Miley Cyrus goes to church on Easter and these are the pictures. I am not sure if the blonde chick is her mom, but I remember seeing her mom in an interview once and it made me want to see the Billy Ray sex tape…but the truth is that I’ve always wanted to see a Billy Ray sex tape. That Achy Breaky Heart tune really spoke to me and I feel the only way I can appreciate it is if I see him hate fuckin’ a bitch after she tells his Achy Breaky heart and it turns out that Billy Ray was right and it just doesn’t understand and does blow up and kill a man…all over her face….right before she wiped it off and put it in a jar in her fridge in the event her aspiring country singin’ lover ever accidentally hit big and that is the story of how Miley came about…

Either way, I wonder what god is going to think of this good little Disney Christian when he finds out that Miley found a loophole and let’s dudes fuck her up the ass because that way she can still technically keep her virginity until marriage since that’s what the church wants out of her. I am sure he’ll be a lot less disappointed that when she realizes that church is a lot less fun than fucking, doing coke and being a total cunt to the world while spending absurd amounts of money on useless shit while the rest of God’s people are dying of starvation.

Posted in:Church|Easter|Miley Cyrus