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Archive for the Jennifer Lopez Category

2013

01

Jul

Jennifer Lopez Performing for an Evil Dictator of the Day

The things tired “Triple Threat” Latinas from the Latina fad sings happy birthday to some Turkmenistan dictator Gurbledonguly Birdmanrishnakhov…why, because she got paid a lot to do it, and if you got money, honey, she’s got her dancing monkey shoes on, because you know that’s kinda the whole basis of her existence, and in these times of her not mattering anymore, she has to take any paying job she can get to feel validated and like she matters, unless of course she’s a spy, in what would be the most annoying spy the USA has ever created, building up some ghetto chick from the Bronx and making her into a popstar so she can infiltrate governments in her 50s, on her retirement cash grab tours…

Here’s what one report had to say…

The singer and actress performed in the former Soviet bloc country on Saturday night. A statement released Sunday by her publicist to The Associated Press said the event was hosted by the China National Petroleum Corp. and wasn’t a political event.

Lopez’s publicist says the event was vetted by Lopez’s staff: “Had there been knowledge of human rights issues any kind, Jennifer would not have attended.”
The birthday serenade was a last-minute request made by the corporation to Lopez before she took the stage, and she “graciously obliged,” the statement said.

I think the real tragedy here is not that she’s entertaining an evil person, but that they didn’t kidnap her and hold her hostage, but I guess that would go against terrorizing the world, since we would all get up and celebrate her absence…right?

Posted in:Jennifer Lopez

2013

04

Jan

Jennifer Lopez Pretending She’s not 100 Fucking Years Old in Harper’s Bazaar of the Day

Jennifer Lopez seems to forget that she’s 100 fucking years as she’s modeling, showing off skin, banging 18 year old gold diggers, hoping that wrist deep in her mom pussy will lead to rolexes, fame and all the other good stuf….because fisting is the only way she still feels….blame the twins….she does have twins right? I don’t fucking know, cuz she fell off back in Selena and I never got her hype, I just figured hispanic really like to endorse and promote their own…It is Friday Night, I’ve been drinking, I don’t know why I am posting this…but guess what…I am.

Posted in:Jennifer Lopez

2012

03

Jul

Jennifer Lopez Is The New Madonna of the Day

I call Jennifer Lopez the new Madonna and not in a good way, or as a compliment, or in a way to say 50 year olds really have it going on and can real longivity in their popstar careers….but in a let it the fuck go, give it the fuck up kinda way….

Jennifer Lopez is not an “artist”….who’s craft is writing lyrics to songs that come from the soul. You know like an old bluesman in a bar in Chicago or really anyone making real music for their lives…

She is a cookie cutter poptart who makes shitty pop music that could be performed by a hotter fucking version of her, and could be performed by a hotter younger version of her, making her as much money as she already makes by creating a new popstar….but she’s an ego and wants all the fucking glory….and that is an unfortunate series of events…

Let it the fuck go…..you’re not sexy….this is disturbing….


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Posted in:Jennifer Lopez

2012

26

Jun

Jennifer Lopez Unfortunate Bikini Pics of the Day

I can see this being a good ass if you were in some famine stricken country and in need of reproducing…you know you’d choose this pig of a woman and her fat ass to keep your genetics alive another generation…you know because she won’t die and has the nutrients to feed her baby all stored in her fat ass.

I was never a fan of Jennifer Lopez or her ass. I was never African enough, I just found it lazy and lacked personality….sure I love booty….just not this booty….especially not 50 after a bunch of twins….

She’s gross…..and in a bikini..


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BONUS (to some, horrible to others)- She was in another bikini/bathing suits for you die hard fans…click the pic to see her trying really fucking hard for the people and her tween boyfriend/sex object/male escort who should K-Fed her if she’s not menopausal…

Posted in:Jennifer Lopez

2012

16

Mar

Jennifer Lopez Titties in Red for Vogue of the Day

Fuck J.Lo. I hate this bitch and I have no idea why I am posting pictures of her photoshopped, push up bra tits…I can only blame my self destructive behavior and self-hatred….punishing myself by getting behind some over-hyped, underserving cunt, who pays people to call her the most beautiful person in the world….and by people I mean the magazine…and the whole lie is fucking offensive….I don’t see why she doesn’t just fucking retire and age gracefully, these old tired cunts killing it into their 50s….take your fucking money and relax….even if your egos and attention craving needs are screaming to be on stage….retire…we don’t want to fucking see your stupid face…at least I don’t…except when I feel like punishing myself….like right now….

Here’s the video if you care….and you shouldn’t.

Posted in:Jennifer Lopez

2012

13

Mar

J.Lo in Shiny Tight Pants Showing Off Her Fat Old Ass on Set of the Day

I find J.Lo’s fat mom ass totally uninteresting. I don’t care how much she paid People Magazine to say she was the most beautiful person last year when she was making her official comeback from being married to a horror movie character and more importantly having his devil spic babies…..

She’s old, she’s tired, she’s played out, she’s boring. If I’m gonna fuck with a bitch who has a set of twins at home in her 40s, I’m gonna do that in private, you know the kind of bitch you meet in a bar where old divorcees go, and fuck the shit out of, never telling anyone you know, cuz it’s not a conquest, it’s just pussy when you need it…..

Fuck J.Lo and the raft she floated in on. I hate this bitch and her shitty overrated ass….but here she is on set of some music video anyway….

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Posted in:J.Lo|Jennifer Lopez

2012

05

Mar

J.Lo’s Hard Nipple Bikini Pics of the Day

Here are some pics of some hard nippled J.Lo with her trophy rebound boyfriend trying to redeem herself for getting knocked up by that weird looking dude….while boosting her ego that she’s still got it cuz she’s J.Lo and can fuck anything….in some kind of mid-life crisis that I’m sure homie is appreciating….cuz J.Lo as annoying as she is is still worth a fuck….and homie better be hoping those tubes aren’t tied so she can be K-Fed…..if you know what I mean…set for life…..and he can pretend she’s the most beautiful woman in the world according to People magazine…..she does….even though we all know it was paid for…


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Posted in:Jennifer Lopez

2012

29

Feb

Jennifer Lopez Dykes Out For V Magazine of the Day

This is disturbing…but maybe that’s just cuz I like my moms of twins in their 40s to be keeping their boxing classes to their fucking selves and for their private trainer they have hired to pretty much double as their male prostitutes while the husband is at work….See I don’t mind fit girls, if anything I love it, not quite as much as weak, eating disorder girls who are unable to run from mee but anything that isn’t fat, sloppy or chubby, or untoned is good, even if it can kick my ass…except when it is J.Lo rocking Menopause and what looks like a tranny dick….doesn’t work for me…but maybe that’s just cuz I hate J.Lo..or maybe it is cuz I hate Tranny dick…that shit is always filled with AIDS, deep rooted issues, and makes me feel like a fag when sucking on its tits…huh? exactly.

Either way, here’s J.Lo in her diaper/menstrual belt for the weirdos into that kind of thing, while I go watch amateur porn to cleanse my soul from the damage this would have done if I wasn’t desensitized to all things evil the internet has to offer.

Posted in:Jennifer Lopez

2011

19

Sep

Jennifer Lopez’s Fat Ass with her Future Ex Husband of the Day

Who really gives a fuck about the relationship status of some cunt who has had far more success than she deserved, you know cuz she was on the forefront of the spic invasion of the 90s and people got confused into thinking she had a hot ass, when really it was just fat…..

Oh right, every white trash, pathetic loser, living the middle class boring life, you turn to this celeb bullshit to distract you from the tuna casserole you are making your ungrateful, talentless, leeching children…

She is People’s Most beautiful person, afterall….even if it was paid for it’s gotta count for something….

Posted in:Jennifer Lopez