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Archive for the Paddle Surf Category

2010

15

Mar

Julie Bowen’s Weird Ass Paddle Surfs of the Day

Julie Bowen, a woman I had never heard of until a week ago because I don’t watch TV, has been confusing me the last week by wearing her bikini on the beach and forcing me to post on her.

I don’t find her hot, I don’t find her interesting, and now she’s doing the stupidest activity you can possibly do on the beach, but I feel obligated to put these because a woman in a bikini, no matter how old or disgusting is still a woman in a bikini and that’s always something semi-interesting even if it really isn’t….

I am actually pretty bitter about bikinis today, I read somewhere that it is spring break, which means that somewhere college kids are waking up and puking in the pool, only to head back to their hotel room later today to fuck multiple drunk chicks in bikinis, cuz everyone’s horny on spring break and I’m not….

Pics via PacificCoastNews and
Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Julie Bowen|Modern Family|Paddle Surf

2010

25

Jan

Alessandra Ambrosio Paddle Surfs in a Bikini of the Day

Some people save up their money all year to get the chance to go on some really shitty, yet affordable All Inclusive resort. The kind of 2 star resort that has shittier conditions thatn Haiti. I’m talking run down, filled with racist trailer trash, with hepatitis ice cubes in the watered down drinks, only to get diarhea the first day of your trip and all your worldly possessions stolen the second day and a horrible sun burn the third day, setting you up for the worst fucking trip in history, but you won’t admit it because you saved all your money to go on this shit and there’s no way you’ll admit you had a bad time.

Other people get paid 5 times your yearly salary to do a photoshoot in the nice islands that don’t smell like AIDS, that also includes 5 star accommodations, gourmet meals and everything else that you could imagine on you dream vacation….because those people look like Alessandra Ambrosio and not like your wife or any of the trash that has let you put your dick in them. Life is unfair, get over it….

Here she is doing a little paddle surfing…..cuz she’s clearly a faggot….you know since paddle surfing was invented by faggots for faggots like Fubu but less black…even though the only people I knew who ever wore Fubu were white poor kids who got made when I’d tell them shit was made for black people…but you get what I mean….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|Bikini|Paddle Surf