I'll Make You Famous…

Archive for the Uterus Category




Lady Gaga’s Uterus Mirror of the Day

I was trying to figure out why Lady Gaga was wearing a mirror on her uterus. At first I thought it was to let people watch themselves going down on her, so that they can be haunted by that low point for the rest of their fuckin’ lives, but then I realized it’s because bitch has a fucking gunt/muff gut like a 45 year old mother of 4, because she’s a fucking vile pig and rockin’ a mirror covering the shit makes some optical illusion that distracts people from her testicles, but I could be wrong, maybe it’s just an annoying fucking fashion statement, like not wearing pants on a flight around the fuckin’ world, like a fat slobby motherfucker who hasn’t left his couch for 5 days and all it does is make me wonder why it real girls don’t dress like this, because it seems like something I could appreciate on the right body, but instead we’re stuck with the ugly ones.

On a sidenote, I wrote this post while taking a vile shit, because it only seemed fitting. Thank god for laptops…

Posted in:Lady Gaga|Mirror|Uterus




Jordan Getting Her Uterus Grabbed of the Day

So Jordan was out in some tight pants with her husband the other day and motherfucker grabbed her ass, because that’s what you can do when you own a bitch, even if she is the breadwinner for the household and actually owns you, it’s an animal channel situation, look it up, but I noticed that homeboy is doing a lot more uterus grabbing than ass grabbing and there’s gotta be a reason for that….

Sure in Jordan’s case, you’d expect him to be forced to massage her lady parts every hour on the hour so that they don’t harden, you know, since she’s one HPV outbreak away from a a hystorectomy, but I have a feeling she’s knocked up with another ball of retard mush, oh wait that wasn’t politically correct, I meant to say, special needs mush it is the new millenium after all……

It would explain her towel bikini from the other day, and that is a drunkenstepfather.com made up exclusive.

Sure I need to pass the fuck out…but how can I when it comes to such amazing news, sure who really cares if she’s knocked up or not other than the couples involved and child protective services and maybe Toys R’ Us for the potential income, not to mention all the doctors and nurses they’ll need to hire to make sure it survives developing in a pit of dry semen and period blood, but it’s a celebration never the less, so let’s give the lucky couple a big HOORAH you know, for their whole bringing new life into this cold dead world, even if it ends up a flipper, and cheer these cunts on as they ride their rollerblades, it’s like this was a 1975 10th Birthday in a New Jersey roller-rink.

Posted in:Grab|Jordan|Uterus