture GO

A little Real Media Stream of Dave Navaro’s New Band “Panic House” GO

You Getting Laid Pays for My Servers GO

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

07

Aug

I am – Bai Ling Topless Screen Caps of the Day

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These are from a movie called Edmond. The reason I looked that up is because all you cunts rip into me for posting OLD topless pics, and this is my way of saying that I know they are fucking old and just look at them, you fucking cunt. I don’t give a fucking shit if they came out today or if they came out in the ’70s, because they are new to me, and this site is all about me. Having you 4- 12 daily readers is nice when I imagine our get together and realize how affordable it will be, but that’s not the point. The point is why is knowing everything about celebrity nudity your fucking obsession, and why do people like me posting older pics offend you for not being up to fucking speed. It makes me wonder what your daily life consists of. I am thinking you stay up late playing videogames, sleep most of the day, surf the net most of your evening, until your mom calls you up out of the basement for dinner she made you. After dinner you may or may not have cybersex with your girl who lives in the midwest, who you plan on marrying one day, and you are 30. Either way, this isn’t about you, it’s about Bai Ling and she looks like a fucking dude. I really have no interest in seeing her dick she calls her clit. I think hormone therapy is the thing to do if you are a small penised asian. That’s why trannies are huge in Thailand. Cuddles.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

07

Aug

I am – Kelly Osborne Hot Beach Pics of the Day

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At first I thought that Kelly Osborne was doing some Mel Gibson Nazi salute, but then I realized that that was way too much of a pop culture reference for me. I am not supposed to know what’s going on the world, my ignorance is part of my charm, so instead of starting a Jews starting the Third World War/ Terrorist Arabs suicide bombing all of us to shit debate, I want to focus on what’s important and that is that Kelly Osborne is a fat fucking pig. Now, I know these pics have probably hit the internet and all the cliche jokes have come with them, like “Osborne Beached Whale” or “Osborne Circus Elephant Does The Beach” or whatever those cunt Trerez Pink Hilton is the New Blog are saying, but what it all comes down to is the simple fact that bitch sweats chocolate ice cream, and when stuck in a car with broken AC on a hot day, she comes in handy. Since that won’t happen to any of us in our lifetime, let’s make some fat jokes…..in the comments cuz I don’t feel like writing anymore. This was potentially the funniest post of the week, and I fucked it all up. Typical.

Pictures Possibly From X17 (these fuckers send more cease and desists than you jerk off, virgin)

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

07

Aug

I am – Sex Doll Party Post of the Day

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When you are a sex doll, you need balance in your life. You can’t just be kept in the closet and expected to perform at your owner’s discretion. As a sex doll you need social time with other sex dolls to discuss your day’s activity and how fucking weird your owner is. These are some pictures of a sex doll party, I really have no idea the back story on this one, I can only assume it involves 4 lonely dudes, a chat room and an internet get together after months of talking to each other, thinking to themselves “finally, I’ve met someone like me”. It’s like when you walk by the park and you see the amputee picnics, or twin conferences, or the sci-fi club sword fighting in public places. It’s a great way for socially inept people to feel accepted. This sex doll party is same kinda thing, but in some dude’s backyard, cuz let’s face it, a park is not a place for a sex doll party, unless they have swings.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted