I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2004

01

Dec

I am – Terry Richardson

This guy is a great photographer
His pictures are my style.
He is dirty – trashy and likes nudity
He passes porn for art
And gets paid big money to take smutty pictures of celebrities for magazines Magazines… keep up the good work… you are doing a great job relating with today’s youth.

Check his site here

Side note..it’s too bad Terry’s platform was the cunts from Vice… That’s right Vice people…. no one cares!

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2004

01

Dec

I am – New Feature

It sucks knowing that I already posted this – but it was erased somehow
I guess that’s what happens when you rock a free service.

The new feature is the Friendster Message of the Day..

I probably don’t get a message a day, but we will pretend

I am a crackhead and will forget this feature in 10 mins anyway

so here it is:

Jesus Wrote:
Subject: You Like Anal

and I like you

————————————————————
Sophia Wrote:
Subject: Re: You Like Anal

huh?
do i know you?

———————————————————–
Jesus Wrote:
Subject: Re: You Like Anal

quit fuckin around
do you like anal

———————————————————–
Sophia Wrote:
Subject: Re: You Like Anal

dude, chill out.whether or not I like anal is irrelevent, unless I know who you are….in which case, you probably already know the answer….and who the fuck calls themselves Jesus?tightassholes with superiority complexes, is my guess.if you want a gape shot, you’re barking up the wrong tree.or are you?

I replied – but i don’t remember what I wrote
If blogger fixes it’s mistake
We will have 2 of this post
That’s fuckin’ porno!

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2004

01

Dec

I am – Jesus’ Baby Momma

I feel like a star… this is the first step to fame and fortune.
Julia – my future baby momma left a comment.

1 Comments:
At 2:28 PM, Julia said…
Whoa…I’m blog surfing and found this blog. I tried commenting on the “Jesus” post but there was an error. This blog cracked me up. It’s a great tool for helping me get fired. I’ll check back! Hilarious stuff! (the vibrating harry potter broom was awesome!)

Thanks for being here Julia….now send me naked pictures of you and your friends….

In other Blog news, all the posts I made after 1:30 didn’t go up, which is too bad, because i don’t remember what they were…

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2004

01

Dec

I am – Jesus' Baby Momma

I feel like a star… this is the first step to fame and fortune.
Julia – my future baby momma left a comment.

1 Comments:
At 2:28 PM, Julia said…
Whoa…I’m blog surfing and found this blog. I tried commenting on the “Jesus” post but there was an error. This blog cracked me up. It’s a great tool for helping me get fired. I’ll check back! Hilarious stuff! (the vibrating harry potter broom was awesome!)

Thanks for being here Julia….now send me naked pictures of you and your friends….

In other Blog news, all the posts I made after 1:30 didn’t go up, which is too bad, because i don’t remember what they were…

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2004

01

Dec

I am – Chicken Factory

I think this guy is coolshit.
People call him the UK William Hung.
Hung was a cunt and has nothing on this guy.
He works in a fucking chicken factory
And sings barbie girl like a pro….

He can also hook Clay up with some chickens…we know Clay likes that shit… I wrote something about Ruben being Fat and Black and loving his friend chicken and tequila thus making him a better American Idol to comment on.. but Ruben is going to die soon and Clay will always remain homo….

If you wanna see this barbie girl:

Check it out

Here

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2004

01

Dec

I am – Sex Toy For Kids

I don’t know if this is real – and I am too lazy to do a background check. I have better things to do like wallow in self-pity.

Check this out – The vibrating Harry Potter Broom for kids – Here

It is real, I had to make sure! – here

Someone told me that this was over a year old, I don’t really care because it is funny, But I guess I should make it clear that I am aware that this isn’t anything innovative. Fuck you!

I love the reviews:

Keep the batteries out!, December 26, 2001
Reviewer: A toy enthusiast from NJ

This toy was #1 on my daughter’s Christmas list. So what the heck, although it has no educational value I figured it would be good for imaginative play. It wasn’t until after she opened her gift and started playing with it that I realized that the toy may offer a more than sensational experience. The broomstick has cute sound effects and ***VIBRATES*** when they put it between their legs to fly. Come on—what were the creators of this toy thinking? She’ll keep playing with the Nimbus 2000, but with the batteries removed.

GREAT TOY!, June 11, 2002
Reviewer: Ashley from TX

My 12 year old daughter is a big Harry Potter fan, and loved the part with the Nimbus 2000, so I decided to buy her this toy. I was afraid she would think it was too babyish, but she LOVES this toy. Even my daughter’s friends enjoy playing with this fun toy. I was surprised at how long they can just sit in her room and play with this magic broomstick! A great buy for any Harry Potter fan! 🙂

Harry Potter Toy, Review, August 28, 2002
Reviewer: A toy enthusiast from Maine, USA

I recently bought this for my son, Vantro. He’s a HUGE Harry Potter fan. Seen the movie 32 times (in the theaters) and made the paper. This toy gives him the ability to fly around the house zapping things. My only problem I see with the toy is the batteries drain too fast and his sister fights him over it, so now I need to buy her one.

Excellent!, June 11, 2002
Reviewer: poola13 from Ohio

When my 12 year old daughter asked for this for her birthday, I kind of wondered if she was too old for it, but she seems to LOVE it. Her friends love it too! They play for hours in her bedroom with this great toy. They really seem to like the special effects it offers (the sound effects and vibrating). My oldest daughter (17) really likes it too! I recommend this for all children.


Update: I found out this is an old story, old like from Last Year old, not old like your prebubescent sister…oh wait that would be young..

you know what i mean…i am not down with internet

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2004

01

Dec

I am – Mermaid

Mermaids are rock and roll..

Here

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2004

01

Dec

I am – Google Images of the Day

Today’s word is Lohan (this is where i search google images for a word and pull up some of the results)

Lohan the Priest

Lohan the little boy

Lohan the No Fish Sign

Lohan the Pimp

Lohan the Face

Lohan the dog

Lohan the School

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2004

01

Dec

I am – A Cute Commercial

As a marketing executive (at least in my sexual fantasies) I have to say I like this commercial.

I find dogs cute
And I find dogs humping
Cuter

Check out the commecial here, it’s Fuckin’ Porno..

Now I have to get back to trying on women’s underwear…. yes this post was gayer than the guy who sodomized me last night.

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2004

01

Dec

I am – Personal Site of the Day

This is a feature on personal websites – I didn’t post one yesterday – because I forgot about it.

Today’s personal website is The Bexter Twins Here

Check out their photo album from their 18th birthday Here

Portia is a big breasted drunkard who can can-can, seen here

Portia is out of her slutty costume and just being slutty here

*Note: Portia’s man likes touching her cans…

(I had to say it because she has big boobs, and she does the can-can)

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