Upskirt Archives - Page 12 of 12 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

25

Jun

I am – Jade Jagger's Upskirt of the Day

Jade Jagger is the daughter of Mick Jagger and Bianca Jagger. She’s about 36 and I think I love her. These are pictures of her having a pretty weak upskirt that make me question why I do this site. I don’t understand why the fuck I bother writing posts about people I don’t ]give a fuck about, even though I’d love to stuff them like a turkey, but I do it because they are showing off a little panty. It’s a pretty fucking pathetic existence, because I would be a lot happier being out watching upskirts and nip slips happen in real life. Unfortunately, I am too poor and lazy for that shit.

What I am not too lazy for is harassing girls on myspace and facebook. Today’s question is when did you have your first orgasm. So far no one has answered me but 10 people have deleted me as a friend. I guess I am good at turning people off.

Posted in:Jade Jagger|Unsorted|Upskirt

2007

25

Jun

I am – Jade Jagger’s Upskirt of the Day

52 Comments »

Jade Jagger is the daughter of Mick Jagger and Bianca Jagger. She’s about 36 and I think I love her. These are pictures of her having a pretty weak upskirt that make me question why I do this site. I don’t understand why the fuck I bother writing posts about people I don’t ]give a fuck about, even though I’d love to stuff them like a turkey, but I do it because they are showing off a little panty. It’s a pretty fucking pathetic existence, because I would be a lot happier being out watching upskirts and nip slips happen in real life. Unfortunately, I am too poor and lazy for that shit.

What I am not too lazy for is harassing girls on myspace and facebook. Today’s question is when did you have your first orgasm. So far no one has answered me but 10 people have deleted me as a friend. I guess I am good at turning people off.

Posted in:Jade Jagger|Unsorted|Upskirt

2007

05

Jun

I am – Heather Locklear trying to Prevent a Vagina Slip of the Day

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Heather Locklear may be old, but she’s a good kind of old. She’s the type of old who has a lot of money and very little to do. I don’t think she’s been on TV or in Movies in the last 5 years, but for some reason is so vain that she spends her days with personal trainers and diet coaches to ensure that she’s still got some work in her. Maybe the reason she does that is because she built her career on being the hot blonde bitch guys wanted to fuck and got casted in whatever the fuck she’s done to try to lure in male audiences so we could tolerate her useless shows while our wives and girlfriends made us watch them. That pressure is a good thing, because she doesn’t want to retire and is maintaining that sex appeal. I guess it’s working because when I look at these pictures I get annoyed that she’s taking preventative measures to not expose too much….I guess what she doesn’t realize is that if a little panty saw the light of day, every fucking blog would be up on this shit and she’d be the topic of discussion at the water cooler in an office near you, possibly landing her the role of a lifetime.

I was at the stripclub this weekend because I accidentally joined a bachelor party that was walking by me while downtown. I was trying to get a few dollars to buy beer and they liked me enough to invite me along. They were drunk and when the bachelor got on stage to be humiliated, the strippers took all their contempt for me grabbing at them out on him. He ended up completely naked and I had never seen that kind of abuse during one of these shows. Dude was drunk and ended up pushing a stripper to the ground and running off stage, tripping, and landing on me naked. It was an interesting way to meet the guy I was partying for. Either way, there were 2 young chicks from New York there with their boyfriends, both were hot and part of the Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Lohan generation where being a slut is cool. They were so into the stripping that when my new found friends asked if they would give him a lap dance, they said sure. I ended up tagging along to the booth with them because I don’t give up any opportunity to see non-strippers in a strip club strip. I watched them dance around for 2 songs and all bitch did was show us her fucking bra. I kept asking for some nipple or ass and they weren’t having it. They were a lot like Heather Locklear holding back on all of us, and I guess the only think I can say is that it is a pretty frustrating and disappointing feeling. Cocktease.

Bonus – A Girls Aloud Chick Preventing a Getting Out of the Car Upskirt….and A Girls Aloud Chick Having a Total Upskirt

Posted in:Girls Aloud|Heather Locklear|Unsorted|Upskirt

2007

08

May

I am – Mel B Upskirt of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Mel B almost showing a post pregnancy upskirt, because she did just have a baby that she claims is Eddy Murphey’s about a month ago. Reality that her post pregnancy fat thighs rubbing together and not the gateway to her empty womb, like you want. I was talking to a friend about the concept of Fuck Friends the other day. Usually, the kind of girl who wants a fuck friend is not the kind of girl who gets emotionally vested in banging, which means she can have all the one night stands her heart desires while you’re at home playing xbox, waiting for her phone call to invite you over to bang, which she only does on Sundays or Mondays because those nights aren’t spent at the club….Or she’s the kind of girl who does get emotionally vested in banging, leaving you with a girlfriend after the tenth time you bang, or when she finds out you had a one night stand. All this to say it never really works out your way, because girls can get sex a lot easier than guys, and that is probably why Mel B doesn’t know who her daddy is, like an episode of Maury.

I saw these pictures without the upskirt shot at some point last week and wrote about a Spice Girls Reunion party or some shit, you can check it out HERE, if you have nothing better to…

Posted in:Mel B - Scary Spice|Melanie Brown|Panties|Unsorted|Upskirt

2007

07

May

I am – Paris Hilton Panties in the Wind of the Day

1 Comment »

I had a few funny things to write about, because the weekend is over and I was away from the computer for most of it, but I am drunk and don’t remember much. I ended up climbing up the fire escape of some building, and ending up on the roof with 3 bottles of cheap wine. I am not sure how I made my way back down, but I survived.

I am hoping that Paris Hilton won’t survive her 45 days in jail, even though 45 days is more like a vacation than anything for her. She will get special treatment and will probably have a nicer cell than my apartment, and she probably won’t be allowed to hang out with the lesbian muderers and scum that fill up real jail, but part of me really hopes she is. I also hope that she meets some whore that opens her life up to real crime, propelling her into a life in the underbelly of society, denouncing her socialite ways, because I am tired of seeing this cunt all over the fucking place.

Here are some pic of her panties, a little more clothes than the communal showers will let her wear, and this sentence is a fucking celebration, you just haven’t realized it yet.

Again, I am wasted and don’t know what I just wrote, but hope you aren’t wearing pants when you read it…because that is part of the reason I write this piece of shit site….Cuddles….

2006

12

Sep

I am – Lohan Upskirt Flashing Her Vagina of the Day

3 Comments »

I started smoking cheap cigars, because cheap is what I do and I was tired of craving cigarettes. I haven’t smoked in 10 months and think about it at least 5 times a day, every day. I don’t inhale these things, but the act of smoking relaxes me. That doesn’t mean I like sucking cock. I also drank a bottle of wine tonight because I like to pretend I am living large. After a sobering walk I came home and told one of my stepdaughters about my sex life before her fat mother destroyed my sex drive with her cellulite-ridden ass. I don’t think she appreciated the story of the 19 year old who I drank a 40 oz bottle of rum with and the proceeded to teach how to strip to her mix DJ tape. This was about 10 years ago. After an hour of her running around my house with her panties off and the last of the rum was consumed, I told her it was lap dance time. When she started grinding me and shovin’ her ass in my face, I couldn’t resist diving in mouth first. So the lesson of the day is that honesty is more effective with a little discretion….especially when talking to your stepdaughter about getting underage girls (in the USA) drunk and teaching them how to be strippers. Speaking of 19 year old drunken stripping whores, here are some pictures of Lohan showing a tight-upskirt in the UK where she leaves a restaurant called Cipriani to go to a club called Kabaret, where she proceeded to get drunk, high and pregnant with an AIDS baby that she’s going to give to Angelina Jolie, because Angelina likes Aids babies and Lohan has Aids, at least that’s the story I heard.

Yes – She’s wearing Panties this time.