Sometimes I get my social media confused, especially when I am masturbating to your pics. It is like I right swipe on instagram and double click on TINDER,confusing the fuck out of me…but at least I still remember how to jerk off. The only problem is that my penis doesn’t… All this to say, thanks […]

Sometimes nothing funny happens to you in your day, so you have to stand in the cookie aisle at the grocery store, waiting for the fattest and loneliest bitch to come around on a Friday night, in efforts to convince her that the chocolate mint thins will in fact make her lose weight…I mean get […]

Earlier today, I was checking my snapchat…at the grocery store, because I get so many asshole pics of girls I have to constantly check them so that I don’t miss any…and I walked right into some mom bending over tending to her baby. My dick pretty much slammed right between her ass cheeks like I […]

The nice thing about being a married, obese, poor as fuck, pretty disgusting, unshowered, rude, old impotent alcoholic asshole of a a man….is that when girls agree to have sex with me, I know they’ve lost their fucking minds. Here are some stepLINKS… Chelsea Handler’s New Tit Pic GO Man WHo Taunts Police on FB […]

Chelsea Handler Tits don’t really deserve a post of their own…but it is Mardi Gras…and I love New Orleans and Titties… In her defence no tits really need a post of their own… They are just tits, which is what her whole campaign is, but the reality is, they are the only thing getting her […]

I always love running into strippers or escorts I’ve met while drinking and paying them to make their vaginas do a puppet show…during the day…at the grocery store…with their kids…or moms…for some reason, it brings me great joy. The double life, ho pretending to not be a ho…..That happened today. It was a highlight….another highlight…watching […]

A photo posted by www.drunkenstepfather.com (@drunkenstepfatherdotcom) on Feb 10, 2015 at 2:50pm PST I know it isn’t morning, but when you’re an alcoholic who sleeps all day, when not at celebrity events with Taylor Swift and Hozier….Katy Perry and Diplo…Ed Sheeran and Sam Smith…and god knows who the fuck else, open bar has a tendency […]

The failed sext of the day has been: “Feed me with your pussy, like you would feed a starving African baby you see in a back alley on your African Safari vacation you’ve been saving up for the last 3 years and finally got to take.”….you can interchange African Safaris with pretty much any situation […]