People everywhere assume that having a bunch of mexican babies would ruin your body, and by people I mean dudes I know who have fucked baby mommas. They have told me nothing really positive about the state of their tits, stomach or ass. They always justify it as an easy conquest, cuz bitch is damaged goods and desperate to lure any man willing into their single mother life of hell. The funny thing about Kelly Ripa is that she looks pretty tight, being jacked on speed and having a career that is out of control with bad sitcoms, bad talk shows and whatever other crap she does is that there is little time to eat and lots of time to run around. She is also on TV, and no one likes to see themself homely and shit when watching the daily show while lying in bed with your ripped mexican pornstar of an actor husband. The fact is that you can put a coat of white paint on anything, and lucky for us, bitch has a supportive bikini bottom, because trust me, if this was a nudist beach, she’d be dragging her uterus in the sand behind her. If you didn’t understand what I meant from that, it’s probably because you have never actually witnessed a real pussy, I mean the homemade pocket pussy is good times and all, but shit will never experience the effects of birth. Remember the only people who say it’s a beautiful thing are ladies, justifying to themselves why they destroyed their cooter. That’s my story.

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