I have to run to some Jason Alexander press conference today because I tricked the publicist of the event that I was media. The problem is that I don’t have a camera or any questions, or a real interest in the motherfucker. One of my pet peaves is when people say “It’s like that episode of Seinfeld” and since he was a big player on that show, I can only assume that he is like every episode of Seinfeld, and that makes me hate him by default. If I wanted to watch a bunch of jews complain, I would go to the Holocaust Museum or call my friend Daveed. He’s a total bitch 98% of the time.

Here are some pics of Tara Reid’s fake tits, looking more like an obese person’s tits after gastric bypass surgery. Take that, slut.

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Pam Anderson is all over the news this week because of her recent engagement to whore-loving Kid Rock. I remember when his sex tape with groupies came out last year and I am convinced that it was a scam because I don’t remember seeing anything more than a shitty backstage preview. I can imagine that he has had lots of sluts, even though he looks like a rat, because he is famous and that’s usually enough for most girls. The other thing I realize is that if you get a girl on a good day and take her out for sushi, you are pretty much locking her down for an unprotected sex session. The reason is because none of us really have any self control, and that’s why people like Pam Anderson are dying of the Hep.

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I didn’t leave my house last night out of fear of getting struck by lighting. My agorophobia is getting worse as the months go on and I haven’t left my apartment in at least 8 days, and when I last did leave it was only for a few minutes before running back to my couch. I think it has something to do with the detox my doctor put me on, it’s got something to do with trying to keep me alive a couple more years. As depressing all this sounds, it really isn’t that bad, and I got a shitload of links here for you to check out, all hand picked by me. If you have anything for the next link dump, hit me up, I generally post everything, unless I forget, which happens.

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I have a hater and his name is Drunken Stepfather Blew My Dog and this is what he had to say:

Holy fuck you are an illiterate motherfucker! “Bra’s”? No caps on a name? Long, unfunny run-on sentences? Do you know about Spell Check? Have you seen the English language before?

That hurt, it brang back memories of when my grade 5 English teacher used to correct my stories with a big red pen. I was Mexican born and new to the country, to the school system and to red pens.

He also had to say:

This stupid rambling paragraph full of weak picture links is why I stopped coming to this place months ago. Stopping again.

You’re so indy!

I post up to date paparazzi pics, they are 500 pixels wide, if that isn’t big enough for you because you can only get off to massive pictures to compensate for your tiny penis, then leaving the site months ago was a good move. I will miss you. I feel like we barely had a chance to get to know each other.

Here’s a post DrunkenStepfahter Blew My Dog made before he was so angry His name was Bradley Whitford and this is what he had to say:

Get back to your real job of showing us accidental nipples or some gay horseshit.

I have to say that I carry both of my kids in one arm while I use the weekwhacker or my sonicare. Fuck it. If something happens to them the wife and I will just make more. It’s when they get older that the investment of time versus starting with a fresh kid makes that seem inconvenient.

Sorry, I don’t have any gay horseshit, but I do have here some useless pics of Marissa Miller from a couple days ago. She’s a bikini model and you’re a cunt. Cuddles.

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I have a hater and his name is Drunken Stepfather Blew My Dog and this is what he had to say:

Holy fuck you are an illiterate motherfucker! “Bra’s”? No caps on a name? Long, unfunny run-on sentences? Do you know about Spell Check? Have you seen the English language before?

That hurt, it brang back memories of when my grade 5 English teacher used to correct my stories with a big red pen. I was Mexican born and new to the country, to the school system and to red pens.

He also had to say:

This stupid rambling paragraph full of weak picture links is why I stopped coming to this place months ago. Stopping again.

You’re so indy!

I post up to date paparazzi pics, they are 500 pixels wide, if that isn’t big enough for you because you can only get off to massive pictures to compensate for your tiny penis, then leaving the site months ago was a good move. I will miss you. I feel like we barely had a chance to get to know each other.

Here’s a post DrunkenStepfahter Blew My Dog made before he was so angry His name was Bradley Whitford and this is what he had to say:

Get back to your real job of showing us accidental nipples or some gay horseshit.

I have to say that I carry both of my kids in one arm while I use the weekwhacker or my sonicare. Fuck it. If something happens to them the wife and I will just make more. It’s when they get older that the investment of time versus starting with a fresh kid makes that seem inconvenient.

Sorry, I don’t have any gay horseshit, but I do have here some useless pics of Marissa Miller from a couple days ago. She’s a bikini model and you’re a cunt. Cuddles.

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There is this bitch named Sophia the Filipino from Singapore who lives in Australia and posts comments on this site under the name “SLUT”. She started reading the site a while ago and she was madly in love with DrunkenStepSteve. She would write him emails and tell him creepy shit about how she wanted him so bad, always in broken english. After Steve left the stepOFFICE for greener opportunities, because let’s face it, Stepfather isn’t a career,it’s not even a business, if anything it’s a little piece of shit that is left smudged on your toilet after a big mexican dump, anyway after Steve left I decided to get my intern to talk to Sophia, because I love talking to immigrants, even if they aren’t immigrants in my backyard. It turns out that she’s a virgin and unstable, this is the message she sent the us today.

Sophia _______________ *
i hate you
because
you
dont wonna
come here
and
be with me
i got to know
this canadian dude
and apparently
he wants me
and hes coming here
to find me
so
you can go
piss off
for all i care
bye

I just wanted to say goodbye to her from Stepfather and post a picture of her in memory of the 5-10 conversations she had with us. Good luck with your Canadian man, I hope he deflowers you gently and that you don’t shred him up with those braces. Cuddles.

And now some Mischa Barton…..

Bonus – In a Dress

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There is this bitch named Sophia the Filipino from Singapore who lives in Australia and posts comments on this site under the name “SLUT”. She started reading the site a while ago and she was madly in love with DrunkenStepSteve. She would write him emails and tell him creepy shit about how she wanted him so bad, always in broken english. After Steve left the stepOFFICE for greener opportunities, because let’s face it, Stepfather isn’t a career,it’s not even a business, if anything it’s a little piece of shit that is left smudged on your toilet after a big mexican dump, anyway after Steve left I decided to get my intern to talk to Sophia, because I love talking to immigrants, even if they aren’t immigrants in my backyard. It turns out that she’s a virgin and unstable, this is the message she sent the us today.

Sophia _______________ *
i hate you
because
you
dont wonna
come here
and
be with me
i got to know
this canadian dude
and apparently
he wants me
and hes coming here
to find me
so
you can go
piss off
for all i care
bye

I just wanted to say goodbye to her from Stepfather and post a picture of her in memory of the 5-10 conversations she had with us. Good luck with your Canadian man, I hope he deflowers you gently and that you don’t shred him up with those braces. Cuddles.

And now some Mischa Barton…..

Bonus – In a Dress

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Jennifer Love Hewitt reminds me of a 3 year old pair of underwear, when in those 3 years you only had that one pair. If you wash it in bleach it still retains its original vibrant white color, but the second you put that shit under a black light, like they do in CSI Miami, you know motherfucker’s got more STDs than you have. Point of the story is that JLH is a dirtbag, who maintains this white bread, good girl, communicate with the dead, angel of god image, while it’s very obvious that she takes it up the ass, by multiple men, all at the same time. Cuddles

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Jennifer Love Hewitt reminds me of a 3 year old pair of underwear, when in those 3 years you only had that one pair. If you wash it in bleach it still retains its original vibrant white color, but the second you put that shit under a black light, like they do in CSI Miami, you know motherfucker’s got more STDs than you have. Point of the story is that JLH is a dirtbag, who maintains this white bread, good girl, communicate with the dead, angel of god image, while it’s very obvious that she takes it up the ass, by multiple men, all at the same time. Cuddles

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