You don’t know who this bitch is and either do I, but the word on the internet is that she’s Owen Wilson’s supermodel girlfriend who I’ve never heard of, but then again, I am not good with remembering names or celebrities, I only remember vaginas.

The thing I like about Owen Wilson is that he tried to kill himself and failed. I always find failed suicide the biggest fuckin’ joke, not because I am into people dying or anything like that, but because you know when a motherfucker hates themselves so much and wishes they were dead and decide to actually go through with it because they are failures and suck at life so much and don’t deserve to live and end up failing at that too, it’s like can’t you get anything right you fucking loser.

I knew a dude who jumped off an overpass onto a freeway back in the day, his logic was that if he doesn’t die, he’ll at least get run over, but what ended up happening was two broken legs and few other broken bones and some head injury and no cars ran him over, and no one called an ambulance for him for 4 hours, because he did it late at night in some deserted part of the highway that no one was driving on and now dudes half retarded and has a limp and everytime I see him I can’t help but laugh.

I guess the good news for Owen Wilson is that he is lucky he didn’t end up dying and that he got a new lease on life, because it seems to be working out for him alright, this girl is much higher quality than that damaged Kate Hudson trash, even though the girl only with him because she’s using him to get her name out there because she knows there’s going to be media attention since he tried killing himself, and I’ve never been too worried about girls using dudes as long as they are putting out, because shit’s usually less expensive than hiring whores.

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Le Call|Supermodel|Unsorted