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Archive for the Push Up Bra Category

2010

28

Apr

Paris Hilton’s Push Up Bra Tries to Win Some Fame Back of the Day

The nice thing about these pictures is that throughout the night Paris Hilton’s face fell off while she drank and snorted away her sorrows…unfortunately not the kind of “face falling off” I’d like that leaves her in a ditch somewhere with some crazed lunatic running down the street in heels saying “that’s hot, I’m Paris Hilton, let’s cuddle, look at me I’m famous, I have hotels” or some other crazy person shit….but the kind of “face falling off” where she doesn’t feel like she looks her best so she cover’s the fuck up, a strategy I like to use on some of the pussy I have fucked, “yeah baby, let’s just do doggy”…..

Either way, she’s on her quest to get noticed again, she’s on her quest to get some of the attention Kardashian is getting, she realizes that showing some skin is the only thing people care about or want to see, since she started out as a pornstar and as Jenna Jameson will prove in 5 years when her addiction gets the best of her and she spends all her money, that you’re always a pornstar….and pornstars show their fucking genitals….or in this case their tits…in a push up bra…cuz that’s all people care about and that’s all she’s got to offer the world…

Useless fucking cunt.

The other nice thing about these pictures is that her friend was showing her panties….not because her friend is hot…but because her friend isn’t Paris Hilton showing her panties….since Paris Hilton panties are disgusting and classified a crime scene…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Paris Hilton|Push Up Bra

2009

16

Dec

Annalynne McCord’s Push-Up Bra for Cosmo of the Day

I was wrong about this Annalynne McCord girl. I was convinced her stupid bottom feeding show based on a shitty but popular show in the 90s would have been off the air and forgotten by now like it was the Knight Rider 2008 show, but it turns out that with all these specialty channels, pretty much anyone can find success on TV because they are so fucking desperate for ideas….

So I didn’t expect Annalynne to be posing for Cosmo, not that posing for Cosmo is a really high profile gig, but still a gig far more high profile than posing for escort ads at the back of the newspaper I woulda expected out of her, but in my defense, posing for escort ads is really the level of talent she has, the rest of the public just hasn’t figured that out….

So we’re left with this….

Posted in:Annalynne McCord|cleavage|Cosmo|Push Up Bra

2009

15

Sep

Rihanna’s Push Up Bra of the Day

Rihanna was on the New Jay Leno Show, which is pretty much the exact same as the Old Jay Leno Show, except that he sits on a chair with people like he was Oprah, instead of behind the desk. She was wearing Beyonce’s thighs, Lady Gaga’s Mask, Adolf Hilter’s hat and a pair of stockings she stole from the asian community who have been wearing ridiculous stockings since I got my first “erotic massage” and the whole thing was far more exciting than these pictures, which isn’t saying much because it wasn’t exciting at all. I am over Rihanna, but I can tell she’s not over me, just look at the way she’s flirting with me in these pictures, you know acting all hard to get cuz I know she knows I’m lookin’ at her in them…it’s all part of our bond….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:cleavage|Push Up Bra|Rihanna

2009

03

Mar

Paris Hilton and her Stupid Tits of the Day

Paris Hilton is pretty much over and done with as far as I’m concerned, but she manages to get attention by re-inventing herself with a push-up bra or a bra stuffed with a couple of those silicone inserts that make me feel uncomfortable because they turn me on. I guess she’s too much of a pussy to get real implants, I guess you become a pussy when your vagina takes over your life. If its not tending to the scabs and applying topical cream, it’s finding random dick to put into it and I figure if the whore wants to hold onto the attention she’s used to getting, she should just get a set of fucking tits instead of pretending to have one. Pretending just pisses people off, like the time I pretended to masturbate outside an all girls school on their school on lunch break and ended up getting chased by security. It’s like if I had just gone out and did the real thing, I coulda tuned on the awkward girl enough to make her my future girlfriend interested in further exploring my small penis, because boys she knows just don’t like her, instead I left with an asthma attack from running. Not that it matters.

What does matter is that I hate jacked up movie magic to make tits look like tits when there is no tit to begin with….

Speaking of the rich person weirdness, what the fuck is Ivana Trump into in these pictures?

Posted in:cleavage|Paris Hilton|Push Up Bra

2008

02

Dec

Paris Hilton’s Push Up Bra Magic of the Day

The single Paris Hilton is really out on the prowl, you know with wearing latex every chance she gets, trying to convince us that she’s this outrageous fuck, but like every slut who dresses like she’s in some kind fetish club chained to a fucking wall getting gang raped, she’s just fronting for the laziness that we’ve all seen and know, because she’s the kind of girl who loves herself so much, that she thinks just being present while getting slammed is enough fucking effort in making the sex a good experience. The truth is, a lot of people have taken her on a ride, but just because she’s got herpes, doesn’t mean she knew what she was doing when getting it, like this dumb bitch I know who got drunk and let her first boyfriend go down on her when he had a coldsore, not realizing that coldsores are fucking herpes and can scab your shit up and was now tainted and still a fucking virgin and who didn’t get it by being strapped to a fucking wall getting gang raped, like a real sexual liberated deviant who earned her herpes would.

Either way, she’s really got some skills in making her tits look bigger than they actually are and I guess that should count for something, even if that something is trickery that pisses me the fuck off because I like knowing what I am getting myself into, even if it’s in my imagination, because I’d never fuck Paris Hilton, mainly because she’d never fuck me, but also because it’d end up being a story that inspires an episode of CSI, because I hate her and hate fucking usually ends up in a crime scene, and I’d just plead self defense, cuz that pussy is a biological weapon.

Posted in:cleavage|Paris Hilton|Push Up Bra|Tits

2008

01

Sep

Paris Hilton’s Push Up Bra Hasn’t Died of AIDS Yet of the Day

Despite popular belief, Paris Hilton’s push up bra that makes her look like she’s actually got tits, did not die of Aids, but her dress is still the only pink thing she owns, since her vagina slowly weathered and turned grey like an old park bench that’s be sat on too many times…




Posted in:Paris Hilton|Push Up Bra

2008

11

Aug

Paris Hilton’s Got Her Push Up Bra On of the Day

I hate Paris Hilton, not only because she’s rich and tricked the world into caring about her up until recently, or because she’s a good business person and understands marketing or making money, or because she’s trashy and fucks on camera because most of the girls I love are trashy and fuck on camera, but because she’s just one of those people who annoys the fuck out of me and rubs me the wrong fuckin’ way. I figure the rest of the world feels the same way, because she’s hardly relevant anymore, her Good Charlotte sister, who will be in Montreal on Thursday and who I plan on egging on video, has a tight leash on her crazed vagina but unfortunately, whenever I see her pumpin’ up her barely there tits using a push up bra because she’s not into implants, I feel the need to post the shit.

I have a girl on my Facebook who has a profile that is pretty much identical to the real Paris Hilton’s profile, she included an AIM account on it and I decided to message her because I figured there was a chance it was her and I was pretty bored. After about 5 minutes of chatting with this bitch, I realized that she was nothing more than a 15 year old high school girl trying to be funny, mainly because she was smart enough to formulate a sentence, and because she knew less about Paris Hilton than I did, which doesn’t say a lot for me and was not a very proud moment.

I figured that since this bitch pretends to be Paris Hilton, despite being a teenage Filipino, I should ask why she tries to trick us into thinking she’s got bigger tits than she does, since I find it offensive, false marketing and it brings back memories of bringing home sluts with hot tits when I was younger, only to have been dooped and stuck with some A-Cups to play with.

This was her response as Paris Hilton…

because I am a whore

So since she’s the Internet Paris Hilton, I figure that statement is pretty much truth, unlike the lie that is in her push-up bra.

Posted in:Paris Hilton|Push Up Bra