The problem with everyone being a whore on instagram for fame and attention is that it gives a huge responsibility to the consumer or viewer to figure out whether the girl is An actual whore…while they are all whores for the right rich guy who feeds into their needs and wants to get fame and […]

The most amazing thing happened to me today….I left the house for the better part of the afternoon because my wife had terrible stomach issues and was shitting herself and I couldn’t take the fucking smell… So I went to the park that I drink at…and I didn’t see one single ass cheek in short […]

Asking a woman if her husband she is getting a divorce from’s new piece of ass that she’s whining about in hr facebook status has a tighter vagina than her…is not the best way to make friends with a hurting Divorcee… Watching cam girls for an hour only for them to not get naked, but […]

Getting a Dog strictly to look down women who pet the dog’s shirt is not perverted…it’s like when companies do weird initiatives to give back to charity when they are monetizing the fuck out of the cause…you know evil intentions presented as good intentions…that give a dog a home and make you a best friend […]

I don’t see enough fat chicks knock themselves out while jogging with their own fat tit…because not enough fat girls jog…. I do see enough shirtless fat guys in bandanas though…but I guess that isn’t saying much, since one shirtless fat guy in a bandana is more than enough. I don’t see enough hot college […]

Fat girls…..complaining about how they would have been considered hot in the 1400s when fat meant fed and not diseased because everyone died at 30….assuming that if those were still the same feminine ideals in hotness that they’d be considered hot….clearly haven’t seen BBW where clearly people are into this fat thing….or Ashley Graham and […]

I am glad to know uptight jocks still exist… I met a dude the other day who must have been a cop or military…just a dude…who likes dude things….and who said: I don’t sun tan, that’s for queers. I don’t eat corn dogs that’s for queers. I don’t shop for clothes or food, that’s for […]

My wife told me that having sex with me is like removing a dry tampon only dick is smaller….despite her being fat and menopausal and even when she got her period she wore fucking diapers…that was nice of her. I am glad I am stuck with her… The other thing I am glad about is […]

I am still masturbating to Princess Diana in her bathing suit for the Royal Wedding that everyone seems to be excited about, that no one I know actually cares about, so that I assume I am milking the Royal Wedding as hard as I can….literally…it’s ineffective, but it works for other people.. Here are some […]

Hey Baby… Are the words a street hooker said to me last night while I was walking back home…and I thought…how sweet, and kind, and affectionate that was… If only more people were trying to get money out of me… The world would be a brighter, more beautiful place… If only I had 50 dollars […]