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Archive for the Jessica Alba Category

2013

02

Jul

Jessica Alba for Glamour of the Day

I don’t get overly excited about Jessica Alba, but she’s still Jessica Alba…you see she’s always been hot enough to look at…but she’s also always been fucking annoying. Whether it was never getting naked in her movies despite being cast as the hot chick, to having babies pre-maturely to trap her husband, to now doing some Martha Stewart shit, it’s just been fucking consistent disappointment with her…so I know what she’s posing for magazines, it’s not for a “before and after” expose on mom vaginas…it won’t even be artistic nudes, even after being spread out on the hospital bed birthing, it’s will just always be G-Rated, leaving us wanting nudity, and after so many years, it no longer remains cute, if anything it just makes me mad…

I don’t even really want to see a naked mom of 2 in her 30s…I mean despite the fact that I want to see every single woman ever naked…but it’s not my fetish or something I seek, but her constant tease, the 2 decade old tease, that always ends in disappointment, kinda makes me want it more…

So her she is in August’s Glamour….we’ll leave it at that.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

18

Jun

Jessica Alba for the Sunday Times of the Day


Jessica Alba was in the Sunday Times and she looked pretty fucking lovely, despite not being naked enough for my liking, she’s Jessica Alba, and has never been naked enough for my liking, she always knew she was hot, and always knew that getting naked would end her appeal, so she never fucking did it. I just assumed falling off the map and having a couple of kids would have made her more desperate, only instead of taking any job she can get, now more naked because she’s eager to get back in the limelight, or even to establish herself as an actor now that she’s more comfortable being spread out on a table in front of a room full of people thanks to child birth…

But instead she took the Martha’s Stewart route…you know if Martha Stewart wore evening gowns on tennis courts..

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

17

May

Jessica Alba is in Workout Gear of the Day

Jessica Alba was walking around in workout gear and I figured I’d post it, despite Jessica Alba’s sex appeal being virtually dead, even if she’s bounced back from her pregnancies, she’s still had those pregnancies….

Sure she’s hotter than any girl you’ve got with, and you may still have a soft spot in your masturbation schedule for her, you know one for old times, cuz you have a hard time moving on….and sure even as a shell of what was, it’s still not horrible…

But I was hoping to see more cameltoe, tight pants do that to women, before realizing, her labia are probably taped to her inner thigh, you know as a result of those pregnancies…


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

07

May

Jessica Alba Titty Flash of the Day

It would only make sense that Jessica Alba, a slut who pretended she wasn’t a slut, until she took on a little entrapment like she was from Cleveland, via her uterus, because that’s what broken girls who fear being alone do….get pregnant….would walk around in a sheer bra now for the paparazzi, in a whole “i’ve given up” or “notice me over here” kinda way. It’s good for business…..

This is the same girl who wouldn’t even get in her underwear in a movie, but I guess age, realizing no one cares that much about her naked ass, and countless visits to the gyno have eased her up…into a Jessica Alba I can respect and appreciate….even if I resent her for waiting til it was almost too late to do what she shoulda been doing at 20…because she’s fit and at least she fucking did it…

Lovin’ these Titties….


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Posted in:Jessica Alba|Nipple|NSFW

2013

26

Apr

Jessica Alba in Some Magazine of the Day

Jessica Alba is working it good, even showing a little puffy nipple thanks to too much breast feeding, for some magazine I’ve never heard of, but that I know has taken the right steps in post production to make her skin look like she’s not in her 30s or a mom of 2, but instead a young vibrant thing we all used to want to have sex with as she got paid millions to cock tease us before settling down…and for that we celebrate, not that we haven’t given this unappreciative, never-nude bitch enough, like her fucking whole life of luxury, thanks to our lusting after her, something we could have collectively taken back from her, if we weren’t all such fucking perverts with no control over wanting to fuck girls in movies marketed to us hard.

here are the pics.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

08

Apr

Jessica Alba’s Looking Ok in a Bikini for a Mom of the Day

I don’t like celebrating women who spat in the face of their fans and her sex appeal to reproduce for selfish reasons, like locking her husband in. I am more into celebrating women who squirt in the face of their fans for money, but that’s got nothing to do with this post.

I don’t like saying shit like “she’s still got it” cuz she’d be hotter if she never had the kids.

So this whole older, sloppier, her skin hangs off the back of her thighs, her tits sag a little more than when she was in her 20s and not a fucking mom of two, doesn’t get a “PASS” from me, like it does from all the other sites, those pervert virgins would cum if they say a 300 pound bitch in a bikini.

I don’t celebrate – look how much she bounced back and how she’s almost as good as she was – shit.

I say, bitch, at least you’re not fat, and at least you’re in a bikini, cuz that shit is better to look at than clothes, but you are a fraction of what you were, reminding us all that breeding kills women.

Here are a few of the pics I’m not allowed to post.

To see a shit ton of ALba bikini pics from this St Barts Trip go HERE and HERE

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

05

Apr

Jessica Alba Mom Ass in a Bikini of the Day

Jessica Alba, despite being a dirty mom of two, with a vagina that has probably been ravaged, thanks to being a mom of two, you know unable to grip a cock with no hands, thanks to the damage she put it through to trap a boyfriend, cuz celebs are insecure damaged vulnerable people with trust issues and daddy issues to begin with, so they pull gutter moves, just while wearing designer clothes…..still holds a soft spot in my heart, cuz she’s Jessica Alba and despite being that mom of two, still rock’s it in a bikini well into her 30s, a cut off date I’m usually pretty strict about, more old ladies need to look like this. Fact.


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

25

Mar

Jessica Alba is in Latina Magazine of the Day

For generations, Jessica Alba has tried to down play her Mexican Roots. Like Eva Longoria they didn’t want to celebrate being Mexican with a fucking dozen kids, some corn tortillas but instead celebrated being Mexican by hiring a mexican maid and gardener to boss the fuck around, because most Mexicans trying to make it in white America try to distance themselves from being Mexican, like we are third rate citizens that White people don’t like, before realizing that they should milk the Mexican card, cuz as Mexicans we support our own, even the traitors, who secretly we love for getting famous and despite not embracing Mexico in public, have Mexico in their soul, proven by her half dozen (2) babies before 30.

She’s Jessica Alba, she’s still hot, even if the sauce she puts on her taco isn’t, and taco I mean her vagina…all broken with babies and shit.

Here she is getting some votes for Latina magazine. Welcome back woman. You need all the help you can get.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

06

Mar

Jessica Alba’s Panty Flash of the Day

I don’t know what is more offensive…the fact that she’s hanging with an Asian….dressed like an Asian…in what seems like she’s mockin’ and Asian….like a fat rich American Tourist in Japan dressed like a Gesiha girl….screaming at the locals for sushi….you know just inappropriate and not sensitive to other culture…..or the fact that she’s wearing underwear….

I remember a time when people would have died for this….but now that she’s a mom of two…it is suddenly far less interesting….in fact we kinda encourage her to keep the tights and panties on…because we don’t really want her mom pussy to throw off our impression of her…

But I really wanna see it….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

06

Feb

Jessica Alba is the Worst for Women’s Health of the Day

I don’t know what compelled me to watch an interview with Jessica Alba for Women’s Health’s latest edition….but I did it….I think it had something to do with her being in some kind of crop top showing off where a couple babies ruined her career and motivated her to start some company of her own that I am pretty sure she plugs along the way but can’t be too sure cuz I muted the bitch…something I assume her husband probably wishes he had the power to do….you know ever since she trapped him into marriage by getting pregnant…it was like dude was banging her at her peak and now he’s stuck with her through her demise…but at least she’s not fat….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

14

Jan

Jessica Alba Boring But I’d Still Fuck Her in InStyle of the Day


Jessica Alba is in a recent issue of InStyle where she’s not doing anything particularly sexy…I mean she’s posing with kids toys, which unless you’re the fucking sexy nanny I am coming home to fuck while my wife is at the hair salon, I’m not entirely interested…cuz eating a pussy that I know a baby was shat out of more than once…kinda makes me fucking sick…the whole alien parasite nesting shit I just can’t wrap my mind around because I’m either autistic or because I don’t want to believe or accept that’s how we are made….but I am willing to accept that Alba still has sex appeal…only more mature…bringing out fantasy of a wife you’d want to break down year after year…ignoring her after she threw away her dreams to be with you and have your family..who doesn’t know she’s this hot….cuz you don’t show her appreciation…and who just constantly seeks your approval not knowing millions of better dudes would treat her like a queen…but her focus, like all girls is micro….and that makes her totally devoted to you cuz you are her everything….leading to better blow jobs…true story.

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2013

03

Jan

Jessica Alba’s in a Bikini and I Don’t Care of the Day

There’s something about a bitch having two kids that makes her invisible….even if her body is incredible…even if she’s someone who was considered the hottest Mexican to grace shitty movies…that she never got naked in….before doing typical hoodrat Mexican shit like getting herself knocked up to lock in a man….

The only good thing about her, is that she puts all other fat lazy mom’s to shame….cuz they pretend they can’t bounce back from their uterus being used to its full, unfortunate potential…

Yeah yeah…I get it…you wish this kind of thing was your wife or what your wife looked like…but what kind of person fantasizes about a wife…that’s way too lonely, sad, hopeless romantic…fantasies should be about hot pussy.

You see cuz there are a lot of under 30s out there, pre-baby making, who look better than this without starving themselves and trying so hard to have a second go at a career

I suggest we focus on that.

But on a positive Not AT LEAST SHE’S NOT Reese Witherspoon who Should Be Banned from Beaches ….Seriously….I know it’s not saying much but REESE WITHERSPOON ON THE BEACH SCARES ME …..

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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

05

Oct

Looking Down Jessica Alba’s Shirt of the Day


I keep holding onto the Jessica Alba dream because I am dated, out of the loop, I don’t leave my house and I don’t pay attention to the new Jessica Albas, the up and comers, the future….but after seeing her deflated mom tits in a bra, I figure it’s time to say goodbye to yesterday…

Alba’s an old lady, a mom, and even if she bends over in the rain wearing a black bra, all for the paparazzi to say “look at me, I’m still here and stylish, relevant and hot”…..I think it’s time to catalog her in the box in the basement of our minds as a teen dream we used to jerk off to and eagerly await hard nipple pics of….in a time that is long gone.

She’s done, or at least I’m done with her, but here’s one more run of Jessica Alba for the believers.


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

28

Sep

Jessica Alba Ass Scatcher of the Day


There is something that comes with being a mother that is amazing and beautiful….but there is so much more that comes with being a mother that is fucking disgusting….like the fact that these women spend so much time in doctor’s offices spread…or dealing with puking, shitting babies, even if the nanny does most of the work….coupled with hormones and exhaustion that lead to doing inappropriate shit like scratching your hermorhoided mom ass in public cuz your designer panties are irritating them….and for some reason I like this better than when bitches are young, conservative prude…giving up is awesome.


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Posted in:Jessica Alba

2012

17

Aug

Jessica Alba in a Kids Pool in an Actual Pool in a Bikini of the Day


Jessica Alba has blocked me on twitter becasue she didn’t like my love letters I’d send her every hour on the hour….discussing the way I would treat her half mexican baby making ass like it was a dog I rescued from a backyard breeder….so I don’t know when this crafty bikini pic was taken all I know is that she’s showing off her cunt privileged life of being so rich and fortunate that she can swim in a pool within a pool, while the average american only gets to swim in sewer drainage ditches after a rainstorm….Oh how good it is to be hollywood…

I’m just posting it cuz she’s in a bikini and that’s the only way I like girls.

Posted in:Jessica Alba