The life lesson of the day is simple. Once you’ve completed a decade stint as a coke fiend whore-fucker, land yourself an innocent, hot, young, useless celeb who only got cast in films(slash)tv for her tits, knock the bitch up and make her your young, hot , useless celeb wife. Cheat on her and embarass her in public forcing her to divorce you, because that is the only thing she can do to maintain the minimal amount of self-respect she has left, but only do so when she’s knocked up the second time. You know that her hormonal embalance will make her come to her senses when it comes to poppin’ that fucker out, because no one wants to raise a baby alone. Work your way back in the scene after the pregnancy comes to an end, tell the bitch you’re sorry and that you fucked up, and welcome back your normal family unit. That’s the life lesson of the day. Not that it will matter to any of you, you’re probably incapable of making a woman fully fall for you. Come to think of it, have you even slept with a woman yet? Virgins get no respect, unless they are girls I drive home after swim meets, but I only respect them cuz they are 16.

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