I have no idea who all these UK chick are, but I do know that they are sluttier than American girls and I am not too sure why. My whole life I was told that girls in the UK are fucking busted like an old pick up truck that I couldn’t afford if I tired because I am a hurtbag, but it seems like I am wrong.

I am wasted right now and I fucking hate when people say shit like “I am so fucked up” or “I am so drunk” or whatever people say when they party too hard. I know that no one really gives a fuck about how much I drank or what I did but the alcohol is fucking up my ability to say anything worth reading. My shirt is wet because some Cha Chi spilled his corona on me….and that is going to smell soon because I don’t wash my clothes…

I guess what it comes down to, is that even when I am sober, my stories really aren’t all that interesting, but at least I am capable of channeling that shit onto the website for the 3 of you who actually read what I write.

As I do some serious soul searching, I will just throw these up for you to think about how badly you fucked up in life, because we both know you aren’t going to bed everynight with girls that look like this. That’s all I have to say about that. I feel like I am Forrest fucking Gump. Just a little fatter because I have no interest in running around the country but I will say that my cigar is fucking sexy and my best friend right now. LOVE…

Posted in:Bikini|Michelle Marsh|Miss Britain|Unsorted