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Archive for the Jessica Alba Category

2012

11

Jul

Jessica Alba in Her Bikini of the Day

I posted this pic of Jessica Alba in Italy in her bikini yesterday, or whenever it was that she put it up on Instagram, because I’m a fan of girls who are content produers….and who put the shit out before the paparazzi get to it….because the paparazzi are the devils and making the obsolete is a good thing…even the whole point of this post is to drive you to the paparazzi pics of Alba in her bikini …..

I like tacky girls marketing themselves in bikinis, it is the basis of most of my facebook masturbation sessions….you see cuz girls you know half naked is more fun than girls you don’t know getting fucked….and the real highlight of personal pics is finding out that bitch’s Mom’s got some Tits…..


TO SEE THE PAPARAZZI BIKINI PICS
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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

10

Jul

Jessica Alba Twitter Bikini Pic of the Day


I woke up and turned on my instagram cuz I am only following hot girls who seem to post all kinds of bikini pics of themselves in a way that would make me wonder if they ever sleep or if they are in perpetual sun in a bikini, if I wasn’t too busy masturbating to their pics….and these Alba shots of her being a drunk in a bikini dropped that I decided to comment saying

I can see your boner….no wait that’s mine

To which she responded by blocking me.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

21

Jun

Jessica Alba’s Posing Hot for a Photoshoot of the Day

I don’t know what this photoshoot is for, but seeing Jessica Alba in a strapless dress, pretty much looking like she’s been knocked over at her high school prom, or even better, like she’s fallen over from being roofied at her high school prom, only for some a sexual predator, let’s say someone like me, you know for the sake of argument, to have clear path to her golden fleshy baby making cavern of all things good in the world…..because mom or not, Alba is still pretty fucking hot, and mom or not, I can still have fantasies of being the guy she never gave the time of day to, getting up inside her while she rests….it’s a totally normal fantasy….google it if you don’t believe me….


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

30

Apr

Jessica Alba Shopping with a Friend in a Little Dress of the Day

There are two hot things going on here that I like….

One is that happily married chicks are porno to me….especially when they are as hot as Jessica Alba….because there is no such thing as happily married…and the slight chance that she’d cheat on her husand inspires me…cuz dating married chicks is like dating the terminally ill…it is short lived and full of passion…so you never get locked in or really have to deal with the bullshit….cuz everyone knows where they stand and that it is all just about fucking before it is too late…

The other is the hot friend who isn’t Jessica Alba but who wants to be and every night asks herself why she wasn’t so lucky…resenting her everytime they hang but using it as a chance to out dress her and show off her body that didn’t have two kids so that all eyes are on her for once….It is the competitive nature of being a woman….a competitive nature that I know fucks with this girl’s self esteem hard…and makes her willing to fuck subpar men to feel good about herself…and that works for me….in fact that’s the only reason I’ve had sex.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

11

Apr

Jessica Alba Wrestles of the Day

I am guessing that Alba is in some shitty movie where one of the genius scenes was to have her jump into the wrestling ring with some dude and beat him, while fully clothed….when everyone knows the only wrestling a bitch should do is either half naked our on my dick….but I assume that since she’s just had her second kid, strapping her vagina in jeans was a safe bet as to not have her labia flapping in the wind, getting injured by dude accidentally shoving his entire fist in her accidentally….you know how it is ladies who have kids….things will never be the same again…..

Luckily for Alba, she’s still hot enough to watch squat and roll….no matter how big her vagina may be. I’m still a fan and hope her comeback involves way more nudity.


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

30

Mar

Jessica Alba Hot in Jack Magazine Italy of the Day

I still like Jessica Alba….despite all she has going against her….mainly being older and a mom of two….two things that generally make me want to move onto appreciating younger pussy that hasn’t been ravaged by the horrible nightmare that is marketed as a miracle…child birth….but for some reason….I’m into her….

She’s like the bitch you fucked in your 20s, who is now a mom, married and miserable in her upper middle class life, hitting you up on facebook for another round cuz her husband is out of town at a conference and she’s ready to cheat….and she’s chosing you… cuz you’ve been there, you always had a connection and most importantly no one she knows would believe you if you told anyone what happened so you can’t extort her, and why would you, she’s the one who got away and you’ve been jerking off to memories of her like you were a chick in your bath and not into porn the last decade…..dying to experience her and her rich and fancy smells and maintained body even if it has baggage like kids and less tight vagina….things you normally hate…..but her wanting you to lick her asshole before fucking it like you used to, something her vanilla lawyer or doctor or whatever husband doesn’t do to her….makes it all worth it.

It’s one of those brokeback mountain “I can’t quit you” situations, just less homo…and here is Alba, mom pussy, mom body and all in some magazine for no real reason….


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

06

Mar

Jessica Alba’s Panty flash or Possible Dried Up Uterus Flash of the Day

I am not entirely sure if this is her panties or the remnants of her uterus that she’s abused so agressively sticking out of her pussy…all dried up in atrophy……

But if it is her panties…that’s fucking boring…cuz I’m way more into female reporduction organs…they are my porn…..ovaries all over my face motherfucker.


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

02

Feb

Jessica Alba Pantsless Some Australia Magazine Shoot of the Day

I’m a little slow on these pictures and I don’t even know why I feel compelled to post them…but they are of new mom Jessica Alba that were in Australia Instyle this past January…and they could have been shot pretty much any fucking time…but I’m gonna assume they are after her second baby….so I figure my motivation is trying to understand how she pulled off this pantsless leotard looking onesie shit…without having a fleshy pile of mom pussy sticking out the sides…is it photoshop…or is Alba a freak of nature…or more importantly…does Alba just get a C-Section like every smart girl trying to maintain her pussy’s appearance and tightness….not that it matters since my dick is so small, even an infant’s vagina is loose on me….but I like wasting my days thinking about these idiotic things…thanks for joining me.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

11

Jan

Jessica Alba and Rebecca Romijn at an Event I Wasn’t Invited to of the Day

I don’t get invited to events…especailly not celebrity events…and if I was I doubt I’d go…even though crashing these things would probably put the site on the map…making me almost question my laziness…before remembering the site isn’t even considered PRESS or MEDIA if anything I’m a red flag and on the list of people not allowed in….bringing flashbacks of neglect when I was growing up and not invited to all the parties and dances cuz I was the loser who didn’t fit in…and that would make me sad, or angry or seek revenge…if I had emotion…or pride…or really even cared about much…or more importantly if I had a pussy…but instead I just focus on what’s important…the pussy.

Either way, Alba and Romijn were at this event….and sure, they both look a little tired….a little older…a little more adult and motherly…but they both are still hot enough for me to stare at…especially when Alba wears her gothic, PVC, Leather, Mesh top dress that looks like she’s ready to get cummed all over in a fetish flick….and while Rebecca Romijn proves getting knocked up by the kid from “My Secret Identity” doesn’t have to ruin your 40 year old model ass or legs like marrying John Stamos ruined her dignity….

Here are the pics…

ALBA:

REBECCA ROMIJN STAMOS

Posted in:Jessica Alba|Rebecca Romijn

2012

05

Jan

Jessica Alba’s Mexican Mom Ass in Pants of the Day

With all the breeding that Alba’s been under the last few years…I find her slowly becoming more and more Mexican…something she tried to hide because no one wants to admit they are Mexican….unless there’s a trend in Hollywood that being hispanic is good for business..in which case the bitch exploits it…we’re talking to you Eva Longoria….

The only thing not Mexican mom about her is that she’s bounced back from the babies like it is her job, cuz it is her job to look good, unlike other Mexican women who’s only job is to make more fucking babies….and corn tortillas for dinner after they husband comes home from his gardening/brick factory gig…

I know how these things work….my name is Jesus Martinez after all…and that is that her ass, shredded apart or not…is hot even in pants…

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

03

Jan

Jessica Alba’s Mom Body in a Bikini of the Day

The good thing about mom pussy is anal sex. That’s the beacon of light in dealing with never feeling anything from sex with a mom cuz your cock is small…

I guess clenching an ass is far easier than clenching a cunt…and the mom is more open minded to it especially after child birth…maybe because of shitting on the birthing table, maybe because of losing their dignity after being poked and exposed to rooms full of people, or maybe cuz their perineum is cut to make room for the baby….more importanly…mom’s just want to feel sexy and know their vaginas aren’t what they used to be…..and just want to satisfy….

Who knows…it is all speculation and here’s Alba’s mom body in a bikini….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

02

Jan

Jessica Alba’s Tummy Tuck Post Pregnancy Bikini Pics of the Day

Alba has bounced back from her second pregnancy pretty fucking amazingly..and I guess it’s easier when your entire career depends on it….you know since before you entrapped your ex boyfriend by knocking yourself up and sacrificing your everything….because women, especially very rich women, work of impulse and emotion…and not off logic or wanting to maximize their good looks or the fact they are in high demand, when their talent is relatively little to none…and the real question is how did this happen so fast, was it diet, exercise or is that a tummy tuck scar…who cares….cuz famous bitches I wanted to fuck who are moms with mom pussies wrapped tightly in bikini bodies with tight bodies are exciting…cuz they are the easiest to fist….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

15

Dec

Alba Looks Better in a Bikini than Doing Mom Shit of the Day

Nothing hotter than a mom of two in an oversized sweater walking down the street with a stroller….If I had my way that would be intro to every porn, shit, it’s so hot I’d tattoo it on my thigh so that I could look down at it everytime I jerk off, because nothing makes me cum harder than ravaged pussy and parenting responsibilities….oh right….everything makes me cum harder than mom pussy covered up being a mom….

There was at time…when Alba was the nice titty, nice ass, hot half Mexi chick we all wanted to fuck….all in bikini and never nude in movies….

Those times are done….stop living in the past….Now it is time to move the fuck on….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

01

Dec

Jessica Alba Mom Body in Period Pants of the Day

I wonder if she’s waitinf for her period to hit – or if she’s waiting for her afterbirth – either way she’s prepared to not be embarrassed like the 14 year old school girl in white pants who had to call her mom to pick her up that horrible day she became a woman…who fucking cares…I just know the paparazzi fucking suck…they have one task to accomplish and that is to take pics of these cunts and even though they work in herds of armenians…they couldn’t get Ahkmed or whatever the fuck an Armenian name is to stand behind the bitch…BULLSHIT.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2011

08

Nov

Some Bitches at the Glamor Awards of the Day

Every day there are events that I am not invited to…I’m talking around the globe, events I am left out of, because either people don’t know me, or don’t want me, or forget to include me….From birthday parties, to club nights, to even meetings at the bowling alleys…..and the neglect or rejection reminds me of high school and would hurt me if I actually cared to go…I don’t need your stupid parties…especially not celebrity events…cuz free drink and free food with famous twats hasn’t got shit on couch sitting……and here are some pics of the sluts at the Glamour Gala event I wasn’t invited to…

Beverly Johnson and her See Through Shirt…..she’s the first black model to ever be on the cover of American Vogue back in 1974, a 60 year old revolutionary showing off her nipples works for me…

Alba in what I thought was some latex fetish suit – you know like a little catholic or AMISH or Mormon orhan you can wipe the cum off role play suit – but turned out to be some sequined shit you’d expect to see on a Golden Girl in 89….proving yet again that starting a family makes a bitch really suck….

J.Lo and her Leg trying to be sexy, forgetting she never was sexy….

That dude from Glee

How about some Blondie Deborah Harry turned Whitie……for no reason than to post a bad joke…

Chelsea Handler in Some Cat Suit…that hugged her vagina and tits like the whore that she is…..or that she was to get to where she is.

Posted in:Beverly Johnson|Debbie Harry|J.Lo|Jessica Alba|Lea Michele

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