I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Uncategorized Category

2006

15

Dec

I am – Kelly Clarkson’s Fat Ass of the Day

kellyclarksonTOP.jpg

Since she’s been gone, she’s been eating lots of cake…. I knew this girl was a little heavy in her pants but i had no idea she was this down-loaded. Down-loaded is an expression used for girls who are heavy from the waist down. I know that it’s a pretty weak expression that I used to use in the 90s on a girl I once knew who was built like a tonka truck in designer jeans but was hot from the waist up. She would have made a great news anchor but I think she ended up working construction, which made sense considering she was a good lifter.

I went to the strippers last night, I drank too much, I have indigestion. It was worth it. Cuddles.


Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

15

Dec

I am – Kelly Clarkson's Fat Ass of the Day

kellyclarksonTOP.jpg

Since she’s been gone, she’s been eating lots of cake…. I knew this girl was a little heavy in her pants but i had no idea she was this down-loaded. Down-loaded is an expression used for girls who are heavy from the waist down. I know that it’s a pretty weak expression that I used to use in the 90s on a girl I once knew who was built like a tonka truck in designer jeans but was hot from the waist up. She would have made a great news anchor but I think she ended up working construction, which made sense considering she was a good lifter.

I went to the strippers last night, I drank too much, I have indigestion. It was worth it. Cuddles.


Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

15

Dec

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

I got a haircut today and it was pretty fucking exciting. If you are wondering how I could afford a haircut, it’s pretty simple, I haven’t cut my hair in 6 years and it was long and fucking disgusting, so I made my way to the cancer charity and shaved my head for free. I feel sorry for whoever ends up with my hair as their wig because it may give them herpes B, that’s the shit that I heard some dude caught from a pet Monkey and it destroyed his vital organs. I guess since they’ve already got cancer, the diseases and bugs that they can land from my hair is the least of my concerns. Point of all this is to say…I am just doing my part this festive time of year….

Speaking of doing my part, check out Britney’s Nips and the other amazing links I brought you today. It’s a Chrsitmas Miracle…CUDDLES.


Britney Spears Show’s Off Some Nipple (Scroll Down For HQ)
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The Dr Phil Footage I wrote about 2 Days Ago
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A bunch of dirty girls dressed like school girls
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Ask Kat for Some Solid Advice
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Fat Guy in the Shower…
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Jessica Simpson’s Cameltoe
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Lacy Chabert in Maxim Pics
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This Video is Called I Love Dr Phil
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Download Jennifer Love Hewitt Accepting Some Award..
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Jordan’s Upskirt Showing Off Her Vagina Tattoo
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Honda’s Robot Demo Doesn’t Work Out So Well For Them
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Gemma Atkinson is Santa’s Little Helper with Tits
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Madonna Doesn’t Like Jokes About Her Black Baby…
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Jessica Biel Walks her Dog and Wipes her Nose and People Post This Shit Because That’s How Pathetic Our Lives Have Become…
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Big Foot Pleasuring a Unicorn
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Top 5 Tattooed Celebrity Asses
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Carmella DeCesare is some Slag in a Bikini
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Some Band Covers Bohemian Rhapsody and It’s Annoying as Fuck
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An Interview with Kal Penn
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Bastardly OC – Taylor vs. Summer vs. Kaitlyn Post of the 16 year old girl in all of you
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Amateur Indian Babe Getting Fucked (porn)
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LastNightsParty NSFW in Miami. I think I already Posted This.. But There’s Tits so Click..
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Immigrant Girls Undressing Some Girl Named Lucie…
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JuliesRoom.net does Amateur Porn Vidoes…That You WIll Masturbate to
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Don’t Tell Posh Spice that she is Ugly
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Oh So Sexy Coco doing a Dance in Front of a Car
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Rebecca is the Human Can Opener
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Someone Buy me This Cellphone So I can Blog On the Road
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Naturists Swimming…
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Nerdcore for Life Trailer
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Here are some Young Tits…
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Tom Papa has a Funny Stand-Up Act on Conan…
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Rachel Stevens – Out and About
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Should Nicole Richie Go To Jail….Who Cares…
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Nip/Tuck Lip Syncing Scene That I Don’t Understand…
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stepMUSIC: EDITORS-“All Sparks” (Phones Remix):
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stepMUSIC: GRAHAM COXON (OF BLUR) “TELL IT LIKE IT IS”
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stepMUSIC: Toby Lightman “My Sweet Song�
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Some Japanese Idol in her Bikini at the Pool is the Most Viewed YouTube Video Today…
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This May Be Your Last Chance To Get 3 Bottles for the Price of 1
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

14

Dec

I am – Marcia Cross is a Lesbian of the Day

Marcia Cross Lesbian

I was too lazy to research this today, but I think these are pics of Marcia Cross and her Girlfriend. I remember reading that she was a lesbian and that she was pregnant and I don’t know how that happens but I do know that at first glance you’d assume that this is her mom or sister because of the red hair. What you don’t know is that redheads are a breed of their own and they stick together. I remember knowing a redhead in highschool and he was fucking strong. He looked like some computer programming motherfucker but if you teased him he’d go fucking nuts. I was told that the reason he was so strong was because in historical times a redheaded baby was thought to be the devil and they’d live them out in the woods to fend for themselves. So the ones who survived were stronger than normal people and as they reproduced the redhead strong gene trickled down the line. Point of all this is that they band together because they know they are there own special kind of person.

Speaking of special kind of person and lesbians, here’s an email I got about a link to a Tranny I knowingly posted yesterday…..

I’m just a noobie to the site you have so gratiously provided the internet with, and I hate to nitpick, but lets be real. Under your links there is a “Hot myspace girl”, and below “Her personal website”.

Naturally, I, being a college male figure “Why the hell not”. Upon inspection I see that this person is very old compared to me and is quite the non-looker. Very drag-queen-like make up.

Moreover, on the person’s website there is *ahem* a “Services” section. Upon which, I could not help but click – because what could someone so cracked-out possibly provide the internet world.

And let me tell you dude – do not EVER get drunk and go to a bar in New York City, because in her services she provides SHE-MALE CONTACT!

ITS A FUCKIN DUDE!!!! NOT A HOT MYSPACE CHICK!!!!!!

Well, enjoy scrubbing your wang furiously in the shower if you’ve already beaten off to her..him…it?

Just thought you Should Know

Thanks dude….

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

14

Dec

I am – Salma Hayek’s Boobs of the Day

Salma Hayek BOOBS

I haven’t really figured out why I gave MUNG the opportunity to post once a week, I think it had to do with how good he was in the comments and how he was eager to help me out. Since I do this stupid site alone, it makes for a lot of fucking writing and I wanted to take focus away from me, or find someone to take over if I ever hit it big and win a trip somewhere. I should have learned to trust my instincts and stick to my own posts because MUNG has only made me laugh once since he started this, but I can’t shut him down now, we’re in too deep. Here’s his post for the week.

I am kinda glad that my one true fan missed me. Someday I may travel to Argentina on a motorcycle like Che Guevera did in Motorcycle Diaries and visit you and watch your band play my ballad while I wear a beret. Until that time though, I can only imagine that you look like Salma Hayek. The main reason I can only picture you as Salma Hayek is because I know that in real life you have a mustache, smell like moneterey jack cheese, and your vagina looks like when you go to squirt hot sauce on an open-faced chili cheese burrito.

Please DeluXXXe Rape Machine, send me pictures. Send them to me and send them to Jesus.
I would love to see what you look like. Rescue me from this dungeon I call my parents basement and take me on the road with your band. I want to see the Argentinian landscape. I want to watch a prostitute have sex with a donkey….but more importantly I want to see the birthplace of Evita. Take me with you and make me your roadie.

Your Argentinian Prince,

MUNG

Thanks for nothing MUNG…Here are some more pics…


Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

14

Dec

I am – Salma Hayek's Boobs of the Day

Salma Hayek BOOBS

I haven’t really figured out why I gave MUNG the opportunity to post once a week, I think it had to do with how good he was in the comments and how he was eager to help me out. Since I do this stupid site alone, it makes for a lot of fucking writing and I wanted to take focus away from me, or find someone to take over if I ever hit it big and win a trip somewhere. I should have learned to trust my instincts and stick to my own posts because MUNG has only made me laugh once since he started this, but I can’t shut him down now, we’re in too deep. Here’s his post for the week.

I am kinda glad that my one true fan missed me. Someday I may travel to Argentina on a motorcycle like Che Guevera did in Motorcycle Diaries and visit you and watch your band play my ballad while I wear a beret. Until that time though, I can only imagine that you look like Salma Hayek. The main reason I can only picture you as Salma Hayek is because I know that in real life you have a mustache, smell like moneterey jack cheese, and your vagina looks like when you go to squirt hot sauce on an open-faced chili cheese burrito.

Please DeluXXXe Rape Machine, send me pictures. Send them to me and send them to Jesus.
I would love to see what you look like. Rescue me from this dungeon I call my parents basement and take me on the road with your band. I want to see the Argentinian landscape. I want to watch a prostitute have sex with a donkey….but more importantly I want to see the birthplace of Evita. Take me with you and make me your roadie.

Your Argentinian Prince,

MUNG

Thanks for nothing MUNG…Here are some more pics…


Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

14

Dec

I am – Cory Kennedy Taking Over the Hipsters of the Day

Cory Kennedy 16 Year Old Hipster

So there’s a website called thecobrasnake and it’s basically party pictures of some hipster photographer who goes to all the happening events. He hired a 16 year old intern named Cory Kennedy and she’s become some kind of internet phenom with a blog and lots of myspace friends. She’s banging Vincent Gallo and she’s partying with Lohan (see pics) and is the envy of 16 year olds internationally. I decided to email Mark from CobraSnake to see if he could help me make my stepdaughter famous this is what I wrote.

Dear Mark,

I have been getting a lot of annoying emails about the 16 year old girl that you made famous who is banging Vincent Gallo.

The reason I am emailing you is because I have a pretty disgusting 16 year old stepdaughter who resembles a homeless piece of shit too and I would like to make her famous.

I only have 10 readers on my site daily and all of them are perverts so the kind of fame they can offer her is pretty fucking illegal, if you know what I mean. I am impressed with what you did to that homeless girl, I hear she’s got a D&G job lined up and that life on the streets will be no more for her so l figured that maybe you could help me.

I look forward to hearing back from you,

With Love,
Jesus Martinez
Drunkenstepfather.com

This was his response….

16 year old homeless looking girls are the new crazy..
its like pokemon..
collect them all..

Thanks Mark. That was pretty fucking insightful. I can only assume your 16 year old intern wrote that to me and in that case…do you have any nudes.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

13

Dec

I am – Paola Maltese Personal Hot Pics of the Day

Paola Maltese Personal Naked Pics

I just got this email:

she is a famous actress here (paraguay,) she have 2 tv programs, 1 radio program, and she acts in 2 series here.
Her name is Paola Maltese, here are some pics of her:

I was back at the strip club last night because I get in for free and get free drinks from one of the strippers because I told her that I would make her famous and to make a short story shorter I saw a group of college dudes in the VIP area. These college guys were having the time of their lives and they weren’t even rockin’ out with any strippers. They were rockin’ out together…I’m talking one dude who obviously doesn’t know that he was gay, went nuts to one of the songs and started booty dancing and bouncing off his boy’s lap…He played it off as a joke but it seemed pretty homo.

Speaking of homo there was an inuit family, who I guess came into town for the week from the north pole, it is Christmas you know and I hear Santa runs some kind of sweatshop up there and pays them in fish. That was a bad joke, but what wasn’t a joke was that there was 5 generations of inuit men sitting at the table from the 15 year old to the 110 year old great-great grandfather. It’s nice to see families spending time together.

Speaking of Inuits and Strippers and Gays, here is Paola Maltese. Enjoy.

Paola Maltese Personal Naked PicsPaola Maltese Personal Naked PicsPaola Maltese Personal Naked PicsPaola Maltese Personal Naked PicsPaola Maltese Personal Naked PicsPaola Maltese Personal Naked PicsPaola Maltese Personal Naked PicsPaola Maltese Personal Naked Pics

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

13

Dec

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

IMG_1876.jpg

Dr Phil was on Bum Fight Videos. I remember having the concept for a TV show called “What Would A Bum Do For $5”. I obviously never went through with it, cuz I suck at life but the dude who ended up making those videos is a multimillionaire because of them. If I had done the show, I wouldn’t make Bums fight with each other, I’d make them flash people and shit like that. I am more into sex offenders, nudity and hookers than seeing people get hurt. Either way, Dr Phil just kicked the dude off the show because he found him disgusting but the joke was that the dude grew a moustache, shaved male pattern baldness into his head and dressed in a Dr. Phil suit.

He was a piece of useless trash and so are these links and so was the What Would a Bum Do for $5 concept…Frat boys and drunken idiots make the world a dumber fucking place.


Supermarket of the Stars
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Guy Dancing Like a Giant Tickle Me Elmo Because People On the Internet are Fucking Idiots.
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Michelle Trachetenberg is a Hipster and This Site Loves Hipsters
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Billy Idol Does X-Mas
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Aria GIovani Pics Worth Lookin’ At
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Mary Cary Flashing Her Ass
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I want to see this movie, mainly cuz I love drug addicted scenester socialites from the 60s but also cuz I love Sienna Miller
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I didn’t know Hitler was on Meth
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Kate Winslet is a Fatty
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Some Music Video for you to Jerk Off To – Pervert.
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Some Celebrity Ass
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Lohan Wearing an X17 paparazzi Hat. She’s So Funny. Just Always On Point…
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Paris Hilton and her Cat
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Rebecca Loos is the Girl Beckam Cheated on Victoria Beckham With. This is Her in a Bikini…
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Scarlett Johansson’s Vuitton Ad Campaign Pretending to be Marilyn Monroe
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I used to go to an afterhours club that TIGA owned. It was open bar friday nights and it always ended in a disaster. Like Being Punched in the Face By The Cokehead Owner After Sneaking Into The VIP Room because a Guy I worked at a Warehouse With Was the Doorman. Listen to his new song.
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People Say That My VIdeos Fucking Suck… Well This Video Sucks A Lot Harder and That Makes Me Happy…
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Pics of Vida Guerra Dancing
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Anna Semenovich is Hotter than Me
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Christina Aguilera Is Promoting in Europe
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This is a song called Kill The Humans
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Remember Mariah Cary’s Tits? I don’t…
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Condoms are a Big Problem For People in India..
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Mike Tyson Highlight Reel
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Some Titty Submission
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Some GPS Cell Phone Tracker.
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They Say This is the R-Kelly Sex Tape
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Girl Stripping for Virginia Tech Students
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Rachel Bilson See Photoshoot To Love
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Dude, If These Were My Cheerleaders, I’d Never Win, I’d Be Too Focussed On How Ugly The Bitches Cheering for Me Were to Get a Point..
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Some Liz Hurley Bikini Action
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Yamila Diaz Rahi for Sports Illustrated
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Some MTV Contest They Aren’t Paying Me To Link Up
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Lifestyles of the Rich and Fascist Article
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Pauly Shore Gets Punched by a Heckler. I fucking Hate Pauly Shore.
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ThighsWideShut Post of the Day
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Some Angelina Jolie News Cuz She Used to Be Hot
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Guess the City…Nudity….
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Burt Reynold’s Museum
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LastNightsParty in Vegas
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Are These Implants of the Day
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Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

12

Dec

I am – Raven Symone Lovin' Cake of the Day

ravensimone2.jpg

It was Raven Symone’s 21st birthday and she got the cake she always wanted. Unfortunately, cake isn’t just for special occassions in her life, if you know what I mean. Yeah…That was a failed attempt at a fat joke. I never said I was funny. You did…And for the record this girl’s got nothing on my wife.

ravensimone3.jpg

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted