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Archive for the Izabel Goulart Category

2014

15

Apr

Izabel Goulart’s Fitness Tip of the Day

I don’t really know what this fitness move is, I just know it’s being performed by Izabel Goulart, the hard-faced, hard-bodied, fitness model sent from Fitness heaven/Brazil to make instagram a better place and remind all your fat sluts that if you got to the gym, you may be a model too…

I just know i want to Lick it…

If you don’t like that…here’s a bikini pic…with her hairy legs…because this is a self shot bikini pic, not a Victoria’s Secret studio shot bikini pic…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

04

Apr

Izabel Goulart Booty Shot of the Day

Izabel Goulart is pretty fucking alright…sure she has a man face and is ripped so hard you’d think that she was a Brazilian tranny working the street corner in some sex tourism sting operation…but those legs, and that ass, that only come with being tall as fuck and addicted to fitness justify her lingerie modelling career, you know one of the trannies, if she is even a tranny, who you would fuck, because trannys, despite you hating their dicks and their balls, sometimes have some winning features, especially when those dicks and balls are turned away from us…not that Iza is a tranny, but I guess all girls who do a lot of fitness with hard faces, kinda look like they are…

Either, way..this isn’t a tranny debate, with myself, because no one is listening, it’s a celebration of a booty pic on the internet. Yay.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

26

Mar

Izabel Goulart Fitness Video of the Day

I’ve been the gym at least once in my lifetime…and it did not look like this…but if it did, I can safely say I would have taken up fitness over drinking, because it turns out skinny bitches from drug addiction and malnourishment is far less hot that a bitch with a tight body…that works for that body…and that takes care of that body…even if the fit bitch is too alert and energized to be taken advantage of all high on protein shakes and green juices rather than sedatives to come down for cocaine…

All this to say, Iza Goulart almost inspires me to get healthy, but instead makes me just want to jerk off to work out videos like it was the 80s and they were the only think on TV…in a simpler time before porn.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

21

Mar

Izabel Goulart Fitness Video of the Day

If fitness really looked like Izabel Goulart…doing fitness…I can’t imagine why anyone in world would have any job other than personal trainer or “fitness photographer”….or fitness wear designer…because this shit is so hot it makes me want to work out…luckily for me working out or breaking a sweat happens every time I get up to the bathroom..

Thank you 12 hours of internet for giving me this body no one wants…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

11

Mar

Iza Goulart Fitness Tip of the Day

Thanks for the tip Izabel Goulart…you lean fitness and bikini and lingerie model machine that thanks to her high muscle mass and testosterone she’s slowly transitioning to a native Tranny from Brazil, that I don’t mind is a tranny, because trannies try harder to be ladies than ladies, not that Izaebel Goulart is a tranny, but if she was, I’d totally suck her dick…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

10

Mar

Izabel Goulart Tennis Porn of the Day

Izabel Goulart is the best thing to happen to Brazilian fitness, bikini, lingerie modelling pretty much ever and here she is out of the gym and on the tennis court, probably because she knows I have a tennis fetish, and that I stand outside local tennis tournaments all summer, all because looking’ up skirts and hearing bitches grunt like they are getting fucked, especially rich and classy tennis playing bitches, is my fucking porn…I mean…unless she doesn’t know I exist, which I am going to assume she doesn’t, but this is the internet and I can pretend whatever I want, hater.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

26

Feb

Izabel Goulart and Other Models at ETAM Lingerie SHow of the Day

This is some video of fittest instagram model Izabel Goulart…who sidelines as a Victoria’s Secret model…because it helps her get followers and likes on her instagram…which as we know is all that matters when you are a model…

She is apparently cheating on Victoria’s Secret with ETAM, who Victoria’s Secret probably manufacture for in their sweatshops in Bangledesh, where they pay a kid 5 dollars a week to make 10,000 push up bras for white people…who will buy them for 100 dollars or 3 for 100 depending on the deal…

And who cares…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

10

Feb

Izabel Goulart’s Fitness Moment of the Day

Izabel Goulart kills the instagram game with her fitness videos of herself doing really interesting sex poses…pretty much simulating sex in motions that she pretends are for fitness…something that may happen at the gym but I wouldn’t know because the last time I was in a gym I was asked to leave for locking myself in a the ladies locker room…it’s a fetish…

But seriously, watching this makes me want to get into the gym, even though I know I’ll be greeted by fat lazy people, and not supermodels…but I have a feeling the more instagram happens, the more fit people get celebrated, the more the world will see why we like skinny people, and the less pigs like Lena Dunham will end up on TV…it’s a positive move….

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

06

Feb

Izabel Goulart Does Squats of the Day

Izabel Goulart has a hard face…but more importantly a hard fucking body that she works on everyday and produces videos of to either promote her qualities and her “good” or marketable parts…or maybe it’s to promote fitness to young girls who think models are just born this way and don’t work at it via working out or doing tons of drugs and starving themselves…but I like to think she’s promoting men using social media for masturbation purposes…because that’s all I see going on here.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

04

Feb

Izabel Goulart Has a Pretty Shitty Face of the Day

Izabel Goulart proves that when she’s not showing off her fitness…through instagram pics of her fitness…or Victoria’s Secret shoots of half nakedness…that I am usually impressed by because having a fit body is a fucking accomplishment that takes serious work and dedication that the average lazy motherfucker doesn’t have because they are too busy eating donuts…she’s got a pretty shitty face…that is up on some Sarah Jessica Parker…fort shaped, Jay Leno chin weirdness…just masculine and hard…but I guess when you know what’s under these shitty outfits…none of that face really matters…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

30

Jan

Izabel Goulart’s Fitness Move of the Day

This is the reason I don’t work out…I don’t think my pervert self would be able to contain myself seeing girls half naked pulling moves like this…it just can’t be healthy for me, while it is healthy for them…and even if no supermodels, or even babes work out at the gyms I would go to, and even if the last time I was in a gym, the women were all old and fat…and I am talking real fucking fat…seeing them try these stunts in tight clothes would still make it hard for me to contain myself in my spandex shorts….

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

24

Jan

Izabel Goulart Workout Video of the Day

When it comes to Izaebel Goulart, even the not very sexy videos of her working out are hot as fuck…you know the ones where her ass exercises aren’t in HD, wearing skimpy shorts and that I can barely make out every crevice, fold and inch of her body…but it’s still nice to see her doing long skinny leg moves…in an up and down motion…because it helps me imagine my face being her sweat soaked panties…that is if she’s even wearing panties…I’m in love…and you should be too…especially if you’re a fat girl…use this to motivate you to start starving for male attention…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

16

Jan

Izabel Goulart is a Fucking Machine of the Day

Fit as fuck Izabel Goulart proves that having an average at best face doesn’t matter when you are built like a fucking lean, fat-less, toned machine who works out every fucking day and looks amazing doing it….so good that Victoria’s Secret hires her for their Runway shows, while all the other models are out starving themselves and doing coke all night…this girl’s a fucking fitness machine…and I like watching her do things that I can’t do but would try eating her out if she was doing it in front of me, while she was doing it….

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

14

Jan

Izabel Goulart Work Out Pics of the Day

Izabel Goulart posted these workout pics to her instagram, an instagram I think is the best instagram around, not because she’s got the best face, but because she’s got a banging body…proving that even if you’re not the prettiest, you can fool a whole lot of motherfuckers into thinking you are, just as long as you put in work…but then again, maybe girls who work out is a fetish to me…because my girl is a fucking cow.

Posted in:Izabel Goulart

2014

01

Jan

Izabel Goulart’s Thai Vacation on Istagram of the Day

It looks like Izabel Goulart is in Thailand on vacation with someone I assume is a professional photographer, like she was Petra Nemcova, only without the Tsunami and dead photographer….but rather amazingly shot instagram pics that look like they are a bad scan from a magazine…to remind us all that our lives fucking suck…but not as hard as that Phuket lady boy, who is being put to work hard the past week thanks to all the fat American, German, Australian, Russian perverts in THailand to fuck Lady Boys…

Posted in:Izabel Goulart