So some people love Scarlett Johansson and I am not one of those people. I find her annoying, sloppy and pretty much a waste of space. When I hear her annoying raspy voice when she’s in movies I just want to mute the shit and she always seems to play the same lazy slow moving cunt in every movie, because she’s a slow moving lazy cunt in real life.

I am not goin to lie, I saw Lost in Translation and as embarrassing as that is, it’s got nothing on her scene in her panties and despite her being the only real pussy in the movie, seeing her in her underwear kinda turned me onto Bill Murray as the only escape from lookin’ at her. All she has going for her is a decent set of fat tits, and that’s never really been enough for me to be a fan of anyone, but has been more of a justification for fuckin’ ugly chicks with big tits. The good news is that she realizes that she’s second rate and not all that hot because she’s getting married to Alanis Morissette’s sloppy seconds and I don’t know about you, but I know that sloppy seconds is a good gauge of the caliber of person you are. When I am aware of how disgusting a girl’s sloppies are, I never commit to that shit and that’s usually the reason why I don’t let them show me their exes because I can’t deal with the blow to the self-esteem it gives me, despite me usually being the worse of two evils.

The point is that dude was engaged to Alanis Morissette and that’s a whole lot more than a one night stand while drunk. Alanis is someone I’d ever get up inside and I have no fuckin’ standards so the thought of her dirty stink stained on Ryan Reynolds and dripping out of Scarlett confirms just how disgusting this slag is.

Posted in:cleavage|Scarlett Johansson