PETA always manages to piss me off, because they do these great naked stunts, but the people doing them are always hairy hippie bitches with sloppy fucking bodies who make me want to go out and stop testing my cosmetic line on animals, just to make them put some fuckin’ clothes back on. At least today they kept their underwear on, because these pregnant lookin’ vaginas have already seen enough of the fuckin’ world, and should be underwraps. At least PETA calls them out for what they are…Pigs.
I ran into a girl who told me she made a point of watching this David Blaine stunt because she was convinced he was going to die despite it being aired on ABC, a family network. She told me that it was the biggest scam she ever witnessed and I figured I should find it and post this stunt that wasn’t really a stunt. The dude was supposed to jump 60 stories after being hung upside 60 hours, but instead all I saw was, smoke, mirrors and cables that probably weren’t supposed to be as obvious as a movie from the 60’s flying scene. The production crew was a little too slow moving to make it seamless as they attached him to the balloons he floated into the air on, and he just chilled out attached to cables at the bottom of the rig and the whole thing was a fucking disaster. I guess when you take a street magician, and give him the venue to come up with different ways to defy odds, he’s bound to run out of ideas or fuck up at least once. Blaine’s next trick….retirement.
This video is about as shitty as I feel today. Thanks David Blaine for giving me something to benchmark my unhappiness to.
I forgot to mention the Jimmy Kimmel announcer trying to cover up the mess with false enthusiasm….shit totally bombed and is a definite career killer. Let’s hope the girls from The Hills hire him as a consultant….
ANOTHER UPDATE –
Here’s a video of the paparazzi suckin’ Blaine’s dick about his shitty trick last night and Blaine offers an explanation as to what went wrong, and as expected, it was George W. Bush’s fault.