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Archive for the Michelle Marsh Category

2007

19

Jul

I am – Michelle Marsh and Her Big Jugs of the Day

1 Comment »

Michelle Marsh

Michelle Marsh is the type of girl that most of you virgins out there would like to be your first. She pretty much fits the stereotype of standard beauty for young guys everywhere to beat off to under the covers. I mean really, you can’t go wrong with blonde hair, nice body and big tits. The only problem is that if, by some crazy hell-freezes-over-pigs-fly-in-the-air chance you did actually get her to be you first, you would probably bust in your pants as soon as you touched her tit, like when Forest first grabbed Jenny’s goods in Forest Gump.

Teenaged guys are the worst to have sex with, which is why I pretty much never fuck guys my own age. First of all they have no fucking concept of foreplay and just want to stick their dick in you as soon as their pants come off (maybe because they know they are going to bust a nut in like 23 seconds?) If you try to get on top, they don’t really know what to do and get confused (Yes, I’m a top). They hump you like a little jack rabbit, but have no real rhythm or timing in regards to the whole thing, finish at lightning speed and then pass the fuck out before you come back from the bathroom.

So yeah, to all you teenaged boys out there, I’ll stick to older men because I have severe unresolved Daddy issues that are going to affect my dating habits for the rest of the life, and you stick to internet pictures of Michelle Marsh and humping your pillow while Mommy isn’t looking. Deal?

hugs and kisses
Marie-Eve Martinez


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Posted in:Bikini|Implants|Michelle Marsh|Tits|Unsorted

2007

27

Jun

I am – Michelle Marsh Has Huge Tits of the Day

6 Comments »

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I saw these pictures of Michelle Marsh trying to cover up her tits while running down the beach yesterday, I was going to post them, but realized that I never break stories, no sites link me, so why bother rushing it. I woke up today and saw them all over the place, so maybe it was my big break, but I doubt it.

Michelle Marsh has retardedly big tits. I am not really a fan of huge tits because they are usually either fake and remind me of dudes who get off to Anime cartoons and those guys make me feel uncomfortable, or they are on a fat chick and fat chick tits are fat tits and fat tits are usually pretty dumpy. I also like living in the future, you know thinking about where the fuck things are going, instead of just enjoying shit for what it is today and every time I look at these fuckers I see a 80 year old woman with the biggest fucking hangers around. But I guess I shouldn’t be so against this bitch just because she’s stacked. It’s not her fault that she feels like having basketball tits is a good thing, and so do you and that’s why bitch has a career, so who I am to really say anything….

I was on the bus the other day because I take the bus sometimes when I have places to go which is pretty much never, but I was bored and thought it would be a good 2 dollars of entertainment. You see in the summer bitches wear less clothes and some days while lookin for inspiration, I like to get it out of everyday people. Anyway, this one girl, who must have been a stripper, but a bad stripper, because real strippers have black drug dealing boyfriends drive them around, had these insane set of tits. Her face was busted up bad enough for me to think she shoulda invested a little less on the tits and more on a new face, but that’s not the point because no one was looking at her face. These things were half exposed and everyone stared, so I guess if you’re a chick, you can get all that attention you’re craving by exposing your tits. It’s a pretty simple life lesson. You could also get attention by not wearing panties an short skirts, by fingering yourself in public or by talking about how badly you like taking it in the ass.

Michelle Marsh does it well, take her lead and send me pictures.

Posted in:Bikini|Implants|Michelle Marsh|Tits|Topless|Unsorted

2007

05

Jun

I am – Michelle Marsh in a Bikini By The Pool of the Day

67 Comments »

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I know that some of your fuckers are major sports fans because your lives are seriously lacking something and you like the distraction. When you are bored you are either looking up sport stats to bet on the games or looking up pictures of blonde chicks with big fake tits to jerk off to. The reason I know that you assholes like sports is because I get emails about how I don’t do enough sports content, but the blonde chicks with fake tits are what keep you coming back. I think Michelle Marsh is up on this shit and realizes that the key to her success now that she’s already showed us all her big fake tits is to hit up the sports market by wearing a British soccer bikini, because even if England isn’t your team at least you sports fanatics can pretend she’s into watching the game while drinking a beer with you. It’s got nothing to do with the fact that she’s probably already fucked 3/4 of the team.

If you’re wondering why I was never into team sports, it’s simple. I suck at them. I don’t understand wasting time trying to kick balls or shoot baskets or throw touchdowns, I think it’s a distraction from what’s important and that is getting drunk. I think that working with a bunch of dudes towards menial success like winning is just a way to trick yourself that you have purpose. Reality is that the local pick-up game doesn’t mean shit in the grand scheme of the world. That’s not to say that what I spend my time doing does have any kind of impact, but at least I am wallowing in self-pity while drunk, instead of tricking myself into thinking I am good at something because I ended up on the team with the Ethiopian dude who can run faster than a cheetah because he spent his life running away from Cheetahs who tried to eat him. I guess the other reason I hate sports is the whole gay factor of a group of men in the shower and slapping each other’s asses in a testosterone rage and there is the small issue with me not being physically fit enough to walk up a flight of stairs. Hard living motherfucker, it takes it’s toll….

Either way, Here’s Michelle Marsh Manipulating You in a Bikini.

Posted in:Bikini|Michelle Marsh|Sports|Unsorted

2007

21

May

I am – Michelle Marsh in a Bikini for Miss Britain of the Day

4 Comments »

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I have no idea who all these UK chick are, but I do know that they are sluttier than American girls and I am not too sure why. My whole life I was told that girls in the UK are fucking busted like an old pick up truck that I couldn’t afford if I tired because I am a hurtbag, but it seems like I am wrong.

I am wasted right now and I fucking hate when people say shit like “I am so fucked up” or “I am so drunk” or whatever people say when they party too hard. I know that no one really gives a fuck about how much I drank or what I did but the alcohol is fucking up my ability to say anything worth reading. My shirt is wet because some Cha Chi spilled his corona on me….and that is going to smell soon because I don’t wash my clothes…

I guess what it comes down to, is that even when I am sober, my stories really aren’t all that interesting, but at least I am capable of channeling that shit onto the website for the 3 of you who actually read what I write.

As I do some serious soul searching, I will just throw these up for you to think about how badly you fucked up in life, because we both know you aren’t going to bed everynight with girls that look like this. That’s all I have to say about that. I feel like I am Forrest fucking Gump. Just a little fatter because I have no interest in running around the country but I will say that my cigar is fucking sexy and my best friend right now. LOVE…



Posted in:Bikini|Michelle Marsh|Miss Britain|Unsorted