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Archive for the Jessica Alba Category

2025

18

Feb

Jessica Alba Old Lady Pussy Sag While Bikini Whoring of the Day

Jessica Alba is a billionaire because the internet is full of retards who buy into whatever they are being sold, even when it’s a scam.

She’s since retired from her billion dollar brand, divorced her husband who used her as the cheerleader for the brand, which is the reason it was such a success.

Not bad for a whore, because I’ve heard from insiders that she’s a whore who has been consistently fucking different celebs throughout her marriage.

She is now old as shit, a fucking dinosaur and she’s starved herself out while trying to recreate bikini moments ya’ll probably jerked off to at one time.

Only being old as shit, makes it a little grosser, her face a little more like a lifeless sex doll from the injections, her bikini bottoms hanging off her body, like the bikini is trying to escape the pussy because it knows it’s toxic…or maybe it’s just what happens when your body starts looking like you’re dying of cancer….pussy bikini sag…

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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2025

30

Jan

Jessica Alba’s Yoga Fart Fetish Porn of the Day

There’s a rumor going around that Ben Affleck is stickin’ it to Jessica Alba, because she’s Jessica Alba, even if she’s a rotten and crusty version of Jessica Alba, despite being Ben Affleck, who can go recruit the next Jessica Alba in the event that he wasn’t too lazy, drunk or bored of conversation with groupie cunt but instead more interested in more familiar cunt that was hot cunt back in his prime. At least her name isn’t Jennifer.

Jessica Alba is recently divorced but two people in the Hollywood scene have told me over the years that she fucks all the famous actors despite being married, she’s one of those horny chicks who can’t accept not being the hot chick anymore, because her people forced her to do he corporate chick and her hotness was forgotten by a generation, so like Megan Fox, she’s trying to move back in and get her cunt the credit it deserves, even if it’s been behind the scenes dealing in young actor cock….not that Affleck is young actor cock but there’s a double standard and Ben Affleck at 50 is basically as appealing to all chicks as Ben Affleck in his 20s, while women don’t get that same luxury because biology rots them out and makes them infertile, because even nature knows bitch is too fucking old to be out there with that pussy behaving like that.

In being a recently divorced, she’s doing her YOGA, wearing her tight outfit, being a real fucking sleaze intentionally posing and bending in ways that are meant for a porno sex tape, but instead are performed at your local yoga studio, which is probably more fun in person, if you’re gay or into that kind of fitness of looking at ass in tight pants, because in person you get to deal with the Yoga Farts, which in the event you didn’t know is the highlight of the experience.

Posted in:Jessica Alba|Jessica Alba

2025

15

Jan

Smiling Billionaire Divorcee Jessica Alba Struggles with Sweater Through the LA Fires of the Day

Thanks to the media and the CNN addicted perverts of the world, people in Canada are talking in the grocery store line about the California fires.

Shit like “did you see the fires, 12,000 homes destroyed, so many people displaced and many had no insurance”. They are basically crying on each other’s shoulders about rich assholes losing their 2nd and 3rd houses that may not be insured but that the millions of dollars of paintings in there are definitely insured. The furniture all bought at the latest trendy furniture designer’s store.

I only feel bad for the animals. Maybe I’m a psycho….

These Canadian grocery store dwellers talking the news aren’t talking about how paying taxes would imply that the government at the local level and at the state level should be spending that money on your safety and security….instead they are crying about rich people they don’t know losing their houses…

While bitches in LA, like billionaire Jessica Alba with the celebrity tits, are sitting at the trendy grocery store with a friend having a 30 dollar smoothie, because she’s a fucking billionaire divorcee who can afford that shit.

She’s even sitting outside, not in a mask top dramatize the air quality like they do when their intern makes posts pretending they care because these self involved assholes, especially those who pretend they are Latina and identify as Latina when their DNA says they are not Latina, since they are FRAUDS…self involved frauds..

So while people dig through the rubble of their lives, while people try to find their pets, Alba’s having girl talk over a smoothie….a real fucking hero.

Putting on her sweater because it’s a little chilly out….despite the raging fires to keep her satanic ass warm…a real fucking hero.

She is retired and should be on the frontlines trying to make a difference for her community. Obviously.

It’s almost like she’s HAPPY about the wild fires – look at that smile….

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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2025

09

Jan

Jessica Alba’s Divorce Overshadowed By Wildfires of the Day

I am not saying the creep that is Jessica Alba, a FAKE MEXICAN according her her own DNA results, but who claims to be a latina because actors are fucking liars, set fire to her neighborhood in California as a diversion from her divorce story, her divorce really isn’t that big of a news item.

I am just saying it’s PRETTY fucking convenient, isn’t it….that they announce their split and then LA goes up in smoke.

Seeing as she’s a communist on the libtard hustle, dick sucking for KAMALA…we can assume it’s some sort of satanic cutting the head off one of the apocalypse horses in the book of revelation….or maybe it’s just a coincidence, if you believe in that kind of thing.

I don’t pretend to have insider information on the inner workings of celebs, I am not in their scene…

HOWEVER, I have been told by more than one person who has access to the inner workings of the celebrity scene, that Alba’s a full on whore.

She fucks every celebrity, has been having sex with every celebrity, throughout her marriage….

Her husband, a cuck just happy to be with Alba, accepting her whore ways because that’s the price he paid to end up with her and breed her.

I’ve heard she hits up all the new young actors, the old famous actors, I’ve seen heard about her herpes…

She’s basically a degenerate but women buy her shitty products and made her a billionaire.

Here she is in the gym on a MONDAY…

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2024

08

Oct

Jessica Alba and Other Useless Celebs Do Political Endorsements of the Day

I am Canadian and I don’t do politics but seeing celebrities endorsing Kamala is always pretty funny and a sign that they are bought and controlled by the machine.

This is a memory of the Obama days of YES I CAN where the celebrities had influence and could rally up some energy…but no one cares about celebrities.

Now it feels like a lot of old timers at an old timer hockey game remembering the glory days as they convalesce before being put on palliative care at the old folks home they all live in.

I don’t know how they think they can relate, influence, inspire anyone when they are just scamming celebrities who live in their elitist circles, who don’t let the every man in on it no matter how hard they rock their Real Tree hats. Sitting in their castles that have aggressive security to keep you out.

A lot of desperation, last ditch effort going on here…

At this stage in the game, does Kamala even exist let alone stand a shot.

Sure she does sex podcasts for retard parasite worm eating their way through the brains of young sluts, Howard Stern who I thought died in the 90s but in fact turned into some weird dick sucker for the machine, the late night show hosts who replaced comedy with sadness because they are prisoners of the machine that has dirt on them…

No one wants a woman running anything besides the household to keep them busy…where’s my sandwich bitch….plus people are waking up to the fact that the machine really doesn’t want Trump in office and have been attacking him since before he started to try to stop him and since the machine doesn’t give a fuck about you common man. If you hate Trump it’s because you’re not listening, you’re just a victim of a information warfare propaganda attack on the guy. Why do they hate him so much?

You have to assume that they don’t like him because he’s coming for them…or that he’s going to break up the system they’ve put in place to rob you tax payer because they don’t like you, they don’t invite you to their parties, they think you are useless breathers, they just use you to get ahead and forget that they are there to represent you and to work for YOUR interests not their own, or the interests of the people who own them….their funders…

But I’m Canadian, what do I know or care. I just think that Trump is hysterical and does my brand of no bullshit comedy…which isn’t even his job…and I like to be entertained….which is why I don’t understand how people don’t like him.

Jessica Alba is a fake Mexican, she exploits being LATINA when her DNA isn’t even hispanic….and thus a fraud…

Here she is telling you how to think, because she’s a cunt like that….

Alba says a whole lot of nothing about standing on your ancestors shoulders, who aren’t hispanic but of European origin, because they would want you not allowing other people to take power from you….which I guess is Alba endorsing baby killing….she says she was working class and people deserve a shot thanks to a 50k tax incentive for small business or some shit. Seems like a retard to me….when did the tits decide they have a brain…and where are the tits while she showcases her retard level intelligence.

The question is Jessica Alba why do you like killing babies? Is it because you prefer them on your face, tits, ass or mouth?

These whores can’t be trusted. These people are monsters. This is embarrassing.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2024

03

Oct

Industry Flesh Puppet Jessica Alba Propagandizes for the Machine of the Day

Jessica Alba is one of those Mexicans who never really promoted being Mexican until it was good for business.

She was probably human trafficked over the border, but she is excited about her experience from her abusers because of the wonderful life they allowed her to have.

From sex worker to celebrity, she climbed the ranks and didn’t end up dead like the other people they human traffic and condition to do what they need them to do.

In being loyal to her abusers, she’s decided to get political and push people to vote, probably for a specific party like she was Taylor Swift, because if it was for the other party she’d be cancelled by her handlers.

I don’t care about politics, I am Canadian.

I just think celebrities not realizing that people don’t care about celebrities and thus they don’t care about what celebrities think about politics, since celebrities are rich as shit and live a delusional life in their mansions that they cry about social issues like climate change, while using more energy for their big homes and private jets that many people combined….and their virtue signalling goes deeper and deeper into unbelievable while knowing that they don’t interact with poor people, they’re fucking snobs in their island of snobery.

So the point is, Alba old and out of touch is trying to get Latinas on her side, while barely being a Latina, or ever really endorsing that until it become a marketing angle for a soulless attention seeking flesh puppet designed to flip flop wherever the opportunity lies while having zero loyalty to anyone because they are empty…

If anything, I would find this Latina cosplay offensive. Where the girl has put on more of a tan than she normally has but worse…HOOP EARINGS and a VOTE chain like she’s dressing as a CHOLA on Halloween because she’s so out of touch.

This is so fucking TRANSPARENT and I can’t imagine anyone falls for this shit, which makes it funnier to see them trying to pull it off like it was 20 years ago when Celebrity mattered….

To make it even better her DNA says she’s not even Mexican or Latina – making this actually RACIST:


Alba’s global admixture was 72.7% European, 22.5% East Asian and Native American, 2% Sub-Saharan African, 0.3% Middle Eastern and North African, 0.1% South Asian and 2.4% “No Match”

Where is the LATINA blood you fucking joker….

All this to say, you’d still jerk off on her face if you could…and I know that because some of you will literally jerk off onto a picture of her face you either print or pull up on your phone that’s easy to clean due to it’s touch screen glass surface.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2024

14

May

Did you know Jessica Alba Posted a Bikini Picture of the Day

Jessica Alba retired from her CEO job that we all assume was just a vanity title to push the brand from a marketing perspective, but stranger people have run billion dollar companies and whether Alba was the brains or just a figurehead is pretty irrelevant since she basically made a billion dollars off the shit and as an hyped for being hot actress, that’s a pretty big deal.

In being retired, I assume she’s heading back to the acting thing she abandoned for the more lucrative internet business that sells direct to consumer….and in doing that she’s got to produce that social media content we can all jerk off to because that’s her whole angle as a celebrity…

As a brand owner she was a fake holistic / healthy product pushing, as an actor, she’s about being jerked off to and I assume she likes it.

Now that she doesn’t have to appease the shareholders, the tits can come out as they were meant to and we can go back to remembering Alba being the hot celeb, just 20 years later….

I’m still into it, because I’m old.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2024

14

May

Maria Menounos’ Ball Pussy of the Day

Maria Menounos is not dead, but the TV host turned Podcast Network owner worth tons of fucking money has had a bunch of cancers, which is never a good time….especially when it’s Pancreatic cancer, which I was always told is terminal, but I guess she was able to beat it because she’s rich.

The entertainment host men would jerk off to when their wives made them watch bullshit entertainment news shows has clearly gone YOLO since the cancer, because she’s decided to masturbate on the international INTERNET broadcasting platform….

They all turn perverted eventually, and this one is exceptionally perverted as she tries to insert a giant ball in her pussy….she’s a greek, so we know that she can get that in her ass with ease, but the pussy will be a challenge.

I know what you’re thinking, she is a recent mom, so the pussy should be about to suck up that ball she’s trying to reverse egg-lay, but the truth is…she used a surrogate…too much cancer to breed her old ass I guess….

Anyway, everyone’s just masturbating all the fucking time like a bunch of retards…and I enjoy it.


JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2024

23

Apr

Jessica Alba is Grinding on Wood of the Day

I’ve heard stories that Jessica Alba is one of those sex workers who can’t get enough dick, you know the kind who is basically mentally retarded and always grabbing at her vagina because it’s tingling and she needs it to cum, it’s a specific kind of woman wired in a specific way that makes them insatiable fuck addicts….

So the stories I’ve heard is that she is married and does have kids with the dude who basically helped turn her into a millionaire, but the trade off is that she gets to fuck whoever she wants, whenever she wants and they say that she does.

Sure she plays mom and consumer product CEO, but that’s all just for show, they have people who do all the work, while Alba just grinds against her office chair waiting to find a celebrity or athlete to fuck..

I could be making up all these stories, but seeing the now retired CEO grinding up on a tree, it’s just so obvious she’s out of control….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2024

22

Mar

Jessica Alba’s Thong Dress of the Day

Jessica Alba still exists, obviously, she’s probably more obnoxious now than she was back when she was just some hot chick in movies that everyone went nuts over, because she’s a dot com billionaire.

She was one of the first celebrities to create a direct to consumer brand and make stupid money off her celebrity by selling her “HONEST” products, that were pretty much a fucking lie, but people didn’t care, they wanted to buy something Alba endorsed.

As someone who has watched these celebrities go from hot chick in movies trying to make it, to weathered old bitches who amassed extreme fame and wealth off the backs of us perverts….it always amazes me how much celebrity these people have and how effective celebrity is at making them money.

You’d think the average person wouldn’t give a fuck about buying Alba toilet paper, or whatever her Honest brand sells, but then you hear the sales numbers and you’re like “she sold a roll of toilet paper to 80 percent of the world population”….how does that even happen, she’s definitely not that hot.

Anyway, she’s in ELLE INDIA and she posted a video of the shoot. One of the dresses has a built in THONG looking effect to it, which I guess speaks to the WHALE TAILS of the 00s trend and the screenshot that they pulled from the video is on some DRAG QUEEN STORYTIME look…

Bitch is old…the Drag Queen looks happen but still ALBA…only richer and now validated as more than just the overhyped hot chick in movies…

Posted in:Jessica Alba