Scarlett Johansson Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2025

18

Jun

Scarlett Johansson Making Out with Another Man of the Day

Scarlett Johansson’s out there promoting some Jurassic Park dog shit that makes the studios stupid fucking money….

She’s doing it by making out with another man, who is not her husband…

We’ve always known her SNL cast member husband was beneath her, and that’s not because we actually think Scarjo is that important, but the world or the Hollywood industry has decided that she is, where an SNL cast member is in a different category, most likely a groupie who lets her do what she wants, some could call him a cuck, others would say he probably can’t believe his lame ass Harvard ass got with celebrity tits he grew up jerking off to…so being able to knock her up is a win for the nerd…

So girl goes out there and publicly humiliates her husband….he probably likes that…..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE DAY CLICK HERE

Posted in:Scarlett Johansson

2023

09

Feb

Scarlett Johansson’s Pretty Dumpy Looking of the Day

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I may have been confused or manipulated into thinking SCARJO was something hot back in 2002 or 2003 when she first popped up and was being marketed as the next big thing.

I didn’t and still don’t follow celebrity culture, even though I am the unofficial voice of celebrity culture from my ignorant soapbox, I know nothing about this shit…

However, I do remember when she had one or two credits on IMDB and looking her up to see that she had about 30 other projects in the works and even then I thought, oh they’re going to push this bitch on us, and they did….

It was a simpler time, we had less options and her tits were big, but I never thought she was as hot as they said she was, she never lived up to the hype, and she’s now older and dumpier and pretty fucking average looking.

She’s out here whoring some product line she’s likely using to make a billion dollars, since celebs know they are on the outs, so they are all launching direct to consumer brands like a bikini clad instagram model launching a bikini line, get that money when you can….

To think that her star power manipulates or inspires anyone to buy her shit is depressing to me, because it reminds me how the population is so fucking doomed, such fucking suckers, and will do anything they are told…

She’s in a tight shirt, you can see her titty profile, if you look past her old lady GUNT and the whole thing is really not hot, unless you think the fall of an overhyped, marketed as hot, celebrity slut is hot, which I guess it kinda is….

Posted in:Scarlett Johansson

2021

19

Mar

Scarlett Johansson Panties of the Day

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I can hate on Scarlett Johansson, but I think the best approach is to remember that she’s in her 40s, she’s a WOODY ALLEN supporter, she’s got that fucking horrible back tattoo, and she’s always been VERY overrated and undeserving of her position as the hottest chick, despite being dumpy, or the most cast chick, despite being dumpy….and it was just one of those marketing hustles they do to trick the easily tricked into buying into their stars…you’re simple minds and easy to convince of those kinds of things.

I don’t know why she’s pantsless, but those are some watermelon crushing looking thighs, and I prefer the Scar Jo of 17 years ago, because she’s really boring even when her pants are off….but AT LEAST HER PANTS re off…and I guess “iconic” to some of you fan boy fucks who bought into it..it’s not your fault…you’re simple…

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Posted in:Scarlett Johansson

2019

10

Oct

Scarlett Johansson’s Cleavage for Elle of the Day

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Here’s a reminder that Scarlett Johansson is overrated and not very hot. Not to mention any and all of her acting roles were the fucking same. If anyone tells you acting requires any talent or skill. All it requires is an egotistical asshole to believe in themselves, like they are actually acting, and basically shoving that down other people’s throats, like producers and casting agents used to do to her back when they decided to start the marketing lie that she’s some talent or some babe.

Keep in mind that this has nothing to do with her terrifying back tattoo…that I only found out about the other week.

This is all based on years of watching her suck but get hype for sucking…because the industry are fucking liars..

The headline or angle the public relations team is spreading out there is that Scarlett Johansson Is ‘Fulfilled’ With Fiance Colin Jost…

Of course she’s fulfilled, she’s scammed th fucking system all these years, how could she want more when she’s got way more than she deserves…oh right, cunts don’t realize what they have and think they deserve all they have…not once have I heard a woman say she got lucky…it’s always about how great she is at whatever she does…and that’s silly.

Old Lady trying to be hot…

Posted in:Scarlett Johansson|SFW

2018

12

Nov

Scarlett Johansson Got Them Titties On of the Day

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I find Scarlett Johansson so ugly…even with her tits out…in whatever this is.

She is old now….and I understand that in 2004 when she was first starting out, being the chubby girl with chubby tits in movies like Ghost World, she was exciting to the perverts…but the fact that people still think she’s hot, 14 years later is crazy.

It’s like you people need to find new pussy to obsess over, you know like Scarlett Johansson was once the new pussy people obsessed over, instead of focusing on the old shit….that is old shit…

So anyone still excited by her, and they are out there, I heard someone at a strip club the other day say “she’s as hot as Scarlett Johansson”…which to me translates to “I am influenced by Hollywood marketing and the media as a whole and I am so out of touch my hot references are in their 40s now”…

But she still got tit.

FOR MORE PHOTOS FROM THE PEOPLES CHOICE AWARDS CLICK HERE

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Posted in:Scarlett Johansson|SFW

2017

28

Nov

Scarlett Johansson and Other Sluts for Vanity Fair of the Day

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Scarlett Johansson is in a terrible shoot for Vanity Fair, celebrating how terrible movies have become, by featuring all the comic book heros from the movies in a shitty fucking photoshoot…

It’s too bad that comic book shit is all the studios make money off of, the same boring story, over and over again with some virgin loser’s idol…a character they grew up on resonates with everyone…while good stories of real human experience gets back burnered cuz movies are about escaping and theatres need to be filled..fine, whatever, I don’t care..

I just don’t understand why all these people look like garbage, even though we know they are garbage.

Not to mention Scarlett Johansson is not hot, not exciting, she expired long ago….but more importantly Gwyneth Paltrow is fucking vile…what is this bootleg shit? How are people into this… Makes No Sense.

Posted in:Scarlett Johansson|SFW

2014

19

Nov

Scarlett Johansson Monster of the DAy

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Scarlett Johansson made an appearance that I like to call addressing the fact that she was never as hot as the world made her out to be, and that her throwback to “hollywood glamour”, her PR Team spun for years, that worked and got her work, is really just a Mom heading to a PTA meeting after picking up the kids at Soccer practice and making them whatever Suburban families eat…

There is no Glamour, there is just a memory of what was, now that it is old and tired, married and a mother, and pretty much as boring as I think she’s always been, except when she leaked those nudes and got a guy sent to jail for it, that was her peak, not that people who release nudes should go to jail, I mean we need them, but because she looked pretty good nude, but that was pre-kid…and only for a minute…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Scarlett Johansson

2014

10

Oct

Scarlett Johansson’s Mom Ass in Leggings of the Day

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Funny. Scarlett Johansson as a mom…has less of a dumpy ass than prior to being a mom. I wonder how that happens. I assume it is the pants talking, or maybe she’s breast feeding, and burning thousands of calories an hour, I mean let’s hope she’s breast feeding, since her breasts are really the best thing about her, and the idea of being nourished by them, so that you never have to detach from them, at least as a grown man and not some lecherous baby that has ruined her…because babies are gross…even though I felt she was ruined years ago…and just an overrated face…

Anyway, here she is with her man…her ass…kissing for the paps..in love…take it in…and remember – that dude’s life, even if Scarjo isn’t your thing, is better than yours, because Scarjo could have 99 percent of people, but chose him instead…these things happen, probably very often for you…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Scarlett Johansson

2014

16

Jul

Scarlett Johansson’s Not So Hot Ready To Drop Porn of the Day

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I am not into pregnant chicks. I remember the first time one of the drug addicts I used to hang with busted out a ready to drop porn magazine that he stole from some magazine store and thinking to myself a few things…the first being “how desperate does a bitch need to be to be spreading her vagina so wide you can see the baby crowning”…knowing she probably made less than 1,000 dollars to put herself out there…then I thought what would happen if the kid found the magazine lying around when he was old enough to realize what the fuck his mom was doing…but based on his mom’s crackhead look, I assume the kid wouldn’t make it to that age alive, or knowing who his crackhead mother was….then I wondered…who the fuck gets off to pregnant women. I mean to me it’s the ultimate “off the market”…”I’m taken, used, beat up, broken, ready for the dumpster like this was prom” thing…The only person who could be into this, is some lonely fuck who can’t get a chick, and knows no chick will even let him knock her up. It’s loneliness and sadness that fuels him being into this.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

I’m sure the same goes for Scarlett Johansson. Her committed fans hate this. Her lonely and sad fans who dreamed of knocking her up love it….and I just think the whole thing is gross…Pregnancy is very rarely a beautiful thing to look at…even when it’s your own pregnancy….but I guess you can’t lock yourself in a basement for 9 months, even if you should.

Here’ Scarlett.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Scarlett Johansson

2014

20

Apr

Scarlett Johansson Labia for Under the Skin of the Day

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I think the movie under the skin was in reference to Scarlett Johansson’s labia hanging out of her…something I assume she’ll get fixed as soon as her baby rapes and destroys the rest of her pussy….

She’s naked, she’s on her quest to win an Oscar pre-Kid, we’ve all seen her naked thanks to the dude who hacked her computer and ended up in jail for 30 years because of it, one of those Jesus type Martyr’s who died for your sins, and by sins I mean, you desire to see nude selfies of Scarlett Johansson….that paved the way for nudes in movies…because even with shitty tits, that people love in bra because they don’t look like this, nudity isn’t a big deal…

I am not a Scarlett Johansson hater, I just know what’s going on here, and that is that an overrated “beauty” who is the same in every movie, is looking for that transformative role to get a nomination, because she’s decided to take time off to be a mom…and it’s getting done via nudity…and anything that involves nudity…is my friend…even when I hate it…

Searching for pixelated celebrity clit is more fun than searching for eggs on your easter egg hunt…especially if done at #church.