GET THIS SHIRT BECAUSE I LOVE THE GIRL WEARING IT…. The asian cashier at the grocery store is defying all stereotypes by having the hardest time counting change…she was like the one asian who wasn’t a fucking small genital robot when I was in a rush to get the fuck out of the grocery store…because […]

Some annoying homeless chick who I assume isn’t homeless but just randomly screams at people when you walk by her asking for change…asked me for change…and I said..something like “do you have any skills that make me want to give you money”…thinking she’d do a song or dance…and she said that she did…it was sucking […]

In case you were wondering – telling a girl you wish you were her dad because you would have molested her usually gets a bad response…but at the same time filters out the girls who aren’t broken…and no one has use for girls who aren’t broken…because girls who aren’t broken aren’t as fun to fuck…. […]

I could write about squirting teen moms with shitty tits, or the dry bitches I fuck who are eager for very little money. I could write about my alcoholism, drugs, misadventures that are actually really boring….but why not do something good for a change…..you know to bring a human side to this cyberbully being bullied […]

My favorite thing about married couples is how hungry the husband is for new tits when he is allowed to socialize with his friends, instead of doing some bullshit Murder Mystery dinner with other couples. Everytime I am with a married friend, who is allowed off his chain, it is always “let’s go to strippers” […]

Sometimes, you just gotta go for what you want, no matter how disgusting it is, no matter who’s looking, judging, pointing and laughing, and gagging or throwing up from the smell. That’s why I am going to go out right now and drink my fucking face off, you can reach out to me on If […]

The problem with making out with toothless, unshowered, probably homeless chicks while drunk…is waking up with a throat infection…and by making out I mean eating out. The worst pain ever. I may die from this flesh eating bacteria raping me. Remember me or don’t. Here are some morning links…. Take the Condom Challenge GO GO […]

My new failed pick-up line is telling a girl I jerked off to her instagram pics 3 times, then offering to send her the jar of peanut butter you came in when doing it. Turns out girls don’t like peanut butter. Here are some stepLINKS Jenny McCarthy in a Bikini to Celebrate / Mourn the […]

I’m drunk and trying to get phone sex….but I don’t have a phone. Story of my life, King of failing… Here are the stepLINKS…. Gee, I Wonder If Kim Kardashian Knows The Paparazzi Are Nearby (Cleavage Shot) GO Honey Boo Boo Is Doing A Whole Lot Of Hollerin’ Today GO Vertical Tango…. GO Giant Bikini […]