I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

16

Jan

Jessica Alba’s Pregnant Ass is Still Ashamed of the Day

Jessica Alba is ashamed because she knows what she did was wrong and if you don’t know what I am talking about it’s pretty fucking simple. She was involved with this dude Cash Warren, they broke up, he went off to do whatever he does and she ran after him. Being a dude, he fell for the break-up sex, thinking she was on her Birth Control pill or using a condom bitch didn’t poke a hole into and she miraculously got pregnant. Being the good guy he is, he decided it was his duty to walk her through this and try to be together again, despite knowing she did something crazy to lock him in….so it’s just a matter of time before Alba is a single mother working 2 jobs, bringing home random men in hopes of finding a father figure and someone to do the “man jobs” around the house and cuddle her lonely, needy ass at night….

Then again, I could be wrong because I did totally fabricated this story in my paranoid head, but I think it’s the truth and that’s all that matters to me…..


Related Posts:

Jessica Alba is Hiding Behind Magazines from the Camera
Pregnant Alba is Hiding from the Cameras
More Pregnant Alba Hiding from the Cameras
Jessica Alba Keeps Hiding

Posted in:Shame|Unsorted

2008

16

Jan

Britney Spears Buys a Pregnancy Test of the Day because She’s Crazy of the Day


I haven’t been following the Britney Spears story at all because I honestly don’t give a fuck. I am too self absorbed and I find the shit pretty fucking boring because it’s got nothin to do with me. I don’t really care that she’s completely insane or that she’s lost her kids and has been skipping court dates. I guess it’s sad that she’s probably goin to end up killing herself or institutionalized and that someone like her isn’t really safe to have on the streets and that her life is so fucking chaotic and intense when it could have been so relaxed and retired by 23 because she fucked the wrong dude who took her for a ride and ruined her making it like a scene from a really bad movie, all while I sit at my computer in my soiled underwear eating a muffin.

Either way, I heard she’s banging a paparazzi and I am jealous of him, because I’d want to be on the front lines of this shit but that’s just because I think my life is dull and I think it’d be fun. I always had a thing for vulnerable girls, they are easy to win over and K-Fed again and it seems like homie may have already hooked that up, because she was seen out buying a pregnancy test.

I like the way she thinks, if the motherfuckers won’t let her have her babies, she’ll just make herself some more.They can’t stop her tattered womb from doing what it’s supposed to do and that’s the kind of ambition you need to become a success. You don’t take no for an answer, you keep going back to the studio til you find that hit, even if it means fucking an immigrant with a camera to make it happen.

It reminds me of the time girl refused to go on a date with me, so I just climbed her fire escape, crawled into her room and stole all her dirty panties…because let’s face it, that’s all I really wanted her for…and I just wouldn’t take no for an answer….so in a Lot of ways I am like Britney Spears and that’s pretty exciting. Want to see me dance?

Posted in:Unsorted

2008

16

Jan

Rachel Bilson in a Bikini for GQ of the Day


Rachel Bilson is just one of those girl you’d see in the club and totally want to slip the date rape drug into her drink. She’s small and that makes it easier to pull her out by her hair without anyone asking any questions. Once getting her into the cab, you’d just tell the cabby how she just had one too many Tequila shots and that as her longtime friend you want to make sure she gets home safe so that some creepy dude doesn’t get her home and have his way with her, totally tricking him into thinking that you’re not that creepy dude taking her home to have your way with her and possibly even tricking him into giving you a free ride because you’re just that nice and more crafty that a group of grandmas at a church bazaar.

Rachel Bilson does things to me that not many other girls do. She makes me a bad boy. She’s like the girl the rapist said was wearing too short of a skirt and that’s what made him do it. The proof of that is that she made me watch a Zach Braff whiney Jew movie just to see her in one sex scene that lasted a minutre and she also made me watch a whole couple seasons of the OC in one sitting when I was at a friend’s house and the OC marathon was on and I had drank one or two too many cocktails.

The point of all this is to say that I am not a date rapist or any kind of rapist for that matter, but Rachel Bilson could have the power to change that, she’s the kind of girl who makes me want to try new things and explore new worlds but since the the chances of me being in the same room as her are pretty much slim to none, and since I am a pretty sexy middle-aged fat married dude that she’d totally want a piece of and since you can’t rape the willing, this post shouldn’t lead you to calling the police.

It should however lead you to be happy, because GQ has got Rachel Bilson doing some pretty magical half naked things and that’s a good way to start your day. Cuddles.


Related Posts:

Hayden Panettiere and Rihanna are Sluts For GQ
Jessica Biel Bikini for GQ
Lohan is Hot for GQ

Posted in:Unsorted

2008

16

Jan

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

I was walking down the street and had a celebrity encounter. Some tall, mean looking black girl was walking towards me with her big bald black boyfriend and I turned to the drunken asshole I was with and said it was Omarosa from the Apprentice, thinking I was making a bad racist joke. The drunken asshole I was with turned to me and told me that is was her and about 3 seconds later some TMZ lookin’ paparazzi punk kid sprints by us to get his footage with her. I am telling you this because I am tired of being called a racist and getting racist hate mail when clearly I know my black people.

Here are my links:

Mark Ronson is Amy Winehouse’s Coke Dealer
GO

Some Teen Throws Some Crazy Party and Makes the News in Australia as He Hides from His Parents
GO

HOT “MODEL” GIRLS HIT THE SHEETS
GO

Some Funny Police Brutality On Some Crazy Bitch
GO

Vida Guerra working out those Glutes
GO

Some Paris Hilton Panty Upskirt Pictures
GO

Mena Suvari in a Hot Photoshoot
GO

Some David Choe Sexy Tea Stain Pussy Shots
GO

Jessica Simpson’s Dad Tips Off the Paparazzi Because He is Scum
GO

Here’s Some Club Slut Named Kimberly Holland in her Lingerie Posing…
GO

Some Lohan Freaking Out at the Paparazzi and Not at Me Video
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Here’s Some Guide to Lingerie for You People Who Will Never Find a Woman To Buy Lingerie For
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Some Model Named Elizabeth Banks Posing Like the Slut that She Is….
GO

Some Weird Co-Workers Had Sex in Their Seats on the Plane and Got Arrested When THey Landed
GO

1 Girl 1 Pitcher is My New Favorite Site
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Some Billionaire’s Girlfriend’s Ass in a Bikini For You
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Kelly Osborne and Amy Winehouse Rockin’ Out Together in London
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Chase Crawford from Gossip Girl Has Some Myspace Pics That Have Hit the Net – These are Them
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Jenna Jameson in 1996 at the AVN Awards Flashback
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Good Faggot Madden Talks About His Baby With Nicole Richie
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Some Hot Girls Naked Together Photoshoot
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Some Jamie Pressley Lookin’ Good After Having Her Baby
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Some Hysterical Advice from Khia for Hood Magazine
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Kimberly Stewart Lookin’ Disgusting on Her Way To Villa Lounge in LA
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Her Name is Cody Lane and She’s Shoving Things in Her Ass
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Here are Some Topless and Slutty Pictures of the King of France’s New Girlfriend Who He Will Probably Marry
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Here are Some Hot Chick Computer Tips
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Pornstar Signing Autographs at the AVN’s in a See-Through Outfit
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Pam Anderson’s Tits Reunited With Tommy Lee at at Baseball Game
GO

Erykah Badu Takes On Being A Clown
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Rihanna Lookin’ Whiter Than Ever
GO

Some Celebrity Impersonator Video
GO

A MOMENT OF CLARITY FOR “BOOTH BABES”
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Some Major Hump Dancing Video
GO

Some Crazy Wrestler Stabs his Opponent
GO

Some Naked Chick Drinking Alizee Cuz She’s Gangster
GO

Britney Spears Hard Nipples, Stained Shirt, Short Shorts Pictures I Was Going to Post But Forgot TO
GO

Some Girl Dancing on a Dildo Ball
GO

Some Pre-911 World Trade Center Ad
GO

Some Hot Fucking Photobucket Chick NAKED
GO

Bad Girls Club Episode Preview With Girls in Booty Shorts…
GO

Some Tom Cruise is Crazy in his Scientologist Speech
GO

Kid Rock Gave A Bus Boy $1000
GO

Monica Hansen in FHM
GO

Some Amateur UFO VIdeo
GO

Ashley Tisdale And Her New Penis
GO

Matthew McConaughey Knocks Up His Hot Slut….Proper.
GO

Britney Spears Wrote a Suicide Letter Because She’s Crazy
GO

Gwyneth Paltrow Was Hospitalized For Being Ugly
GO

Crazy Britney Spears Had a Naked Shopping Spree in a Betsey Johnson Store….Because She’s Fucking Crazy
GO

Some Paris Hilton Bikini Pictures for Some Photoshoot….
GO

Oprah is Taking Over the World and that Turns Me On
GO

Alessandra Ambrosio May Be Pregnant
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Some Fat Dude Chugging a Thing of Maple Syrup Because It’s Something Only a Fat Dude Would DO
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FROM THE FORUM

The Cars Anthology
GO

Danielle Lloyd Thread
GO

Spank Rock – Yo Yo Yo Yo Yo
GO

The Pretenders Greatest Hits
GO

Danzig
GO

Mazzy Star – She hangs Brightly
GO

This chick should be in porn – video
GO

A new type of sex toy – NSFW
GO

Talking Heads – stop making sense
GO

You Need this Shirt Because You Think You Can Get Laid
GO

Find PORN!!!
GO

Stop Being a Loser – Cover Your Stink and Seduce Women
GO

Get Yourself A Slut….
GO

Posted in:Unsorted

2008

15

Jan

Brad Renfro is Dead of the Day

Known Heroin addict and child star Brad Renfro was found dead in his home at 9 am this morning by his girlfriend. I guess the real issue is who the fuck is showing up at anyone’s house at 9 in the fucking morning I think there are rules against that shit.

Either way, he was in Bully and a few other movies like The Client and Apt Pupil and now his next role is going to be 6 feet under….

Self Destruction is a sad thing, but when self destruction actually works and the motherfucker dies, I have little sympathy. If he was found dead because of cancer or AIDS or a heart defect or a car accident or foul play or some shit, I’d be a little nicer, but this selfish heroin bullshit is just drawn out suicide that isn’t fair to the people who actually love the motherfucker…That said, the cause of death is unknown….and it’s probably bad luck if I don’t say Rest in Peace Motherfucker.

Read the Article
GO

Posted in:Brad Renfro|Dead|Unsorted

2008

15

Jan

Eva Mendes’ Cleavage Makes Me Feel Like a Loser of the Day

Nothing says that I am all man like posting pictures of a girl’s cleavage like I love the shit so much that I can’t get enough of it and need to run to my website to talk about it. This is the internet version of going to the mall and sitting across from some busty slag in the food court and just freaking out over her tits as they spill out of her shirt as she unsuspectingly bends the fuck over to put more mustard on her corn dog or some shit.

Posting pictures of some celebrity I don’t give a fuck about showing off some cleavage shirt definitely doesn’t make me feel like a loser with no fucking sex life or no fucking life at all, giving me the time to crop this shit and post it like it’s fucking worth everyone’s attention….It’s basically saying that a girl can’t wear a cleavage shirt without having some pervert staring them down….unfortunately today I am that pervert and I’m not proud of it.

Here are some pictures of Eva Mendes showing off some cleavage and here I am making a big deal about it like I give a fuck. Cuddles.

Posted in:Unsorted

2008

15

Jan

Beyonce’s Got a Camel Toe of the Day

The problem for girls who are bigger than they like to admit is that they usually wear pants that are too small for them and those pants ride up their pussies like shit was the school bus and they had no fuckin’ choice because if they didn’t their mom’s would ground the fuckers and school would give them a fuckin’ detention or some shit.

The good thing about girls who are bigger than they like to admit is that we get to see what their pussies look like through their pants as they ride the shit like it was a school bus and they had no choice.

So as Beyonce gets older and rounder her pants stay the same and lucky for us we get to see a little camel toe cunt definition, because despite it not being the same kind of luck as winning a million dollars or actually getting pussy, it’s its own kind of luck that makes staring at your computer a little more entertaining.

After zooming in on the shit, I realize that there’s no fucking cameltoe in these pictures and I reported false fucking news, unfortunately I am in too deep to pull the story so fuck it.


Related Posts:

Beyonce Vagina Slip of the Day
Beyonce in a Leotard Performing
Beyonce Flashes Her Tits on Stage
Some Beyonce in an Orange Bikini Pictures
Beyonce in a See Through Shirt

Posted in:Pussy Definition|Unsorted

2008

15

Jan

Janice Dickinson Showing Us How Flexible Her Rubber Body Is of the Day

Fake tits are retarded and I don’t understand the psychology behind getting that shit, but they seem to be pretty fucking popular amongst girls who like asshole muscle dudes in Ed Hardy t-shirts with frosted spiked hair.

They also seem to be popular with girls who like to flaunt that shit like they were born with big tits and the fuckers are something special that not just anybody could have if they had the money or interest. It’s like when my asshole friend shows off his flat screen TV to me and tells me how fucking awesome it is, like he’s living the fuckin’ dream, meanwhile the fucking thing cost him 600 dollars, and that’s not that much fuckin’ money, making his dream pretty fucking attainable for the average fuckin’ man.

None of that really matters because I’ve been talking about fake tits way too fuckin’ much the last couple of days, it’s like I’ve been dreaming, breathing and eating the fuckers or something and I can only blame the AVN awards I didn’t attend for tainting me with images of porn sluts and dreams of fuckin’ pornstars because they pretty much fuck anything.

Here’s some Janice Dickinson bikini pictures because being old, haggard and leather skinned may not allow her to model anymore, but shit is encouraged in the porn industry so all she’s gotta do is shift things out a little and by shift things out I mean take some cock up in her on camera…..she’s already got all the moves down because she’s had so much plastic surgery, bitch moves like she’s made of rubber, so we’re halfway there and that’s more than I can say for myself about pretty much anything except maybe being a faillure, but i like the think I’ve done that right and I’m fully there.

Related Posts:

Janice Dickinson’s Pantyhose Flash
Janice Dickinson’s Bra Flash

Posted in:Unsorted

2008

15

Jan

Paris Hilton the Drunken MC on the Mic at LAX of the Day

Here is a video I heard about yesterday from LAX Sundays in Hollywood for the Banana Split party featuring DJ “Gayer Than Bicycle Shorts” AM and Aoki where Paris Hilton shows us what money does to a girl who could have been high society, sipping tea with royalty, playing tennis with other blue blooded people named Blair, but instead chose to be a coked up whore who goes to shitty clubs and dances while getting wasted like she was a piece of trailer park trash on crystal meth fucking on camera to pay for the next hit, because I guess you can’t buy class, but you can buy drugs and it’s probably a lot more fun than class, even if you embarrass yourself and your family in the process.

I ripped off the transcript of what she said from another site, because I am lazy so here it is:

“. . . by the way this Sunday fucking night DJ am is here–the shit–he has all his boys–he fucking rocks. LAX is the best fucking place to go. Sunday night is my new favorite night. Everyone in here is rocking their fucking balls off. I love it. I wanna suck it, fuck it, lick it, eat it, snort it, fuck it, [unintelligible]. So lets all party our nuts off because this is the best crowd. Fuck the Hollywood crowd. I love the LAX crowd. They’re all here fucking DJ AM Steve Aoki and all of AM’s fucking boys who are the best DJs ever. We’re gonna have so much fun tonight. I love you and there’s so many hot girls and boys here that I wanna fuck you all. I love you all.�

I know a few people who were at this event and apparently she was celebrating her birthday and kissing up on all the DJs and was acting all kinds of crazy. When they told me they had pictures of the event, I just didn’t give a fuck, because I see shots of Paris partying and dancing around like a useless cunt more often than I see my cock, which is also a useless cunt, but a little more penis-influenced, but that’s not the point. She’s played out, she’s old, she’s done did and I think the world is ready for Paris to jump off a bridge or have an overdose in her million dollar home. because clearly the glory days are over, but you gotta give her credit and that is that all young girls fuck on camera now, because of what Paris did and that makes surfing exgirlfriend porn a hell of a lot more interesting than it was 10 years ago and that’s not such a bad legacy to have. Cuddles.


Related Posts:

Paris Hilton’s Vagina Exlcusive Doesn’t Mean It’s an Exclusive Vagina, If You Know What I mean
Paris Hilton Does stepTV
Paris Hilton Exclusive Party Pictures
Paris Hilton Practices For New Years
All of My Paris Hilton Posts Ever of All Time…

Posted in:Disaster|Unsorted

2008

15

Jan

stepLINKS of the Day

I have been sick all day and I’ve had the worse gas of my life all day. I ate some mexican food and it raped my insides because Mexico food in Canada doesn’t work for Mexican dudes. For the first time in my life I smell like my wife’s pussy and it’s turning me on, so as I sit here lookin’ for links, I just keep breathing the toxic shit in and feel like I am tasting a piece of heaven…..

Speaking of Heaven, A Plastic Surgeon Reads the Site, Because I Attract High Society and He Responded with Why Jenna’s Tits are So Wonky…Check it Out…
GO

Now here are my links:

Here’s a Brutal Race Car Accident…
GO

Some Drunk Paris Hilton Video
GO

Club Slut Jennifer Hanley
GO

Bjork is Insane …. We Only Realize this Now
GO

Flower Tucci is a Pornstar Showing Off Her Ass In a Dress…
GO

Pulp FIction Writer Gets Arrested for Manslaughter
GO

Rachel Bilson Refuses to Go Naked
GO

Amy Reid Showing her Vagina Pictures
GO

Vanessa Hudgens in Short Shorts
GO

Your New Favorite Sport – Cock Boxing
GO

Some Crazy Homeless Guy Video
GO

Some Sweet Child of Mine Video Gayness
GO

Some Ashley Tisdale in Shorts Pictures
GO

Guy gets caught beating his meat…
GO

Spice Girls At Some Fashion Show
GO

Jennifer Aniston May Be Banging David Spade
GO

Some Big Boob Prank Video
GO

Here’s a Lesbian Shower Video
GO

This is the Easiest Way to See Up a Girls Skirt
GO

Amy Winehouse and All Kinds of Crazy at the Supermarket
GO

Club Slut Forbidden
GO

Some Young Girls Dip It Low in Some Tennis Skirts
GO

Britney Spears Rocking an Intensely Rude Jacket…
GO

Exclusive Britney in the Bathroom of the Courthouse Story That Involves Her Pulling Out Her Tampon and Swinging it Around Her Head Insanity….Holy Shit.
GO

Glenn Close Is Turnin’ Me On With Her Milky Mustache…
GO

Some Lingerie Photoshoot Video
GO

Some Fucking Hot Webcam Video
GO

Some Crazy Guy on the Subway Video
GO

Scrape the Wall You Farting Bitch
GO

Talking Vagina Video…
GO

Check Out the Crazy Dollhouse Dude at the Britney Spears Court Case
GO

Nicky Watson Bikini Pictures
GO

Some Clip from the Movie The Ten of Jesus Taking Someone’s Virginity….because Being the Son of God Used to Go Far with the Ladies….
GO

Video of a guy that snaps his leg in half trying some stupid BMX stunt
GO

Heidi Montag for Maxim Photoshoot Video
GO

This is Some Hot Playboy Chick Wrestling Didn’t Want
GO

Cop Runs Over a Handicapped Dude
GO

You Need this Shirt Because You Think You Can Get Laid
GO

Find PORN!!!
GO

Stop Being a Loser – Cover Your Stink and Seduce Women
GO

Get Yourself A Slut….
GO

FROM PHOTOBUCKET:

Some Photobucket Panty and Pussy Shots
GO

Vagina and Anal Play on Photobucket
GO

Some Photobucket Vagina and Tit Lickin’
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Some Self Shot Pics for Some Suburban Gangster
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Some Girl’s TIt and Panty Ass Flash
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Some Nude Portraits
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Some Young Lookin Vagina
GO

Some Self Shot Big Tits
GO

Army Chick – G-String and Tits
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Some Self Shot Vagina
GO

More Tits an Ass
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FROM THE FORUM

Heart Thread
GO

Stevie Ray Vaughn
GO

Life Aquatic OST
GO

Incubus – Morning View
GO

Awesome Exhibitionist
GO

Posted in:Unsorted