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Archive for the Elisabeth Hasselbeck Category

2011

10

May

Elisabeth Hasselbeck in Tight Pants of the Day

Here’s a bitch I forgot existed…maybe it’s cuz I’m no longer a stay at home mom and was forced to go out there in the workforce cuz my husband went out for some milk and eggs for the kid’s breakfast and never came back…we filed a missing person’s report but he never showed up…the kids got a postcard from him, he’s living in Mexico in a Villa and has 3 young hot girlfriends and I now work at Walmart…

I don’t know where I’m going with that…but it’s got something to do with me making fun of myself for watching The View the last 5 years at the local McDonalds and thinking about the things I’d do to this bitch….even though her Football husband beat me to it….

I even remember watching her on the first year of survivor all dirty, unshaved, hard nippled, back when she was a shoe designer, and thinking about all the dirty things I wanted to do to her before the Star Jones and Barbara Walters beat me to it….

Either way, here’s some new pics of some throwback daytime TV pussy.

Posted in:Elisabeth Hasselbeck

2009

29

Jan

Elisabeth Hasselbeck is Pregnant Again of the Day

My neighbor just knocked on my door announcing that the ugly pussy on The View, not my sex Goddesses with a penis, Whoopi Goldberg or the other hotness that are Joy and Barbara who make up many of my sexual fantasies, is pregnant for the third time. This bitch is one of those religious types you see around who is constantly making fucking babies.

I thought she was just getting over the last pregnancy. How does a uterus handle that kind of abuse? Why the fuck is she so fertile? Is she trying to save her marriage or is she trying to lock her football husband down because she’s tired of him running around behind her back and thinks this is the way? Why doesn’t she take the load on her fucking face? Is this a tax write off, or maybe just a good reason to get paid leave from work when she needs a vacation…Does she realize what three pregnancies will do to her sex appeal/tits and pussy? What about the baggage it presents when she’s out shopping for a new husband when this one peaces the fuck out. It’s just fucking insanity, the world is overpopulated as is and her bringing more into this dying world to create garbage and mooch off our resources just shows how greedy and self absorbed she is. I think two kids was enough, give it a fucking rest, sure it’s appropriate for a cunt to make babies, but that doesn’t mean the whole thing isn’t disgusting.

That said, congrats, Elizabeth, may this pregnancy bring joy and happiness to your already thriving family, I expect you to document the entire delivery and sell the DVD and by expect I mean hope, because jerking off to you dilated has always been a dream, unless of course you decide no to go through with the pregnancy and need help “ending” it since you don’t believe in abortion, I am sure I can find a handful of people who would be willing to fuck the fetus out of you, while suckin’ your milk filled tits, if you know what I mean….

Now I have to go report my neighbor to my landlord for harassing me with such stupid fucking news.

Posted in:Elisabeth Hasselbeck|Pregnant

2008

14

Nov

Elisabeth Hasselbeck Talks About Her Milky Tits of the Day

I saw this clip of Elisabeth Hasselbeck on The View earlier today….they were talking about the pregnant man, who is legally a man, but technically a woman, because motherfucker has a pussy and uterus and gets her period and shit, and to me that makes him a her. I mean, If I can stick my dick in its bearded, mastectomy titty vagina, no matter how dry the fuckin’ thing is, or how much bigger his clit is than my dick, and bitch can get pregnant, despite the emotional and psychological damage it would do to me, she’s still a fucking woman. I don’t care what doctors or the law have to say about it, it’s just a loophole to get gay married….

Anyway, to perpetuate this weirdness of dude getting pregnant to be the father of his baby, the “mother” in the relationship’s been breast feeding the kid, despite how that makes no scientific sense, and Elisabeth Hasselbeck chimes in to say that when she was pregnant and saw other babies….she’d feel her titties fill up with milk….and that makes her a slut. A really weird slut who gets off on having random babies suck her tits, and I figured you’d like that because you are into sex offenders, since you are one.

Either way, here’s a song from Beyonce performing on Oprah, that she wrote for this weird extreme lesbian couple…..and their kid who is going to be totally fucked up when he accidentally sees daddy in the motherfuckin’ shower….

Scroll to 2:20, that’s how I feel about you…I’m doing that same gesture as I type this. Fucker.

Posted in:Breast Feeding|Elisabeth Hasselbeck|Tits