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Archive for the Plastic Surgery Category

2010

23

Apr

The New Heidi Montag’s Promo Pics of the Day

I don’t know why this cunt has Promo Pics. I guess it’s for her fantasy music career. When really her only celebrity is her trying to be a fucking celebrity. The good news is that Hollywood destroyed her small town Colorodo soul, and turned her into a fucking insecure, attention seeking, robot….and the better news is that the bitch is going to not be remembered in 5 years from now. Now, I’m not sure I’ll be alive in 5 years to see it, but at least I can die happy knowing that she’s fucking done…

Here are her new tits, new face, new everything trying pretty fucking hard and failing….cuz failure is porn to me…and fake tits are porn to you…because you’re a fucking loser.

Posted in:Heidi Montag|Plastic Surgery|Promo Pics

2010

18

Mar

Heidi MOntag’s New Body Still Sweats of the Day

I am going to admit that Heidi Montag looks substantially better than she used to look, but seriously, that’s not saying much because her horse face and shitty ass wasn’t much to jerk off to, although, I’m sure at least one of you did jerk off to it. You sick fucks…

I guess she just proves to little girls everywhere and their parents who fear they will grow up to be ugly, that all it takes is a little money to sort yourself out.

Sure, part of me hates this attention whore and her bullshit in everything she does for attention, whether it’s being a virgin, being a christian or hiring a psychic manager, but the rest of me doesn’t give a fuck or really let Heidi Montag come into my daily thoughts….

So here is her pig attitude with her pig face sweating like a pig….lookin’ better than ever as her career that isn’t even a career slowly fades into a stripper pole back in her hometown…It’s nice to watch Hollywood suck people in, chew them up and spit them out. I’m ready for this one.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Heidi Montag|Plastic Surgery|Sweat

2010

20

Jan

Heidi Montag and Her Triple D Tits Final Cry for Attention of the DAy



I didn’t want to bother writing about Heidi Montag’s plastic surgery because I knew it was her final publicity stunt before pretty much fading away into obscurity thanks to The Hills being replaced by Jersey Shore. I wanted to ignore her cuz I’ve given her too much attention…

See a few weeks ago, I noticed that Heidi and Spencer added me to twitter, despite me not bothering following them, so I wanted to check in and see what the fuck the deal was, and it turned out they were following 1000s of people in a desperate attempt to get more people behind them, but no one even care, so I smiled knowing they were done and went with my useless day….

Then this story of 10 surgeries, one asshole husband I fucking hate, a failed self-produced pop album she spent all her money on in some ill-advised strategy, some labia reduction surgery, a few new DDD bras and an insecure, useless bitch and I figured bitch has a little more fight in her….and sure she looks a little better…giving horse-headed whores everywhere hope, but I know this is just the beginning of her becoming one of those vile plastic surgery freaks I see in porn, at strip clubs or in pictures in rich Jewish households, and the whole thing is fucking funny to me….but not as funny as watching her new face struggle to talk in this video People Magazine produced….if you haven’t already seen it…

Watch The Video
GO

Posted in:Heidi Montag|Plastic Surgery|Triple D

2009

21

Oct

The Catwoman Jocelyn Wildenstein Showing Off Her Tits of the Day

You know Jocelyn Wildenstein as the woman who has had tons of plastic surgery to make herself look like a cat. She is a socialite who is married to some art dealing billionaire because he’s a billionaire and girls love money and I guess his money didn’t buy happiness, but instead bought her numerous plastic surgeries because she clearly has a serious mental illness, cuz she is trying to make herself look like a fucking cat and I am sure the husband doesn’t care cuz he’s either fucking other chicks, or considering he’s into that whole art thing, other men and just finances this shit to shut her the fuck up…..and to leave him alone….

I guess she’s realized that there’s more to beauty than spending her husbands money on operations, because here she is showing off her tits while working out with weights on her arms and legs, so I guess we can’t hate her for her weirdness, but should appreciate her for not being fat, not to mention fucking her face is probably less dangerous than the time my friend tried fucking an alley cat’s face and motherfucker attacked his dick like it was a mouse or some shit, not that that has anything to do with pretty much anything….and the real issue at hand is why the fuck I did a post on this bitch….I guess it had to do with her tits…cuz sometimes tits are all I need to justify my actions….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Catwoman|Jocelyn Wildenstein|Plastic Surgery|Tits

2009

27

Aug

Joan Rivers Risks Melting in the Sun of the Day

Sometimes when I am in bed late at night, I lay there thinking that if Joan Rivers’ face looks like this….what could her pussy possibly look like…is it made of plastic, or a rubber insert, or is it the original model she was born with, that’s had no work done to it and is riped like the old peach I found behind my kitchen table last week and I don’t even eat peaches. Shit was so rotten, it was just a dried up shell…there was no moisture or smell, just death…..and I guess I will never know the answer….

Posted in:Joan Rivers|Plastic Surgery

2009

19

May

Hayden Panettiere’s Bikini is on a Boat With Some Plastic Bitches of the Day

Hayden Panettiere looks pretty good when thrown on a boat with a bunch of old rich hags who are jacked up on Plastic Surgery and look like annoying cunts to be around. She should do it more often because youth is a pretty magical thing, when on a boat with a bunch of vultures staring you down for still having yours while they try to hang onto theirs.

Normally this troll’s success and look offends me, like whenever I see ugly chicks think they are hot because dudes are perverts who are willing to fuck anything and they let it get to their ugly heads, but in this situation, based on comparison, she’s got it goin’ on. Enjoy.

Here are those plastic bitches….

Posted in:Bikini|Hags|Hayden Panettiere|Plastic Surgery

2009

20

Mar

Nikki Cox and her Jacked Up Face Take Her Tits to a Basketball Game the Day


Nikki Cox is just one of those girls that is goodlooking, gets male attention, but never really feels comfortable in her skin, or that she’s really valued, so she spends her life insecure and jacking her face up with plastic surgery, ending up looking like a fucking clown that she things represents her true self, but more obvious proof of her self-hatred is that she dated Bobcat Goldthwait….

I guess she gives a good blowjob and here she is at some basketball game.

Posted in:Nikki Cox|Plastic Surgery|Tits

2008

15

Jul

Lisa Rinna’s Got Some Hot Fake Everything of the Day

Lisa Rinna likes plastic surgery more than most people and she still looks like a fucking monster to me, but seeing her tits busting out of her low cut top is enough to make me stare. Not necessarily the same kind of staring I do on the daily when girls in their summer dresses walk by me, or the kind of staring I got caught doing at some college after party I managed to crash a few months ago, that lead me to hiding in the bathroom closet watching girls roll through to pee, use coke, get busy with radoms and whatever else went on before I passed out and was found by some frat boy who tried playing the hero by getting rough with me before I sold him on the idea of putting a video camera where I was hiding because it would be good content, but more the kind of staring that happens everytime I see a retarded person limping around confused at the busy grocery story trying to use 4 year old coupons while buying their 3 bottles of coke with one hand down their shit stained inside-out pants, which has happened more than once.

Lisa Rinna is not necessarily a good thing, but is kinda entertaining when no one’s around to judge you or your freaky fetishes, like the week I spent practicing infantilism in the privacy of my own home. I was just trying to relive a childhood I never had, but quickly changed my tune when I realized there was no one there to change my diaper and I was starting to get a rash, making the whole thing pretty humilating.

Posted in:Lisa Rinna|Nipples|Plastic Surgery|Tits

2008

30

Jun

Lisa RInna Brings Out Her Bikini of the Day

The thing I like about Lisa Rinna is that she looks like she was in some kind of nuclear waste accident that made her look like some kind of mutant you’d jerk off to in one of your favorite comics, but the only accident that happened in her life is that she made enough money to pay a dude to mangle the fuck out of her face and body because she thought it made her look pretty.

It turns out that when she parades that catcher mitt face of hers around in a bikini, some of you fall into the trap and think it’s hot, while I just see an unnatural mess of a woman, but I guess if she puts that much attention into her appearance, she probably is good in bed, or at least has a pretty hot designer pussy, hopefully not one that she design, because based on her track record, what she thinks looks good actually looks scary.

Posted in:Bikini|Lisa Rinna|Plastic Surgery

2008

09

Jun

Shauna Sand’s Got Some Weird Nipples and Grey Vagina of the Day

I know strippers who have had many back alley implants done because they were affordable and because the girls were more interested in having big fake tits than not getting hepatitis, HIV, or infections from the dirty unsterilized room and over the years, there were only a few accidents, like nipples started to take on a new shape, silicone would leak and turn tits black and one girl even claimed her nipple fell off when she took a shower, which I don’t believe because she smelled like she never showered. But even when that shit was re-applied, it still looked better than whatever the fuck is going on with Shauna Sand’s tit.

I know, like the strippers I knew, her tits were the foundation of her useless career of getting naked as some Playboy Trash, because despite Playboy’s marketing ploy that their girls are classy, they are usually just big blonde gutter sluts livin’ on a trashy dream but it’s pretty clear that her career was one that didn’t pay too much because her tits look a lot like the bad haircut I once got at a Hair Dressing School because I had to clean up for a job interview, but walked away with a patchy mess that made the people hiring me think I was dying of cancer, a fate less painful than whatever Shauna Sand’s pussy died of.


Shauna Sand Sex Tape Clips Exclusive

Posted in:Nipples|Plastic Surgery|Shauna Sand

2007

20

Nov

I am – Ashley Tisdale’s New Nose of the Day

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I can only assume Ashley Tisdale’s mother is some hot slut who used her vagina to get her daughter into show business, because let’s face it, with that fuckin nose bitch was rockin’, her only real career prospects were to work at the cosmetics counter of her local department store, because people would trust her ability to help them choose a perfume, because let’s face it, bitch was made for smelling things.

But lucky for us, she’s pulled an Ashlee Simpson and got a new fuckin’ nose. I’ve seen her shitty Christina Aguilera rip off video where she sings badly about what he says and what she says and I just stare at her fuckin’ nose knowing that whatever he was saying, he was saying it to get the fuck away from that fuckin’ thing, because it was scary on some halloween level.

Social pressure of needing to be hot and in the spotlight takes it’s toll on a young insecure girl who’s trying to make her career pop and it has made her cave in and got a new nose because it was disgusting and needed to be done and all part of growing up in a superficial world and wanting everyone to think you’ve got it going on. I know that when she’s asked about it, she’ll say it’s gotta do with some deviated septum shit, unable to breathe bullshit, because unlike a stripper who admits she got tits to make money and feel hot.

Either way, I love insecure girls because they get naked for me without much convincing, they just like the pat on the back or cum shot stamp of approval because it makes them feel wanted and for a person who hates themselves, feeling wanted is important. Now the real question is why did she stop at her nose, if she really wanted to make her career last she’s also going to need a new face, new teeth, some tits, talent and a sex tape. I don’t respect this half-assed effort she’s putting in, makes me feel like she’s not serious and treats her career like the joke that the rest of us already know it is. Cuddles.


Related Posts:

Some Ashley Tisdale in a Bikini
More Ashley Tisdale in a Bikini
Even More Ashley Tisdale in a Bikini
Damn This Girl Likes Bikinis…

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Nose|Plastic Surgery|Unsorted

2007

10

Oct

I am – Jane Seymour Dancing With the Stars Rehearsal Pics of the Day

jane_seymour_clown_top.jpg

I have a confession to make. I went to a friends house and his daughter’s were watching dancing with the stars yesterday and I was in the other room, because he doesn’t like me getting to close to them, because they are 18 and I am a bad influence, but I couldn’t help but overhear the shit that was going down. Basically, Jane Seymour’s mother had a stroke earlier in the year and her favorite show was Dancing With the Stars, the UK version. When Jane Seymour decided she was going to do it, she told her dying mother who hadn’t spoke in months and her mother spoke for the first time since her stroke saying “YES”. So that inspired Jane Seymour to do the show and since the stroke her mother ended up passing away and she decided to kick serious ass on her show, because she knows her mother is watching her and last night’s tango was so meaningful to Jane Seymore because it was the one dance she was going to dedicate to her mom.

Now I am all for sob stories, I think it makes for good entertainment, but the only question I had was did the Dancing with the Stars producers pay for this bullshit story for the tear-jerking drama it caused or did Jane Seymore off her mom, she is Dr Quinn Medicine Woman after all, so that she could win points with the judges. The whole thing was pretty fucking suspect and all the judges were nice to her after her dance, because none of them wanted to look like heartless bastards.

I remember when I used to use my mom’s death to get me passing marks in English class because I was a Mexican immigrant I couldn’t really write much more than “MY MOM DIED BE NICE”.

Point of all this is to say this Jane Seymour bitch looks like a fucking clown in this outfit, she is 56 years old and looks like she’s made of plastic, but not the good kind of plastic, more like the pastic wrap I used to take off of cheese slices to tape to my dick as a makeshift condom…I’m crafty like that.


Related Posts:

Mel B’s Ass Leaving Dancing With the Stars Rehearsals
Mel B’s Tits for Dancing With the Stars
Stacy Keibler Thinks She’s Avril Lavigne
Stacy Keibler Plays Volleyball in Shorts Pictures

Posted in:cleavage|Dancing With the Stars|Jane Seymour|Plastic Surgery|Unsorted

2007

11

Sep

I am – Lisa Rinna Grabbing Her Tits of the Day

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I was never really into this bitch because she’s pretty unknown and I was too busy getting drunk and getting in trouble during the Melrose Place years. I did know a group of crackheads who were hooked on the shit but I did what I could to stay away because getting caught up in a TV show is almost as depressing as never having a career after a TV show. Either way, bitch knows what she’s good for and distracts us from her busted chpped up plastic surgery ridden face by playing with her tits like they are nintendo.

I just spent the last 20 minutes watching some hot chick in tight pants trying to change a light bulb in a women’s clothing store. She was standing on a ladder that didn’t reach so her attempt involved a lot of stretching, bending, squeezing and climbing up and down a step-ladder. She didn’t notice me watching for the first 10 minutes but as a crowd formed around me and we all watched her like she was a shitty adult soap opera she realized and wasn’t too happy. Some asshole tried to be the hero and went in to help her probably in hopes of getting her number while ruining it for the rest of us, but it was probably one of the hottest things I’ve seen all day and inspired me to get back to the gym to watch girls taking yoga classes because it is better than porn.

Here are Lisa Rinna Grabbing her fake tits pics while making sex faces, not sex faces I’ve ever seen, when I used to fuck girls would either be sleeping, or clenching their eyes waiting for the traumatic experience to end…not because I raped them, but because they couldn’t really stomach me.


Related Posts:

Lisa Rinna in a Swimsuit Pictures
Lisa Rinna is a Hard Nippled Clown Pictures
Lisa Rinna Tit Pimple Pictures

Posted in:cleavage|Lisa Rinna|Plastic Surgery|Tit Grab|Tits|Unsorted

2007

17

May

I am – Kylie Minogue's Breast Implants of the Day

kylie_minogue_breaststop.jpg

Everyone used to bust Lohan and Britney’s balls for having fake tits, but no one ever seems to bug Kylie Minogue about it. Maybe I am wrong and insensitive, but last time I checked, having breast cancer lead to free implants. It’s like just because cancer is attached to something it makes it okay and I think that kind of thinking is what’s wrong with the world.

Lohan and Britney are reported drug addicts. Everyone bugs them for doing blow or prescription pills or getting drunk every night like it’s a big fucking deal, meanwhile, every fucking 14 year old in private school is ripping lines of coke like kids used to smoke cigarettes in my time. When I was “hanging out” with drug dealers, most of their clients were doctors and lawyers and professionals because cocaine is expensive and these are the people who make society work. Doctors perform surgery on us and diagnose us for the cancers that lead to free implants and no one fucking complains about it, but the second a useless skank gets caught doing it, its a big fucking deal and on the fucking news.

This post is probably bad for business, so before it gets out of hand, I firmly believe cancer sucks, I don’t think anyone who has it or has lost anyone from it is something worth laughing at, I don’t think that losing your breasts and having mangled substitutes for breasts after suffering is funny….I also don’t even know if Kylie has implants, I was just writing as if she does because she looks so lovely in this little summer dress….That was the best kind of damage control I could do.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue|Plastic Surgery|Tits|Unsorted

2007

17

May

I am – Kylie Minogue’s Breast Implants of the Day

kylie_minogue_breaststop.jpg

Everyone used to bust Lohan and Britney’s balls for having fake tits, but no one ever seems to bug Kylie Minogue about it. Maybe I am wrong and insensitive, but last time I checked, having breast cancer lead to free implants. It’s like just because cancer is attached to something it makes it okay and I think that kind of thinking is what’s wrong with the world.

Lohan and Britney are reported drug addicts. Everyone bugs them for doing blow or prescription pills or getting drunk every night like it’s a big fucking deal, meanwhile, every fucking 14 year old in private school is ripping lines of coke like kids used to smoke cigarettes in my time. When I was “hanging out” with drug dealers, most of their clients were doctors and lawyers and professionals because cocaine is expensive and these are the people who make society work. Doctors perform surgery on us and diagnose us for the cancers that lead to free implants and no one fucking complains about it, but the second a useless skank gets caught doing it, its a big fucking deal and on the fucking news.

This post is probably bad for business, so before it gets out of hand, I firmly believe cancer sucks, I don’t think anyone who has it or has lost anyone from it is something worth laughing at, I don’t think that losing your breasts and having mangled substitutes for breasts after suffering is funny….I also don’t even know if Kylie has implants, I was just writing as if she does because she looks so lovely in this little summer dress….That was the best kind of damage control I could do.

Posted in:Kylie Minogue|Plastic Surgery|Tits|Unsorted