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Archive for the Rachel Bilson Category

2008

18

Apr

Rachel Bilson is in the Most Annoying Relationship of the Day

So Rachel Bilson and Star Wars are the new “it” couple in Hollywood and that means that they have to star in movies together because it’s great marketing. They just finished one about Egypt and now they are doing this one and the good news is that the stress of spending everyday and every night together will probably break them up because Star Wars won’t have enough down time to himself to play videogames and fuck other chicks behind her back cuz she’ll always been peering over motherfucker’s shoulder. I guess Hollywood can break love as fast as it makes love and her being single is probably a good thing because she looks like a total slut.

Posted in:Annoying Relationship|Rachel Bilson

2008

17

Apr

Rachel Bilson’s Blonde Hair Looks Like Shit of the Day

Rachel Bilson obviously got a new role playing someone who has no sex appeal and proves that the whole blondes have more fun expression isn’t the case for everyone. She’s more like blondes who mistakenly got their hair dyed in hopes of having more fun, but shit backfired and now she’s stuck hiding out at home or wearing hats out in public because her hair dresser said if she dyes her hair again it will all fall out….

I had a little altercation with a fake blonde Jewish girl the other day. I feel like I wrote this story out yesterday about running into her on my daily coffee excursion but I can’t seem to find it anywhere, so maybe I didn’t. I’ll keep it short.

So I’m getting my coffee and these two Jewish twenty somethings are talking about how great their lives are. They are talking about their weddings and how amazing the honeymoon was, and pretty much being competitive in their boring married by 25 way. They started talking about how happy they were for following the suburban template where you marrying after university and have kids after working a few years and realize that it sucks and raise those kids the same way they were raised with vacations, private schools and summer camp.

I didn’t really pay attention, but about 5 minutes into their conversation I could tell that they were being cunts towards mutual highschool friends who to them weren’t up to par. Some were still in University after 5 years, some dropped out to go to trade school or work for family, others fell off track because of boyfriends, others who were into partying and living off their trust funds and would never amount to shit and that’s when I got annoyed. I hate people who think they are better than other people because they followed the traditional boring path in life and have no concept of having a little adventure or creating their own destiny. I also hate people who are boring and have boring conversations about how great they are because they followed the traditional path in life all while doing it loud enough for me and everyone to hear, like we weren’t even in their self absorbed world revolves around them coffee shop…

I decided to chime in and said something along the lines of “Shit, I didn’t realize that Jews had their own Mother Theresa and that she should really become a life coach because her life is so fuckin’ great, but be sure to not teach shit about lookin’ good in those courses because you look like something scraped out of the Holocaust oven that shouldn’t have been salvaged”. They didn’t laugh and tried to get my name for a hate crime, but I told her I am not anti-semetic, I just hate annoying cunts. That’s when I walked out flustered and realized that I may be a little too high strung or bitter that my life was more of a nightmare than a Fairytale like theirs was….that’s when I started to cry.

Either way, here’s Rachel Bilson lookin’ like shit.

Posted in:Blonde|Rachel Bilson

2008

07

Mar

Rachel Bilson’s Ass in Jeans of the Day

These are some pictures of Rachel Bilson doing some Anna Nicole Smith high class escorting that they pretend is love for the public because it turns out people are pretty judgmental when it comes to unconventional relationships. No one ever thinks that maybe bitch just has grandfather issues because he was never there for her growing up, he was too busy dying before she was born and this is her time to fill that empty void. Instead they just look at his bank account and figure that she’s just on a higher salary then at the strip club they met in and is just doing it for the money and not the hot arthritic sex they have. I can only assume people are just jealous because they never found a love so pure.

That said, Rachel Bilson is up on the same game, only she’s actually doing it with her real life grandfather and who are we to criticize. Sure the media, our western morals and scientific evidence say that it breeds retards and tells us that incest is wrong, but does that factor in her happiness from finding true love. I wanna know what love is and I want you to show me.

Posted in:Ass|Denim|Rachel Bilson

2007

14

Nov

I am – Rachel Bilson Does Santa Claus of the Day

rachel_bilson_santa_top.jpg

There was a time when I used to dress up as Santa Claus at some shitty discount strip mall to make some extra money because Christmas is expensive, even when you don’t buy anyone in your family gifts because you hate them.

I used to sit there thinking about how much I’d rather have the mother’s of these annoying crying kids sitting on my lap asking me for dirty things for Christmas, that’s how I got through the job, but also the reason I got fired, because one time I had a little too much to drink before my shift and this slutty mother with the biggest tits walked up to me, put her kid on my lap and bent over, tits hanging out trying to calm her kid and my mind started racing and I got a boner…..the boss wasn’t impressed that Santa practically came all over his bright red suit like he was coming to town, while a 4 year old was on his lap.

I guess even ghetto stores frown on pedophilia, even when the whole concept of Santa is one of a man who sneaks into homes and lures little boys and girls with presents their parents can’t affort, like this dude I met who hangs with teenage boys and buys them things in exchange for them cleaning his house in their underwear…..

Either way, Rachel Bilson is one of those girl’s I wouldn’t mind giving my candy cane to, and by candy cane I mean impregnating her with tongue, because my penis doesn’t work, unfortunately for her, my rotting mouth doesn’t smell like peppermint, but she can always pretend. Cuddles.


Related Posts:

Rachel Bilson and Her Dog
Rachel Bilson Eating Cheetos
Rachel Bilson is Fucking Hayden Christensen

Posted in:Hot|Rachel Bilson|Unsorted

2007

03

Oct

I am – Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen Are Fuckin’ of the Day

rachel_bilson_bf.jpg

I always rip into ginger-haired people for scaring the fuck out of me and people get mad thinking I am some kind of racist against people with orange hair….which I guess I kinda am because I am scared of them, but when you hear about people being scared of clowns or spiders or rape, they get a lot less hate than I do when I say that their transparent eyelashes and eyebrows, pale freckled color skin and insane strength from being coded genetically differently than normal humans because their breed used to be seen as devil children and left in the woods to fend for themselves and that’s why the ones you see today are from the “surviving” gingers.

Either way, I was checking out a tight bodied chick in leggings, like every fucking girl in this city wears, which I find really un-fucking-inspiring even though I can make out every dimple in her ass and usually what her pussy looks like, but I still like a little variety and seeing everyone dressed the same is some serious laziness that girls need to put a stop too, we get it, shit’s comfortable and kinda hot and all your friends are doing it, but you could at least fucking try to be your own person.

Regardless, I’m checking out her ass in her leggings and some fucking Ginger comes out of nowhere, like they often do, because they are sneaky as fuck and I was tempted to save her from him because I know when ginger’s are linked up with girls they’re trouble, but then dude slid is hand on her tight 19 year old ass, and she looked and him and lovingly smiled. I was trying to figure out whether she did it because she knew if she didn’t he’d lock her in her cage, or maybe she was color blind and didn’t notice the fact that his hair was orange and skin see-through and splotchy, but then I came to terms with the fact that he probably has rich parents and he probably buys her shit to keep her around….

I kinda feel like the same kind of thing is going on with Rachel Bilson and the dude from Star Wars. Looking at them together makes me feel kinda sick, but then I realize that he probably buys her nice things, and girls like nice things….so no chance of your hurtbag ass to ever get a quality chick to use you, but I did see an episode of Jerry where some ghetto black girl bragged about her boyfriend buying her fried chicken and I’m not even joking or trying to make a racial slur. Sometimes the funniest things in life write themselves….thanks for the laughs Bilson…..

Rachel Bilson Hard Nipple Picture
Rachel Bilson Eats Cheetos With Her Daughter….Who Isn’t Her Daughter….
Mischa Barton’s Ass in Leggings…
Mischa Barton’s Dumpy Ass and Legs Pictures

Posted in:Hayden Chistensen|Love|Rachel Bilson|Relationship|Unsorted

2007

03

Oct

I am – Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen Are Fuckin' of the Day

rachel_bilson_bf.jpg

I always rip into ginger-haired people for scaring the fuck out of me and people get mad thinking I am some kind of racist against people with orange hair….which I guess I kinda am because I am scared of them, but when you hear about people being scared of clowns or spiders or rape, they get a lot less hate than I do when I say that their transparent eyelashes and eyebrows, pale freckled color skin and insane strength from being coded genetically differently than normal humans because their breed used to be seen as devil children and left in the woods to fend for themselves and that’s why the ones you see today are from the “surviving” gingers.

Either way, I was checking out a tight bodied chick in leggings, like every fucking girl in this city wears, which I find really un-fucking-inspiring even though I can make out every dimple in her ass and usually what her pussy looks like, but I still like a little variety and seeing everyone dressed the same is some serious laziness that girls need to put a stop too, we get it, shit’s comfortable and kinda hot and all your friends are doing it, but you could at least fucking try to be your own person.

Regardless, I’m checking out her ass in her leggings and some fucking Ginger comes out of nowhere, like they often do, because they are sneaky as fuck and I was tempted to save her from him because I know when ginger’s are linked up with girls they’re trouble, but then dude slid is hand on her tight 19 year old ass, and she looked and him and lovingly smiled. I was trying to figure out whether she did it because she knew if she didn’t he’d lock her in her cage, or maybe she was color blind and didn’t notice the fact that his hair was orange and skin see-through and splotchy, but then I came to terms with the fact that he probably has rich parents and he probably buys her shit to keep her around….

I kinda feel like the same kind of thing is going on with Rachel Bilson and the dude from Star Wars. Looking at them together makes me feel kinda sick, but then I realize that he probably buys her nice things, and girls like nice things….so no chance of your hurtbag ass to ever get a quality chick to use you, but I did see an episode of Jerry where some ghetto black girl bragged about her boyfriend buying her fried chicken and I’m not even joking or trying to make a racial slur. Sometimes the funniest things in life write themselves….thanks for the laughs Bilson…..

Rachel Bilson Hard Nipple Picture
Rachel Bilson Eats Cheetos With Her Daughter….Who Isn’t Her Daughter….
Mischa Barton’s Ass in Leggings…
Mischa Barton’s Dumpy Ass and Legs Pictures

Posted in:Hayden Chistensen|Love|Rachel Bilson|Relationship|Unsorted

2007

11

Jun

I am – Rachel Bilson Eating Cheetos of the Day

rachel_bilson_cheetos_top.jpg

My wife won a 2 week cruise that she can’t go on in July. I am trying to find someone to update this site when I don’t have internet access and I figure the more posts I can get on the site and the more help I get the lazier I can be. There are no guarantees but I am trying people out and this is a submission about Mila Kunis…

I can’t believe you actually posted those two submissions ahead of mine. Those posts were average at best, and when I say “average at best” I really mean “sucked more cock than Lindsey Lohan could ever hope to”.

I figure the only reason you didnt like my clearly top notch writing was that I didnt set the submissions to some lame ass pics that you lifted from some even more lame ass website.

So here goes: this post will be about the Rachel Bilson set of pics. You’ll just have to remember the pics, because I am to lazy to attach them to my submission. Get over it ass-wipe.

So here is Rachel Bilson showing us just enough skin to remind us that we still want to see her naked. This cunt is one the new group of hollywood bitches that has gotten famous but has had the disgusting amount of nerve to never show us her rack or herpes infected twat.

Also Included in this blue-ball inducing group are Sarah Michelle Gellar, Jennifer Love Hewitt, and Jessica Alba just to name 3, but there many more. What happened to the days where if a bitch wanted to even think of an acting career she had to show skin and plenty of it in her early work? It really pisses me off, because all of these chicks are way hot, and by not getting naked they are costing me some serious jerking off time. Whores.

Admit it you cocksucker, this post written off the top of my head with no forethought, and written out of pure aggravation after reading those other 2 grade-school shit-stains, is so much better it shopuld embarass you. What, did these girls blow you or something? Well, you can forget that asshole. I dont swing that way, except for that one time in college when I lost the worst bet of my life, but gave someone else a night to remember.

This one was a little better. I’ll admit that it is about half way to where I want it to be because I don’t know if this is a dude writing or a chick and that makes me feel uncomfortable when he/she talks about losing bets in college that lead to blowjobs. What doesn’t make me uncomfortable is seeing this Rachel Bilson on my wife’s diet, realizing that she doesn’t have to be hot and skinny anymore and taking advantage of the time off to get nice a fat.

Posted in:Eating|Rachel Bilson|Uncategorized|Unsorted