I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2015

30

Nov

Amy Schumer for The Pirelli Calendar of the Day

AMY-SChumer-1

Live action cabbage patch doll Amy Schumer, who has blocked me on social media, because comedians are sensitive souls who make fun of everyone, including themselves, but don’t like being teased by other people, because it hurts their feelings…

She was a rich Jewish kid, turned comedian everyone loves and I’m not a fan of her, but at the same time I don’t hate her or her success, I don’t know enough about her humor, it just seems like it may be a little low hanging fruit, laugh at the obvious, empower the fat chick…and I guess Pirelli, who have a calendar that has always been for models, at least that’s how they started many many years ago…when they came up with the concept for high fashion nudity for their calendar…but we can assume since there is no need for calendars anymore, just throw anyone in there…that will get attention…because pretty images of pretty people to hang on your wall just isn’t in…but making noise and supporting or empowering fat chicks is..

So here she is, with her face looking like a drawing it’s been so photoshopped and still not cute…with her fat rolls saying “it’s ok to be fat” and I am sure women everywhere are excited as fuck about this…in a “You go star”…way…but she’s just a marketer, marketing to that market the way they need to be marketed to.

She knows she’s disgusting, but even being as disgusting as she is, guys will fuck her…even when she was just a bar tender…she knows she’s only good at jokes to make up for being ugly and this feeling liberated shit may be an act, may be a who gives a fuck, may be a “make fucking money”…but it is working…because what guys want to see doesn’t matter, and really guys can jerk off to anything – they’ll fuck anything…and if it has tits…they think anything is hot…

So do I think a girl should have her fat photoshopped out, no, I like authenticity…but I think her face should be as authentic…no make-up…give it to us how it really is…like how I’d wake up next to her still drunk after she date rapes me because she’s aggressive and I’m desirable…

ALL THIS TO SAY – TERRIFYING..

It turns out that Pirelli has gone in a new direction, no high fashion models naked, no excuse to get high fashion models naked, they clearly want the mom or women to trust their tires…because they went with Patti Smith, Serena Williams, Feminist Child Blooger, Fran Leibowitz the old Lesbian, and some business woman…in what is a powerful woman like the powerful rubber they use – I guess…

We are no longer in a tit objectifying women world…

Screen Shot 2015-11-30 at 6.08.20 PM

Screen Shot 2015-11-30 at 6.08.12 PM

Posted in:Amy Schumer|Pirelli|SFW

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!