Dancing Archives - Page 3 of 3 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

22

May

I am – Eva Longoria Peepin’ Dance Pics of the Day

This shit reminds me of voyeur porn. The kind that is usually staged but you like to think it isn’t, of girls taking showers or getting changed. I am not talking the voyeur porn where creeps go out with their cameras and try to sneak upskirts and shit because that kinda stuff is a little too stalker for me. I am more into stalking useless celebrities that everyone seems to care about, because at least they are getting paid to entertain me and aren’t some innocent girls walking up the stairs at the mall for people like you to snap shots of. I have morals….

Either way, this through the door Longoria dancing shit makes me laugh because there was a time that all I would look up was this kind of shit. Normally it would end with her giving the dude a blowjob or some shit, but bitch has an image to keep up or something.

Posted in:Dancing|Desperate Housewives|Eva Longoria|Unsorted

2007

22

May

I am – Eva Longoria Peepin' Dance Pics of the Day

No Comments »

This shit reminds me of voyeur porn. The kind that is usually staged but you like to think it isn’t, of girls taking showers or getting changed. I am not talking the voyeur porn where creeps go out with their cameras and try to sneak upskirts and shit because that kinda stuff is a little too stalker for me. I am more into stalking useless celebrities that everyone seems to care about, because at least they are getting paid to entertain me and aren’t some innocent girls walking up the stairs at the mall for people like you to snap shots of. I have morals….

Either way, this through the door Longoria dancing shit makes me laugh because there was a time that all I would look up was this kind of shit. Normally it would end with her giving the dude a blowjob or some shit, but bitch has an image to keep up or something.

Posted in:Dancing|Desperate Housewives|Eva Longoria|Unsorted

2007

08

May

I am – Britney Spears Comeback Tour in Vegas Pics of the Day

1 Comment »

These are some shitty cellphone pics of Britney Spears lip syncing in Vegas as part of her attempt at a comeback, the show may have been a rip off and she may be insane now, but she’s still Britney Spears and at least she’s showing off her ass to distract us all from how lame this attempt to climb out of the gutter and back to the top of her game is.

I am costantly attacked by feminists, telling me how what I do is comparable to racism and that I am leading a horrible example to the 20 people who read the site, and I guess saying that at least Britney is showing us her ass fall into that category of objectifying women.

Reality is, I am not the motherfucker on stage showing the world my fucking ass, and if I was, I’d expect someone to comment on how fat it is. I have spent a lifetime trying to seduce girls and not being rich enough, or goodlooking enough, forcing me to end up with someone no one wanted, not even me, but the comfort of having someone there to care was enough for me to do it. You don’t see me sitting here hating on all the hot chicks for not wanting me, or thinking I was scum, in all reality, I am here begging for them to send me nudes.

So, what it all comes down to, is that I just want to have a good time, maybe have a few laughs, and talk a whole lot of shit about nothing important. If you are one to take my words for gospel and either take it home with you to throw at your own fat wife that you settled with, or who got fat after she hooked you in and was too tired to keep herself pretty, or if you are sitting there getting offended by what I have to say, all you have to do is click on the back button in your browser and leave your rants to your fucking self, because people that are that uptight, are people I don’t want to invite to my birthday party or to my comeback show at a shitty small venue….and if you motherfuckers decide to show up with camera phone pics, and decide to write slandering remarks about me, I am not going to cry about it and write a thesis for my gender studies class on how hard people are on me for having a cock.

2007

07

May

I am – Brooke Hogan Dancing Around in her Underwear of the Day

65 Comments »

I know that a girl in her underwear is enough to make you happy. I know that you’re one of those guys at the strip club who sits by the stage clapping and urging the bitches on. It’s people like you that fuck it up for the rest of us, because it gives them a false sense of worth, making them feel pretty and wanted and putting them on a some kind of ego trip, making them forget they are whores.

So these pictures of Brooke Hogan make you happy, because a girl in underwear is better than a girl in clothes especially on the internet.

When I look at these pictures, I just remember a fat girl trying to get skinny to have a career, and when she reached her ideal weight, she decided to get naked, in hopes of getting assholes like you, who are easy to fucking please at her show.

I am not saying I wouldn’t stuff her like a turkey if I had the chance, I am just saying that bitch has no business doing whatever it is that she does, and being Hulk Hogan’s shadow, is probably not a place anyone should be, because he’s a piece of Florida trash with big biceps, stupid hair and crazy pants….and she may not be wearing crazy pants, but bitch could probably beat the fuck out of me with legs like that. Ya’ Heard?

I forgot where I was going with this, because I am drunk, but I do hate people who cheer on strippers, because it makes getting a lap dance next to impossible….Cuddles….

2006

23

Jan

People Who Can’t Dance

8 Comments »

I was away the last 3 days. I went to ski country with my stepdaughters. Their hot little school friends have a condo up on the ski hill and I guess we were invited out of pity, or whatever it’s called when middle class people who own a car and a condo and a house in the suburbs invite a useless unemployed mexican to their ski lodge. Point of this story is to say that I hit up the only bar at the bottom of the mountain when everyone was in bed and I realized how pathetic I am. The bar was filled with people who couldn’t dance. That got me to thinking, I should record these ppl dancing, so I order a couple of shots of JD, run back to the condo I’m staying at, steal their camera and this is what I got. I also landed some nasty fucking cold/flu and I am lying in bed sweating as I write this, and it’s not because my fat wife doubles as a fucking furnace.

Ignore the horrible quality and bad editing. I am Jesus Martinez, bitches, low quality is what I do.

Watch My Video Here

Posted in:can't dance|Dancing|hot sluts|Unsorted|young sluts

2006

23

Jan

People Who Can't Dance

No Comments »

I was away the last 3 days. I went to ski country with my stepdaughters. Their hot little school friends have a condo up on the ski hill and I guess we were invited out of pity, or whatever it’s called when middle class people who own a car and a condo and a house in the suburbs invite a useless unemployed mexican to their ski lodge. Point of this story is to say that I hit up the only bar at the bottom of the mountain when everyone was in bed and I realized how pathetic I am. The bar was filled with people who couldn’t dance. That got me to thinking, I should record these ppl dancing, so I order a couple of shots of JD, run back to the condo I’m staying at, steal their camera and this is what I got. I also landed some nasty fucking cold/flu and I am lying in bed sweating as I write this, and it’s not because my fat wife doubles as a fucking furnace.

Ignore the horrible quality and bad editing. I am Jesus Martinez, bitches, low quality is what I do.

Watch My Video Here

Posted in:can't dance|Dancing|hot sluts|Unsorted|young sluts