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Archive for the Stifler Category

2008

13

Jun

Stifler Fucked Jessica Simpson of the Day

Stifler from American Pie gets asked about why Nick Lachey hates him in some interview and says because he fucked Jessica Simpson, I am assuming it went down when they were shooting Dukes of Hazard because otherwise I don’t see why Jessica Simpson would hang out with him, but it is possible that he told her that he was Brad Pitt or some shit, because I heard that’s the line the craft services dude used and she gave him a rim job and Johnny Knoxville go up in her because he told her that he was Elvis.

She’s probably the easiest girl to manipulate into the bedroom even when married and that just proves that you should never marry a virgin or someone who claims to be a virgin because they are either a slut hiding the truth or a slut in the making who hasn’t had a taste yet and once you give her one, she goes crazy.

I don’t know if Jessica Simpson was married to Nick Lachey for any other reason than rockin’ a TV show with him to help take both of their careers to a new Christian level and considering Nick Lachey is a poofter and likes cock not slot, I don’t really see why he’d give a shit about who she fucks but apparently he does, it must be because he has been crushing on Stifler for years and Jessica totally knew it and still went out and fucked him, knowing it would devestate Nick because life is not fair, but on the positive side of things, at least now his masturbation fantasies of Stifler can be set to Jessica’s inside scoop and description of Stifler’s dick, instead of to the pictures Nick made of Stiffler and him by cropping their faces onto hardcore gay porn pics.

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