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Archive for the Amber Heard Category

2010

07

Dec

Amber Heard’s Lesbianism has Imppecable Timing of the Day

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I always knew lesbianism was pretty serious…cuz every lesbian I’ve ever met has taken things pretty serious. I mean from the first time they reach out to me with some women studies theories, to the emails, to the hateful look in her eye when I meet them in person, all assured me that lesbians have no sense of humor, are on some kind of mission, and are not down to fuck around, especially not with dick….

So serious and uptight from not getting dick like real women, that they always have impecable timing, and I guess that would apply to Amber Heard if she was actually a lesbian, but conveniently, she has a movie coming out December 17th, so her press release hustle is clearly bullshit.

Someone’s just trying to get in the media’s eye, and you would too, if your biggest movie was a Seth Rogan move.

I love bottom feeders….now here she is in her lesbian bikini for the trailer of this junky bullshit.

Posted in:Amber Heard

2010

13

Aug

Amber Heard Flashes Her Panties in a Classic Upskirt of the Day

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I wonder if the rest of the world is as bored of celebrities as I am. It’s like there is no excitement anymore…it’s all been done, it’s all been played out cuz the PR people figured out the simple tricks to go noticed, or what I like to call “Bikini, Panty, Nipple, Vagina, Sex Tape” in order of desperation, that now when a young starlet I want to fuck partially cuz shes young, partially cuz she’s alirght looking, partially cuz I saw Zombieland and it was either her or Little Miss Sunshine or some awkward Jewish guy to lust after, but mainly cuz she’s got a vagina and since being punished with my wife’s tainted, meaty, smelly, what looks like it may be roadkill and the definitely is the single most vile pussy I have ever encountered in my life, and I have encountered many, most low fucking grade, pretty much everything is a step the fuck up and stomp the fucking yard….

So here is Amber Heard in what has become the classic getting out of the car with white panties in a black dress so the cameras get it incidences that woulda been better done crotchless….or maybe even spread eagled on the beach somewhere, but like any PR person knows, you gotta make the shit look as casual as possible as to not look desperate….

Yes. I just analyzed a panty flash. I know. I should spend my energy staring at it. Just another example of me sucking at life…

Posted in:Amber Heard

2010

30

Jul

Amber Heard Topless in The Joneses of the Day

1 Comment »

I kinda like this bitch…I find myself googling her name everytime I see it and remembering that she’s one of those low level Hollywood bitches I think needs to get more naked so she becomes a household name to more than just the virgin losers who are obsessed with her role in Zombieland

I guess this is her making a move in the right direction by flashing tit…barely flashing tit…but still flashing tit and I’m showing my support hoping it encourages her enough that her next role shows pussy lip.

Either way, I’m a fan…

Posted in:Amber Heard

2009

11

Dec

Amber Heard in Her Bikini for Some Shitty TV Show of the Day

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I always forget who Amber Heard is. I just know her name comes up a lot and it turns out that she was on some shitty show I’m sure wasn’t a real winner for her, but in hindsight was a winner for us because she’s in a bikini, I guess, if you consider that winning, which I don’t, because I get nothing out of this shit other than seeing young bodies I don’t have sitting on my face and even when I was their age, I was too busy eating out the blind albino chick to hustle the girls like this who didn’t know I existed, so I guess if anything shit makes me feel like the loser, I already knew I was, but I am posting it….cuz I’ve come this far….

Here’s some clips on another slut I’ve never heard of named Tessa Thompson in this low level bullshit TV show….

Posted in:Amber Heard|Bikini

2009

11

Nov

Amber Heard’s Slut Legs of the Day

1 Comment »

I am tired of googling this bitch to figure out who she is. I’ve written about her before and I just keep forgetting who she is a solid 3 minutes after shit goes up only to come across average looking pictures of her again that I decide to post, only because I think she’s new to the game and remember that I’ve written about her before. It’s a constant struggle for me to keep up with all these nobodies, and I guess it’s a constant struggle for this bitch to stand out from the rest of the filler cunt in hollywood, and really all she has to do is release a masturbation video, cuz I’ll remember that shit forever, it’s like knowing a bitch’s vagina allows me to catalog her for future reference, but until then, she’s nothing but a face in the crowd….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Amber Heard|Legs|Slut

2009

27

Oct

Amber Heard for FHM of the Day

4 Comments »

I saw Zombieland the other day with a friend who paid for me because I am a whore like that.

A few minutes into the movie I decided that I wanted to marry Amber Heard or at least her vagina with my penis, but that may not be because she is all that hot and more because the only way I can sit thru any movie is if I can find a female character I can fantasize about doing dirty things to for pretty much the entire movie, otherwise I get really fucking bored and angry, and between her and Little Miss Sunshine, the compeition was pretty fuckin slim……but here she is in FHM and it turns out that I still want to fuck her….she is going to be the next it girl…

Posted in:Amber Heard|FHM

2009

24

Sep

Amber Heard’s Legs Posing with Zombies of the Day

2 Comments »

Amber Heard is some actor in the movie Zombieland. She is also an idiot and was quoted saying something along the lines that she decided to not be a model because modeling takes no talent but acting has substance, something I’m sure 95 percent of actors agree with and 95 percent of non-actors laugh at cuz we all know these cunts are just scamming all of us and getting paid big money for the shit.

She was posing with a zombie cuz zombie’s are the new vampires and lookin’at her, I realize that I wouldn’t mind eating her brains, and by brains I mean pussy.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Amber Heard|Zombie

2009

28

Apr

Amber Heard Topless in Some Movie of the Day

1 Comment »

Her name is Amber Heard, she was the highschool girlfriend in Pineapple Express. She is naked in this video that is supposed to be from her new movie called the informers. I dont know anything else about her. I don’t know if she is in highschool, the fact that she’s topless leads me to think she isn’t, but the perkiness of her tits, leads me to pretend that she is.

I guess that’s the reason so many guys I know like premature babies or girls with developmental issues and that’s because they look 14 when they are 18 and by people I know, I mean you.

Personally, I am more into grandmothers and their grey, hard, leathery pussy, but only because it comes with a pension, nap time and all the baked goods my fat kid self can desire…

Posted in:Amber Heard|Informers|Topless