The biggest news that happened to me was when I looked out my window last night at 3 in the morning and some long-legged, probably barely 18 year old girl was passed out in a thrown out chair, stood up and took a piss on the sidewalk, with people passing her by, only to pass back out in the chair someone had thrown out, cuz maybe their grandmother died on it or some shit, and here this girl was…Shit made me fall in love with the ghetto I live in all over again….

But apparently, the world doesn’t revolve around me and my stories, so here are some things going on in the news….

Teen Convicted for Hitting Classmate in Face with Ax
The 16 year old from Hanover sliced the face of a classmate with an ax in a tractor supply store. He has been locked up since October, and will now be kept in juvenile confinement for 2 years.

Teen Says MySpace Date Led To Stabbing
A 17-year-old Fairfax County girl wound up in the hospital with stab wounds after arranging a date on MySpace, the social networking site. The girl told police she was also raped.

Denny’s Worker Behind Bars for Spiking Drinks
In a Spotsylvania County Denny’s, a worker is put behind bars for spiking the drinks of two co-workers with bleach, acting on a grudge he had with them.

Naked Man Attacked Outside Richmond Bar w/ footage
A witness filmed a naked man who was stumbling in the street and was then attacked outside of some bars in Richmond.

PA Teachers Accused Of Eating Kid’s Lunch
Are teachers at a local school helping themselves to free lunches? That is the accusation at one Philadelphia school and a whistleblower says she was fired over it.

Man Accused of Urinating on Boy
A man is accused of a disgusting act at a public pool in Saint Clair Shores. According to Saint Clair Shores Police, he showed his private parts to a seven-year-old boy in the bathroom near the pool. The man then allegedly urinated on the little boy’s shoulder while the child was using the urinal.

Engineering the ‘Ideal Breast’
You see them on runways, in catalogs, and at the beach. Public fascination with breast size and shape has fueled America’s plastic surgery industry.

Teen put Lysol in mom’s Kool-Aid
A New Hampshire teenager was arrested after allegedly putting Lysol in her mother’s drink.

LA Bondage Club Arson-Murder Suspect Arrest
The body of a man in his 50s was found inside a burned-out bondage club near Los Angeles International Airport, and a man recently fired by the club was arrested on suspicion of arson and murder.

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Here is some of the goods going on in the news…..

Darth Vader’ Robs Bank on Long Island

A man wearing a Darth Vader mask and cape robbed a Chase bank branch on Long Island on Thursday, police said. The thief entered a branch in Setauket at 11:30 a.m. and demanded money from a teller. But instead of using a light saber, “Darth” threatened the teller with a semiautomatic gun.

Hilarious! Tennessee’s Next Governor?

Basil Marceaux, or as he calls himself BasilMarceaux.com, may be the last and only hope in the upcoming Tennessee race for Governor.

Man Flashes Woman on Beach

A man who works as a social worker was arrested for indecent exposure after asking a woman to take his picture and then flashing her.

Man took photos, exposed self to kids

Police are looking for a man they say is taking pictures of kids at a local park – and that’s not all

Man Gropes Woman at Brooklyn Laundry

A 19-year-old woman was folding her clothes at the Laundromat she goes to every few weeks. This past Monday morning, she was attacked, groped by a man who also rubbed up against her.

Rape Victim Says She?s Being Stalked

For two hours he raped her repeatedly in a field. That was more than a year ago. Since then he’s been stalking, taunting and threatening her on Facebook.

CT Man Attacks Women with Baseball Bat

A Connecticut man attacked two ex-girlfriends with a baseball bat when found out they were meeting to talk about him

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Here are some lovely and beautiful stories the caught my eye today…let them inspire you and remind you that we’re not all going to be ok….

Woman Flips Out on Camera Crew in Iowa

The mother of an accused vandal physically pushes a camera crew off her property and then the accused vandal throws eggs at the camera crew

Mother Upset Teen Daughter Propositioned for Sex by TN Cop

UT Prisoner in Trouble for Writing a Cat

A Utah prisoner is in trouble for writing the cat belonging to his wife, asking her not to testify against him in court

Feces Problem Closing Pools in Cedar Rapids, Iowa

Intense Police Confrontation in Columbus, OH

An Ohio man pulled over for a hit and run goes after a police officer and it’s all caught on the dash cam.

http://www.redlasso.com/ClipPlayer.aspx?id=950cf501-c52b-41cf-80be-a2876b778492

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Here’s some amazingness going on in the beautifully retarded world we live in….

Parasailing Donkey in Russia

Police have opened an inquiry into animal abuse after a donkey, attached to a parachute and pulled by a motorboat, flew over a Krasnodar beach for a half hour in a publicity stunt gone bad

Mothers Selling Bootleg Breast Milk on Facebook

Washington Moms who have problem producing breast milk are looking on Facebook to find bootlegged breast milk….and they are finding it for $3 an ounce

Marijuana Falls from East Texas Sky

It was raining marijuana in a rural area of east Texas.

Video of Ohio Stiletto Attack Released

Several women in Dayton viciously attacked a man with the Stiletto heels they were wearing

MA Cop leaves beat to see dwarf porn star

A Stoughton police officer is accused of leaving his beat to attend a special appearance of “Bridget The Midget,” the woman billed as “the world’s smallest porn star.”

Jailer Fired for Watching Women Shower

A Dallas County Sheriff’s Lieutenant is out of a job after the department says he used jail cameras to watch female inmates in the shower.

Police Arrest Man for Trying to Smuggle 18 Monkeys Into Mexico

A man jammed 18 live monkeys into his shirt in an attempt to smuggle them into Mexico.

Posted in:stepNEWS

Here is some shit going on in the news….

Video of Swedish Helicopter Heist Caught on CCTV

Dramatic footage has been released of a daring commando-style heist in Sweden, last year. Thanks to tip offs from Serbian police ten people have been charged in connection with the job, but only they know where the money is hidden and as yet they aren’t telling the cops. Their trial is due to start next month. If found guilty, the men face prison terms of up to 10 years. Nine of the suspects are Swedes and one is Syrian. They all deny the charges.

Nigerian Couple Gives Birth to White Baby

Genetics experts are baffled as to how a Nigerian couple in England are parents of a blonde haired blue eyed Caucasian baby girl

Girl Scout Cookie Thief Steals $8000 worth of Cookies
A woman in Ohio could spend up to a year and a half in prison for stealing more than 2300 boxes, or $8000 worth, of Girl Scout cookies

UFO Flying Over China
Video showing what is alleged to be a UFO flying in Chinese airspace.

Unfortunately…Lohan isn’t just a bratty starlet we want to hate fuck…but she’s also in the news…cuz her publicity stunt is working….

Lindsay Lohan Walks into Court

Lindsay Lohan turned herself in at the Beverly Hills Court, getting a confetti bomb on the way

Lindsay Lohan in Courtroom to Surrender

A nervous Lindsay Lohan is ordered to be remanded by the judge

Michael Lohan’s Mouthpiece Makes a Statement
Reporters and camera snap at each other as Michael Lohan’s attorney makes a statement on his behalf

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Here is some shit going on in the news….

Homeless Man Attacks Girls In NYC Park

PA Man Lied About Age to Have Sex with Teen Girls

Detroit Man Wrecks His Ex’s Car and Causes Huge Wreck
A domestic dispute ends with a big fender bender in Redford- involving multiple vehicles.

Sex Chat Industry Excited About New iPhone 4
Video chat software is concerning to parents but appealing to the porn industry

Candy Bar Fight Leads to Drug Arrest in WV
Adam Briggs and his girlfriend Audrey Lane of Chicago were arrested West Virginia after getting into a fist fight in a moving car that started over a candy bar. The couple “showed tremendous interest” in getting their 1999 Buick out of the impound lot, including allegedly offering money to the owner of the lot. It turns out a massive amount of drugs and cash were in the car.

Bikini burglars strike in Brevard County Florida
Deputies with Brevard County Sheriff are on the look out for two bikini wearing thieves.

Reporter Slams into Skateboarding Kid on Live TV
Charley from Tampa’s Fox 13 tries to cross a skating ramp at a bad time and someone gets hurt

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The news depresses some…….I am not one of those people. I find shit hysterical…

Here is today’s news…

Brazilian mode Sheyla Hershey was attempting to break the world record for breast size, now those implants could kill her

Texas Daycare Investigated Over R-Rated Field Trip
A Texas Daycare is being investigated after they took their children to see the R-rated movie, Death at a Funeral.

Dallas Man Arrested for Soliciting Prostitute with Infant in Car

TN Man Arrested for Sexually Assaulting Woman at Church

PA Woman Arrested for Epileptic Seizure
A Mt. Lebanon woman was roughed up by police while suffering a seizure because they thought she was on drugs, now she’s suing.

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I took a break from the news because I found it too depressing….but then realized I shouldn’t be such a pussy and I shouldn’t take other people’s issues seriously, but with the closing up of the oil spill and the dying down of emotions from the MJ death anniversary, I have found a new lease on life and here are some fun stepNEWS stories to remind us the world is worth laughing at……

Taliban training monkeys to attack US troops in Afghanistan?

Man Accused of Fondling Woman at Church

Pittsburgh Man Kills Wife’s Lover

CA Airport Janitor Arrested for Cell Phone Peeping

Breastfeeding moms gather for nurse-in Orlando Saturday

MA Man’s ear bitten off at BBQ

Woman Falls to Death on Rollercoaster Which Proves Amusement parks a good place to take your wife for a fun activity if like me you hate your wife…

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Here is some shit going on in the news….cuz this is the world we are a part of….and despite hating everyone I know or I have met…there’s just something about it that I love…

CT Priest Accused of Stealing $1 Million from Church for Gay Sex Romps

St. Louis Prostitute Attacks Man, Steals His Car

HIV Positive Prostitute Arrested in St. Louis

Man Threatens Rape Victim

Women in the Dallas area are horrified to learn that a man thought to be a friend to them was secretly taping them in his room.

Blackmailers are now hacking into computers to extort nude photos of young men and women to get them to perform sex acts on webcams. Police have started to crack down on this new crime. I need to get into this now….

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You may take breaks or days off because you’re a lazy fucking pig with no drive, ambition or purpose- but the news never does….so here’s some of the latest goin on in the hopeless world we live in…

Viagra Increases Rate of STDs

Indiana Man Upset Son Sees Porn on iPad at Best Buy
A demo iPad featured a photo of a man’s genitals when a boy saw the image at the Indiana store.

The 20-year-old man, who wants to remain anonymous, but calls himself the Viper, recently caught the attention of police in Columbia, Tennessee. Officers stopped the man just after midnight Wednesday when they spotted him in this costume.

Fake Mouse Trick on Red Sox Announcer

Reality TV NEWS – Cuz It May Not Be Real – But it is Fucking Stupid

Jake and Vienna Awkward Reunion on The Bachelor

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