Brooke Burns Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2014

30

Sep

Brooke Burns in Lingerie of the DAy

Brooke Burns is probably best knock for dating Bruce Willis….which at the time might have been a shocker because she was just a 26 year old Texan trying to make it in LA after Baywatch was cancelled…with no where to go but into the arms of a very rich and overpaid action star.

I don’t think she’s really don’t anything since Bruce Willis…but at least now she can be remembered for what really matters…lingerie pictures that may not even be of her…but that are probably to make her man happy – which is far better than being a street hooker….at least so I’ve heard.

Anyway, she may be 36 now, but welcome back Brooke Burns…there’s still hope for you

Posted in:Brooke Burns

2010

28

Jan

Brooke Burns in her See Thru Shirt of the Day

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The one thing that you’ll like about Brooke Burns, I mean other than the fact that she has a pussy and pussy is all you really care about because you rarely get to touch one, is the fact that she’s half robot, and as a virin loser comic book fan of Kevin Smith, a feature your dream girl has had since you were an action figure collecting 24 year old because she broke her neck swimming and has a neck made out of titanium which surprisingly appeals to me, not because I like robot women or sci fi like you, but I do like the crippled ones with serious injuries, who can predict the rain based on how much range of motion her neck has when sucking dick to the top, something that I guess she’s had limited capabilities to do because she’s pretty much a nobody now….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Brooke Burns|See Thru

2008

26

Sep

Brooke Burns Words of Wisdom to Keep Us Going Of The Day

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I was fucking around on Facebook last night and came across DJ AM’s facebook page, because up until today we are still Facebook friends, something I assume will change when he realizes I am an asshole.

On his wall was a life changing message from Brooke Burns. It read:

Just wanna say…you still have alot to do this lifetime. Never forget….

I could be wrong, but I think she’s referring to her vagina. Thanks Brooke Burns, did you get those words of wisdom from googling “what to tell someone who nearly died”, you stupid cunt. Did you feel obligated to leave your mark on his facebook because your last name is what he’s going to be dealing with the rest of his life. Did reports about Burns on his face give you something to masturbate to? Sometimes it is better to keep your opinions to yourself, or maybe use the private message option instead on embarrassing your dumb cunt self.

Here she is in some old Bikini Photoshoot doing what she’s good at and that’s not opening her stupid mouth or typing stupid shit on the internet, but not stupid enough shit to keep you profile public or to add me as a friend so that I can stalk her shit. I am offended.

Posted in:Brooke Burns|Words of Wisdom

2007

02

Oct

I am – Brooke Burns Bikini Pictures of the Day

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Here are some pictures of Brooke Burns Paddle Surfing like so many other celebrity bikini sets I’ve seen the last few months. It’s some new craze that everyone’s jumping on because they don’t realize how fucking Gay it is. This shit is gayer than watching prostate massage porn, and that’s pretty gay, even if the person doing the prostate massage has a vagina. Speaking of vagina, if you look close enough you can see part of her vagina, which should make you happy considering you’ve never really seen a vagina and everytime you watch porn shit’s like seeing pictures of the Loch Ness Monster or Big Foot, because you know it exists, you’ve just never tasted it.

Either way, here are those pics of a tall skinny and fit Brook Burns in her bikini.